[CartDown]

I've been crying on and off all day. Screaming in the car, punching the steering wheel, the whole bit. All because my therapist told me I can't change what he already thinks of me because he already knows me. It's too late. I don't know what he knows or thinks of me, he didn't bother to add that part and I didn't ask because I know it's irrelevant and I'm trying to seem chill. I ended up sending 3 emails in less than 15 hours afterwards. I didn't ask for a reply in the first 2, thinking just letting it out it out would be enough, but it wasn't and I told him I wanted to know what he thought of me no matter if it's negative or positive. Of course, he didn't answer, It's not like I made it simple for him so now I feel like a moron because I did it to myself. I'm just overwhelmed and obsessed. I even had to fight myself from wanting to call him and I NEVER call him. I hate talking on the phone and I dont want to keep bothering him and drive him away. I just need to get through these next couple days. Someone on another forum mentioned that he may have said it to provoke me. Is that even a thing? It seems cruel and I never thought him to be cruel. It's got me thinking, that's for sure.

[SlumberKitty]

Not trying to be a smart aleck here but maybe your T thinks of you as a genuinely nice and kind person. And there's nothing you can do to change his positive regard for you. HUGS Kit

[CartDown]

Originally Posted by SlumberKitty

Not trying to be a smart aleck here but maybe your T thinks of you as a genuinely nice and kind person. And there's nothing you can do to change his positive regard for you. HUGS Kit

Well... that would be embarrassing.

Originally Posted by CartDown

Well... that would be embarrassing.

I would assume he meant it as a positive too...

As far as provoking goes, yes. Though it sounded nothing like this.

[ArtleyWilkins]

I suspect it was a positive statement, saying he won't change his mind on your quality no matter what you think you might do to lower his opinion of you.

[CartDown]

Oh my God. I'm so incredibly embarrassed. It's like I'm incapable of thinking positively sometimes.

[Anne2.0]

Good luck getting a therapist to collude in your negative assessments of yourself. Though the profession might have some real morons in it, this is usually an easy cow pie to step around. However, I'm a little mystified as to why it makes sense to argue with other people about what they think about you. Your thoughts are independent of what others think, so who cares what he thinks? Go ahead and believe what you want. What someone else thinks doesn't change this.

[CartDown]

Originally Posted by Anne2.0

Good luck getting a therapist to collude in your negative assessments of yourself. Though the profession might have some real morons in it, this is usually an easy cow pie to step around. However, I'm a little mystified as to why it makes sense to argue with other people about what they think about you. Your thoughts are independent of what others think, so who cares what he thinks? Go ahead and believe what you want. What someone else thinks doesn't change this.

I always care what others think of me. I'm scared to get close to people in fear of being rejected. I avoid social situations and keep everyone at a distance. Even my husband.

[downandlonely]

I agree with the others. Try to see this in a positive light. Are you constantly saying negative things about yourself in therapy? If that's the case, your therapist could have a positive opinion of you no matter what you say. I'm not sure if he was trying to provoke you or not. This is definitely something to bring up at your next appointment.

[stopdog]

I have read articles and books where it is a technique they use at times.

[CartDown]

Now I feel like I should send him an apology, but he might appreciate it more if I wait till Monday. I hate when I make something out of nothing.

[Forgetmenot07]

What was your initial reaction? What did you think he would say about you?
I agree with the other members that he probably ment it in a positive manner to help you feel safe.