3 sessions in

Three sessions in and my Psychologist wants to combine all my child parts into one and age progress them into an adult through hypnosis . That way we can all be relatable. I said Whoa! I dont even know them well.

That seems like a lot really quickly...are you sure you have no other options?

Yes, I have the option to get to know them better then do it or I can not do it at all. It scares me to even think about it.

Hugs that very quick and very scary. If you are not comfortable doing that you do not have to. Therapy should never be so quick and three sessions is not long at all. I hope you can talk to her and see what else there is to help you cope better in life. Hugs

I'm a big fan of integration, and a big fan of making progress in therapy. Sounds like a good plan to me. Why not give it a try?

If I didn't do something because I'm afraid, that would stop me from doing pretty much anything. The buddhists like to say feel the fear and do it anyway. No one is a slave to their emotional reactions.

Because I dont want to be any different than I am in the area of having alters. They were formed to protect me. I dont want them to change in any way.

Absolutely NO.

Can you elaborate on that further? She also said I had a perpetrator alter and I was like how can you know by 3 sessions?

That T has no freaking idea what she is doing! And she calls herself a "specialist" in DID? She has seen you three times and doesn't even know IF you have a system let alone KNOW the system.
Aside from the whole question of IF you have DID, which she cannot honestly or professionally determine after giving you a "test" for it some number of years ago, and now seeing you a grand total of three times more recently. Aside from that incredibly dodgy practise, if she believes you have child alters caused by trauma then she should darned well know that they were created to PROTECT you, and she should have no darned business messing with that protection system until both of you have more knowledge about what and how and why they are there. She has no IDEA what they could be protecting you against, and what outcome there would be from prematurely messing with them.

OMG I hope you run away from her and do not ever return to her. That is NOT how safe, professional, and researched therapy for a trauma based dissociative disorder should go.

I was diagnosed with DID about two years ago and since then my T has followed the international guidelines for the treatment of DID, which have us still firmly planted in stage 1 of treatment which is ONLY about developing a connection with the therapist, developing grounding skills and the ability to stay in the present, and very slowly developing our knowledge of the system. At no time has my therapist wanted to "rearrange my system".

You don't know this woman, she doesn't really know you, and after seeing you for three hours she wants to dive in and rearrange your whole personality system? Do you really think that is a good idea???? What the heck does she know about you?? NOTHING.

Please protect yourself from this woman. Look, I know we shouldn't really tell other people what to do in their own therapy when supposedly their own treatment provider knows them and the situation best, but please, this is one very glaringly obvious case where - if you are telling us the truth about all that is going on - this woman is absolutely not doing the right thing for you, a client she barely knows. Even if she DID know you quite well back then, which I don't believe she did from all you have said, now is not then and she should not be acting on prior knowledge.

Please stay safe.

She cannot. Just like she cannot possibly know about Michael Jackson. This woman is batshit crazy.

I don't have a lot of knowledge about DID, but I'll still give my two cents on this.

From what I understand, DID is most often caused by trauma and your alters are there to protect you. You could look at this as a coping mechanism.

Self-harm is also a coping mechanism. I'll talk about that because I know it better. If somebody is self-harming, the therapist should not tell them to stop doing it. Instead, the client should learn that there's different coping mechanisms and how they work and with time, those coping mechanisms should hopefully be preferred over harming oneself.

I think with DID it's similar. I think it's possible to 'combine' your alters into one being, from my limited understanding. But I also think it should be done after extensive therapy, if at all. Otherwise it's like with self-harm: you suddenly lose all your coping skills and are left with nothing. This usually does not lead to a healthy being, rather what usually happens is that those people find alternatives, for example eating disorders. I don't think it's wise to just jump into this after a couple of sessions.

Especially if you're not certain yourself. If you're happy the way you currently are or even if you just want to get to know your alters better before doing this, that's perfectly reasonable and normal. I also agree with Amyjay that this therapist knows far too little about you to help you integrate all your parts in a way that will be good for you.

I was diagnosed with DDNOS 9 years ago, now would probably be OSDD, which is similar to DID except that I don't "lose time". When I am in an "alter" state, I remember what went on. But the emotions and reactions are different in the different states.

I saw the best dissociation consultant in my area, and was referred to another specialist in trauma and dissociation in my area, became more familiar with my alters, especially two who had "felt" like demons. In my regular, adapted state I kept them turned off, numbed out

In the end the therapist couldn't tolerate the "demons". I suspect they may have seemed like kids having tantrums, or being vicious. My normal state was very dissociated from them, and I had "control" by keeping them turned off. But if and when I allowed them on, in the therapy room, the therapist couldn't tolerate them and eventually terminated me.

I am suspicious about how well researched is the idea that hypnosis could integrate and age progress parts. With what I know now about my "alters", I would be terrified of that idea. I know now my alters are/were there for a reason. Even kids having tantrums are there for a reason. Not sure they would want to be "age progressed" without taking whatever reason that may be into account.

And, yeah, a kid having a tantrum can seem like and be a perpetrator, maybe, if somebody wants to use that language. I find it overly judgmental and derogatory. Mine mostly perpetrated against me but sometimes they perpetrated against the therapist. (I called her a "b***h" one time.) I could control that kind of behavior by keeping them out of the room -- but then, where was there any therapy?

As I said, for me, they are/were there for a reason. Learning that reason, trying to and finding ways to accept the impulses that they have, I'm getting somewhat integrated, I think.

I don't see how hypnosis could really short circuit that -- I could be wrong, maybe it can. But I would definitely like to see the research and become convinced it was worth a try before I did it.

Didn't you see this therapist years ago, so she knows you, and wasn't she involved in discussions with your other therapist recently? So the reality is that this "three sessions" in isn't really that she's only seen you for 3 sessions and otherwise had no contact with you. She's your former therapist IIRC and has been involved in your previous treatment with the therapist who is going on leave. It seems to me that she knows you quite well.

I also think that if you're not interested in any kind of change, there's nothing wrong with that. But is no change helping you progress in your life? It's quite possible to integrate alters without losing your ability to keep yourself safe. In fact, it's quite possible to improve your ability to be self protective in perhaps more "mature" ways and do some integration at the same time. I don't buy your logic but then again, I have no interest in what you do with your therapy. I would just point out that I remember many of the things you've posted in the past months, and it wasn't even that long ago you were insisting you didn't have DID and your last therapist didn't know what she was doing either. And now you're taking the position that you don't want your DID to change.

In your past therapy, you also repeatedly refused to follow suggestions your other therapist would make. Same reactions to your postings (by other posters) as in this one-- your therapist is crazy, she doesn't know what she's doing, etc. You are very talented in portraying your therapists as nincompoops.

With your last therapist, you would agree to try her approach, and it would help you make progress and accept a certain understanding of your life. It seemed to me that you made enormous progress away from a very painful place. Given the past history, I think it makes sense to at least consider trying what your therapist recommends. It's worked in the past, big time. The emphasis is on "try", see what happens. I think you are always afraid of change. Not sure that serves you, and perhaps exploring your reasons in therapy would be useful.

I'm not interested in telling you that you have to do therapy a certain way. I'm also not interested in arguing with you or making you feel bad about whatever choice you do make. I'd just encourage you to not make any decisions that foreclose possibilities, and discuss your concerns with your therapist. As you've said, this is your only option for right now. Either make good use of the therapy or don't, and perhaps try not to fall through the same trap door over and over. Good luck.

My understanding is that more current thinking around DID treatment does NOT push for integration, but rather, cooperation, communication, and collaboration among the parts/alters, so that your system function better as....well...a system. While integration CAN happen, it's not something you can or should force, as it can end up being more like (being experienced as) a "deletion" of a part/alter than an integration. Sometimes parts can and will age progress, and sometimes not, but this is something that just happens in the course of treatment, not something you can make happen. This approach to DID takes into account that parts exist for a reason and that they have a right to exist if that's what they/you want. Many times, people with DID and/or their parts have no interest in integrating and therapists who push for it are not respecting client autonomy.

Just adding another perspective to the conversation...

Dnester first take some time to breath and relax.

I have heard of this happening its not the old version of hypnosis you see on tv or in these proven to be false movies and tv series. and books.

sometimes people with DID have done so much work on their self and their problems with other therapists and have done so much research that the two things together have caused a "natural" integration where a "system" in terms of DID no longer exist but the alters are still more defined/ separated. sometimes doing imagery (the new term for hypnosis in some locations) can help.

Dnester you have done therapy work for a while on all kinds of things according to your past posts, not always with the same therapists over the years and not all at once and not always on DID.

therapy for dissociation problems isnt just about DID and alters, its about all kinds of things things you have already worked on according to your past posts. for a moment throw out the diagnosis label and think instead about how much you now you about and can do to take care of your self and your problems... you obviously can use a computer so that right there says you can read write type, operate devices, the things you have posted about in various forums shows you know how to take care of your self and your daily life.

you have also posted researching and questions and gotten answers to thosemany in depth questions.

all these things go together to where you may in fact not have a "system" but still have alters that are separated from your main personality still.

Im guessing no one has explained what a "System" is in DID. you know how my posts say though DID causes problems in a persons life in all areas of a persons life but DID is consistent.

a "system" in DID is what gives that consistency. a DID system is where every single time the same alter comes out/ takes control it is because of the same trigger. Every time an alter comes out the same identical behaviors happen, each time the same alter talks with the therapist they have the same beliefs, thoughts and actions. the alter is connected in a certain way to the other alters and to the one they reside with in.

example ...

Rainy...every time there was a rain storm she was the one that took control. her thoughts behaviors, actions was all about the same thing, doing what was needed to get safe and dry and comfortable during a rain storm. She took control during therapy only when there was a rain storm outside going on. discussions in therapy with her were about what she knew about being abused and having to find the way home during a rain storm and how she took care of things during a rain storm. she was connected to me because it was my dissociating during abuse that caused her. She was connected to other alters too in a special way.

a DID has consistancy and a special connection between each other. that consistency and connection is called a "system" (a way of doing things)

Some people with DID do not have a "system" they may have parts and alters but they dont have a System anymore.

how does this happen well as a person heals their non dissociative issues that in turn heals their dissociative issues too. its all one physical body and all one physical brain. the more you know the more and faster you heal.

think of it like high school math class. the first day you know nothing about high school math but then as you read the book, do some work suddenly in the middle of the year you look back at the first few pages in the book and wonder wow this used to be so hard for me, I used to not be able to do that.

having DID is like that, the more you are in therapy, no matter what you are in therapy for, and the more you research and ask questions and get answers to your questions the faster you heal.

Dnester you have done amazing work. it may not feel like work to you but look back at all your posts starting from the beginning and you will see your progress with how you healed just posting and replying. you have also been researching and attending therapy on and off during your life time..

I am not surprised that though you have alters still you do not have a "system" thats a great thing. it means you are very quickly entering a point where you will not have alters anymore.

the hypnosis.... someone posted they do not do that any more. no they do not do the kind of hypnosis that you see in books and movies any more.

the new name for this is called visualization, relaxation and meditation, and imagery. some locations still use the old wording especially when they are dealing with someone who is into researching and reading all kinds of books about mental problems. why because thats the word the books and movies use and thats what word is familiar to that person.

yes using relaxation and imagery and meditation can help those who have alters and parts but no system any more.

all the process requires you to do is sit quietly, close your eyes, breathing, meditaiton exercises and then .......imagine ......... what you think that alter or part looks like.

then ..........imagine ..............rescuing, holding or taking that alter or parts hand and ..........imagine..........leading them into the present where its safe.

(for those that want more information on this process its also called working with the inner child, and IFS therapy. you can find information about these in your local library, or in book stores or online book selling places.)

congrats on your progress and rate of progress dnestor. keep up the great work.

I was just going to comment on hypnosis before amandalouise made the great post above. Many people perceive hypnosis as something risky or threatening, mostly because of how it is often presented in fiction. It is not something esoteric and even weird, basically just a form of guided meditation. There really isn't any risk in trying it, the "worst" that can happen is that it has no effect and nothing happens or it may feel pointless.

I also share amandalouise's view that you have made great progress and within a pretty short period of time - just think back how you started "simply" wondering what causes your persistent impulses... You do seem to find therapists that sound a bit extreme (or at least they are presented in that way) but it is great that you are exploring and trying all these things. I don't have DID and am not very familiar with its treatment but hard to imagine anything bad or irreversible could happen in a hypnosis session, against your will.

I am still confused on the system thing. You mean they are alters but dont work together?
Would it be dangerous to do hypnosis to find out why they were created and when? Then work up to combining them and age progressing them?

Update: I talked to her on the phone about how to talk to the alters about why and when they came. She said if I dont hear from them yet thats not unusual it may just start with a feeling but she would teach me how to get in touch with them and I shouldnt need hypnosis for that. I was also wondering what if I want them to stay? I feel like they are my friends. I just dont like Thorne akaVeronica becsuse she is bad but I think integrating her would be a very bad idea. She is an alter for a reason. I cant handle her emotions.

Isn't it necessary for integration that everyone involved should cooperate and agree on trying it? I don't know, just a question that occurs to me. Also, I guess the idea is that the alters tend to be extreme and have so defined characteristics because the psyche is fragmented, and those feelings (and actions) would become less extreme in a construct where they become more balanced?

As far as there being a supportive reason why alters exist and that perhaps it is better that way - I guess that was the case originally when the initial traumas and dissociations happened. But if you are no longer in those situations and don't need to actively deal with similar things, perhaps it does not necessarily have a functional role to be divided?

I also wanted to add to the part where I said that you have come quite far, that you definitely seem quite functional in terms of being open to all sorts of feedback and considering it without getting defensive. I remember there were suggestions earlier on your threads that listening to all the different (and sometimes contradictory) opinions may not be a good idea and you should choose one standpoint and not discuss your issues so openly and publicly. For me, your openness and ability not to get defensive and attack people for presenting different opinions is a very healthy feature, one that probably helps you to uncover all these things and improve, try new things in spite of skepticism and current beliefs.

I second everything Amyjay said already. I also feel like this therapist watched/read Sybil too many times and thinks she's some sort of Dr. Wilbur. I seem to recall that Sybil was "integrated" at the end using hypnosis and age-progression. I've never heard of that sort of thing being employed for integration these days.