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Member
Member Since Mar 2018
Location: US
Posts: 31
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#1
Just a panicky post from me..
I have therapy (psychodynamic) in just over an hour and I have nothing to say I always tend to start the session, with ‘I don’t have anything today.’ This time I really do have nothing She’s not the type of therapist who will initiate things if I have nothing. It is ok for her that we sit in silence and let’s me know that, but understands it’s not ok for me. It’s not that I don’t want to go to session because of this: quite the opposite infact. But I always feel so desperate to break a silence. Or I’m mad at myself that I can’t ‘do therapy,’ or that I have this opportunity to work things out with an amazingly insightful therapist, but that can only happen if I come with the things. I’m attached. I can’t quit therapy. But I need to have something to say otherwise something bad will happen. Any advice? I just feel like a defected human |
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feileacan
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Poohbah
Member Since Sep 2016
Location: Europa
Posts: 1,169
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#2
Why not try to talk about whatever comes to your mind at that moment? What sensations or perceptions you have? Or how it is difficult for you to start talking about something when you think you have nothing to say? Why not talk about how you felt panicky before the session because you have nothing to say, she will let you sit in silence and how that's very hard for you?
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Blacky89
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Poohbah
Member Since Nov 2017
Location: United States
Posts: 1,332
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#3
My therapist is also psychodynamic. I’ve gone in before and said I was stressed out because I had nothing to say and talked about my feelings around that including how I felt like I couldn’t “do therapy.” He was extremely kind about it. You could say pretty much exactly what you said above.
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Blacky89
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#4
How did your session go?
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Jun 2018
Location: Somewhere
Posts: 3,355
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#5
If I told the therapist I had nothing to say, she'd probably kick me out. Last time I had trouble starting, she asked me why I had come if I wasn't going to talk. I thought that was sort of mean and didn't answer. Then she asked if C could be there instead, and that hurt my feelings, tbh. It was also a dumb question.
__________________ Life is hard. Then you die. Then they throw dirt in your face. -David Gerrold |
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Blacky89
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Anonymous45127
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Poohbah
Member Since Sep 2016
Location: Europa
Posts: 1,169
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#6
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Anonymous45127, susannahsays
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Jun 2018
Location: Somewhere
Posts: 3,355
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#7
Probably. Since C is the so-called "main person," she gets special privileges. Like sitting like a bump on a log. I don't think the therapist would ever ask her to let me come instead if she had nothing to say. No, never in a million years.
__________________ Life is hard. Then you die. Then they throw dirt in your face. -David Gerrold |
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Anonymous45127
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Member
Member Since Mar 2018
Location: US
Posts: 31
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#8
I started by saying ‘I’m full of nothingness,’ and she was lovely as always saying it’s never ‘nothingness’ to her and that she gets a sense of how difficult it is for me to bear silences and hopes that I’ll get to a place where it feels comfortable to be with her while having ‘nothing.’
It’s the thing I want most. I think silence connects people, when they fully allow to just ‘be’ in it.. so I hope so too. After that though, it turned out we did have something to talk about. Thank you for asking |
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Anonymous45127, Lrad123
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Member
Member Since Mar 2018
Location: US
Posts: 31
6 17 hugs
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#9
Quote:
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Anonymous45127, susannahsays
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