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Member
Member Since Jun 2018
Location: New York City
Posts: 210
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#1
Was he purposely being passive aggressive in that last line? He was “welcoming” you to remain silent and to suffer in silence. He should be encouraging the opposite. Maybe I’m just reading it wrong?
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koru_kiwi, malika138, unaluna
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Magnate
Member Since Jul 2013
Location: United States
Posts: 2,741
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#2
Quote:
I am very weirded out by the ending of his email. From what I can conclude is that he was somehow wounded by my original email to him and responded not from an adult place. __________________ When a child’s emotional needs are not met and a child is repeatedly hurt and abused, this deeply and profoundly affects the child’s development. Wanting those unmet childhood needs in adulthood. Looking for safety, protection, being cherished and loved can often be normal unmet needs in childhood, and the survivor searches for these in other adults. This can be where survivors search for mother and father figures. Transference issues in counseling can occur and this is normal for childhood abuse survivors. |
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unaluna
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koru_kiwi
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Member
Member Since Jun 2018
Location: New York City
Posts: 210
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#3
I know you’re hurting right now, but he needs to be called out on this. That reply was NOT good enough. How can a mental health professional not understand an eating disorder for a year-and-a-half? You mentioned b/p cycles. That’s not the behavior of a non-eating disordered person. And honestly, I would flat out ask him, “are you actually giving me the green light to suffer in silence?”
Bottom line — you’re the patient - he’s the professional and should act like it. |
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Magnate
Member Since Jul 2013
Location: United States
Posts: 2,741
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#4
Quote:
__________________ When a child’s emotional needs are not met and a child is repeatedly hurt and abused, this deeply and profoundly affects the child’s development. Wanting those unmet childhood needs in adulthood. Looking for safety, protection, being cherished and loved can often be normal unmet needs in childhood, and the survivor searches for these in other adults. This can be where survivors search for mother and father figures. Transference issues in counseling can occur and this is normal for childhood abuse survivors. |
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Elder Harridan x-hankster
Member Since Jun 2011
Location: Milan/Michigan
Posts: 40,019
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#5
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ArtleyWilkins
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Magnate
Member Since Oct 2018
Location: USA
Posts: 2,788
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#6
I agree. Too much room for miscommunication (which may be what is already going on). Need to speak at least over the phone (better in person) where you can have a dialogue, hear voice inflection, ask questions, clarify.
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Member
Member Since Jun 2018
Location: New York City
Posts: 210
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#7
I wouldn’t worry about being compassionate toward him - it’s not your responsibility to look out for his feelings. Professional - okay, but if it were me I wouldn’t spare him my dismay.
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