[Lonelyinmyheart]

My t uses whatsapp and it's really helping me well she's on a break as I can see when she's last been online. I like it because I know she's out there even though she's a long way away.

I wouldn't be able to mention this at all. I feel really embarrassed about looking. I think I have this fear that if I told her she would be horrified and block me.

Does anyone else do this? Does it seem kind of stalkerish?

[CartDown]

I do this with my T's Facebook profile. He knows I look him up when I feel the need for connection and, thankfully, he doesn't seem bothered by it.

It's ok, I get it.

[Rive.]

I don't think it's stalkerish. You are just checking her online status... and merely wanting to feel the connection in-between sessions. Which, to me, seems pretty harmless.

[seeker33]

I think it's very common and many people (not just those in therapy) do similar things.

[NP_Complete]

I recently installed whatsapp and noticed that my therapist was on my list of contacts. The next session I asked him to block me, not because I would be tempted to contact him on there, but to preempt him blocking me and getting my feelings hurt. He thought my request was really interesting and wanted to explore it further. I told him it was simple. I'd rather him reject me on my terms than on his. Like you, I would definitely check his online status if it was available to me. We once did a video call over Google Hangouts and I could see his online status for several weeks after and found it comforting. Then he blocked me and I felt really hurt. I understand why he did it, but it still hurt.

[Taylor27]

I have once in a while checked my t face book page, i have never mentioned it to her. The clinic has very strong boundaries around face book with clients ect. I would be devasted if she had to terminate me because of this. I take comfort in looking sometimes hugs

[Lonelyinmyheart]

Originally Posted by NP_Complete

I recently installed whatsapp and noticed that my therapist was on my list of contacts. The next session I asked him to block me, not because I would be tempted to contact him on there, but to preempt him blocking me and getting my feelings hurt. He thought my request was really interesting and wanted to explore it further. I told him it was simple. I'd rather him reject me on my terms than on his. Like you, I would definitely check his online status if it was available to me. We once did a video call over Google Hangouts and I could see his online status for several weeks after and found it comforting. Then he blocked me and I felt really hurt. I understand why he did it, but it still hurt.

I really get this. It's that constant fear that you're going to encroach on the therapists boundaries and get rejected. My t is the safest, kindest and most open t I've known, but I still panic about this. I havent wanted to mention checking her status though, I'm too scared to lose it. I'm really sorry that your t blocked you. I can understand how devastating that must have been as I would feel the same regardless of what makes sense logically.

[Lonelyinmyheart]

Originally Posted by Cheryl27

I have once in a while checked my t face book page, i have never mentioned it to her. The clinic has very strong boundaries around face book with clients ect. I would be devasted if she had to terminate me because of this. I take comfort in looking sometimes hugs

Yep, I've done this as well. I don't look very often though because I can see her friends list and I don't really want to know who's on there in case I see family members etc. I would find that too upsetting to deal with. But looking at her whatsapp status is definitely a comfort thing for me.

[susannahsays]

Nah, I don't really think it's stalkerish. She could change her privacy settings if she wanted to restrict that information or hide it completely. Or she could get a free Google voice number to give clients instead of her personal number.

[nottrustin]

Originally Posted by susannahsays

Nah, I don't really think it's stalkerish. She could change her privacy settings if she wanted to restrict that information or hide it completely. Or she could get a free Google voice number to give clients instead of her personal number.

How does google voice work? I realized last week T uses it and am curious.

[susannahsays]

Originally Posted by nottrustin

How does google voice work? I realized last week T uses it and am curious.

You can just download the app and get a free number with whatever area code you want with your google account. Has text and voice functionality.