[junkDNA]

My therapist has suddenly started crying and tearing up in sessions

I've been working with him for 9 years. This is a new thing. I've suspected him of tearing up before, but he has definitely cried/teared up more recently than ever

I am wondering why my therapist is suddenly being so emotional in my therapy. Of course I could ask and I suspect these types of responses To my thread

However I'm just writing about it to process within my own mind , it helps to see my thoughts put into words. I appreciate feedback, but am reluctant to ask my therapist about his tears at this time. Perhaps further down the line I will.

I feel quite awkward about it , and I feel like he may be crying because he knows i am a hopeless case. As If he is grieving my existence

[pianolady]

† would really worry me. The thing is, if she is doing this, it means whatever you are saying so psetting. need someone who is rock-solid, who would not be shocked by anything I said.

[hopealwayz]

I would be concerned too. I think that the concern about the tears has a potential to effect topics that you want to discuss. I’ve never had that happen to me but I imagine that it is confusing when it happens.

[LonesomeTonight]

I would wonder if there was something going on in his personal life that's leading him to be particularly emotional. Or maybe his professional life, like if he recently lost a client.

Do you cry in sessions?

[coolibrarian]

Your T crying may have nothing to do with you. He may be thinking of another client, or a relative or other loved one, who is having issues. HOWEVER, since it seems to be affecting you, THAT has to do with you. If I were you, I'd mention it to him. See what he says. I'd also like to know if he is fully present in the room with you, while he is crying. Because, if not, that would affect you, too.

[Out There]

It may be something else for him and I'm sorry it's making you feel like this. Many , many things contribute to how someone is feeling and how we feel is extremely complex. It would be easy to be with someone doing this and relate it entirely to ourselves. It's good to recognize what you are feeling , then to recognize that our feelings aren't always rational , then to recognize the counter thought that this is probably not the case or true which then puts us more in in our centre and balance. I know people who write this in columns on paper , this side the feeling , this side the counter to the feeling , then keep it with them to look at and remind them to ground. I know how difficult this is , but try to take a moment to focus and see that your mind is going all over the place. What do I want right now ? I want my mind to be my best friend , not my worst enemy ( and we all know it can be both , don't we ?!! ) I hope I've made you smile a little and hopefully you feel a little better processing this with us here. Hugs JD

[Salmon77]

Unless you are doing something differently than usual, my guess would be that something is going on in his personal life that is making him extra emotional. He could have a sick/dying family member, for example.

Even if you're reluctant to ask him, if it's bothering you and you worry that it's about you, I think it's worth just saying, "hey, I don't need the details, but is something going on?" I had a similar conversation with my T recently when he seemed "off" for a few days.

[junkDNA]

Originally Posted by comrademoomoo

Do you cry in sessions?

Yeah quite a bit recently

[junkDNA]

Well I did see something recently that made me think his father might have cancer.

[Taylor27]

My guess is something is going on in his personal life. My psychologist who i saw up to this past May cried the last 4 sessions leading up to his retiring. It really bothered me because i was not showing any emotions and it was uncomfortable Also he cried every time he was trying to end things with me. I had other t who have cried when i have explained something about my past and thats been okay by me, it felt like i could be more open and honest with them. You could always ask him if something is going on? Hugs

[feralkittymom]

It's understandable to take it personally in a negative way. And it's possible there's something difficult going on in his personal life. But it could also be personal in a positive way: that being a new father, he sees your pain and hears it through a deeper level of empathy than he had ever experienced prior to becoming a father himself. That having his own child has opened up empathic capacities he couldn't experience before, and he's bringing that to your therapy.

[toomanycats]

Hmm. Perhaps he's going through something that's making him more emotional?
Perhaps he is hoping the vulnerability will add to the therapy - maybe even was recently trained to be MORE open or something with these things.

[toomanycats]

ohhh yeah what feralkitty says
The way I feel about other people's pain has changed drastically since becoming a mom and continues to change as my daughter ages.
Never ever before did I used to feel maternal protection towards peers -- but I do now.
Never ever did I feel an intense desire to be able to somehow magically be one of my group therapy folks' moms, but that happened for sure now that I'm a mom.

I also cry SO MUCH more easily now. I never cried in front of people before, but I cannot stop myself anymore.

[susannahsays]

As others have said, I think it's something to do with him and not you. Maybe he has something going on that is taking an emotional toll. I think you've also mentioned before that he has bipolar disorder or something. Could be he's had a med adjustment or something that has caused a fluctuation in mood and some weepiness.

Whatever it is, I really doubt that it's because he thinks you're a hopeless case or whatever.

[junkDNA]

Originally Posted by feralkittymom

It's understandable to take it personally in a negative way. And it's possible there's something difficult going on in his personal life. But it could also be personal in a positive way: that being a new father, he sees your pain and hears it through a deeper level of empathy than he had ever experienced prior to becoming a father himself. That having his own child has opened up empathic capacities he couldn't experience before, and he's bringing that to your therapy.

Thank you for pointing that out. I always immediate go to the negative .

I have considered this as well... him being a new father. Especially since we have been discussing my csa and neglect . It seems to correlate to my talking about the abuse

[Lonelyinmyheart]

I suppose the main issue is how comfortable you are with it. I know it would be near on impossible to tell T if you're not, though. I don't think I could. It does sound like he's emotional due to stuff in his life. In your position, I think I'd be questioning how it impacts on me in the room. I'm not very good with tears full stop and would find it a significant problem, but for some it may feel validating like the T is fully empathising. I hope at some point it may be possible to talk to T about his emotions in the room and what it's like for you.

[junkDNA]

Originally Posted by Lonelyinmyheart

I suppose the main issue is how comfortable you are with it. I know it would be near on impossible to tell T if you're not, though. I don't think I could. It does sound like he's emotional due to stuff in his life. In your position, I think I'd be questioning how it impacts on me in the room. I'm not very good with tears full stop and would find it a significant problem, but for some it may feel validating like the T is fully empathising. I hope at some point it may be possible to talk to T about his emotions in the room and what it's like for you.

Yea I'm not opposed to bringing it up. But I feel its something that needs to be done later. It's not upsetting to me. Just a bit awkward for me as I dont do very well with others displays of emotion