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Magnate
Member Since Apr 2018
Location: UK
Posts: 2,162
6 1,834 hugs
given |
#61
Is this just a waste of f***ing time?
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chihirochild, Lemoncake, Lonelyinmyheart, LonesomeTonight, Out There, SlumberKitty, WarmFuzzySocks
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Guest
Posts: n/a
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#62
I can't say enough times how sorry I am for what happened yesterday, for hurting you. I am going to sit down after work today and write about it and hopefully use this experience to learn from, grow from. I can't undo the hurt I caused. All I can do now is move forward and hopefully be a better person. I love you so much and I always will.
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Lonelyinmyheart, Out There, SlumberKitty
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Tweaky Dog
Member Since Aug 2011
Location: England
Posts: 4,839
12 3,162 hugs
given |
#63
I won a writing competition today - don't think I've had that experience since I was a kid. Feels pretty good.
__________________ 'Somewhere up above the great divide Where the sky is wide, and the clouds are few A man can see his way clear to the light 'You have all the grace you need for today, and today is all that matters.' - Steve Austin |
chihirochild, Lemoncake, Out There, SlumberKitty
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Lonelyinmyheart, LonesomeTonight, NP_Complete
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Guest
Posts: n/a
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#64
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SlumberKitty
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Guest
Posts: n/a
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#65
Thank you for calling me. (My email was pathetic, though.)
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Lonelyinmyheart, LonesomeTonight, Out There, SlumberKitty
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Poohbah
Member Since Jun 2019
Location: Earth
Posts: 1,093
4 1,732 hugs
given |
#66
I'm feeling incredibly low. I know part of it is SAD again due to the weather, but also being physically worse which messes with my emotions. I just feel so empty, like my life is useless. I feel so lonely inside too. Im not sure if that will ever change. I can't imagine living with someone again after so long and I have no desire to find a relationship. I just miss you T, but don't feel able to text because the more vulnerable I feel, the harder it seems it is to make contact with you. I think I need to cry it all out but I wish I was with you.
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LonesomeTonight, Out There, SlumberKitty
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Roses are falling.
Member Since May 2017
Location: Seattle.
Posts: 9,779
(SuperPoster!)
7 10.2k hugs
given |
#67
I start my new block for peds on monday, and according to the 6th year students even the the classes for that aren't exactly as how they're written on our timetable.
For onco we were also told different times to come in depending on the lead teachers preferences. It could be a 2 hour class- 3 no idea. Think it's a good time to take a break anyway. P.s I'm still mad at you for going away. __________________ |
Out There, SlumberKitty
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Jan 2014
Location: n/a
Posts: 4,819
10 375 hugs
given |
#68
Please let this be the one weekend you check your work phone.
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LonesomeTonight, Out There, SlumberKitty
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Always in This Twilight
Member Since Feb 2015
Location: US
Posts: 20,877
(SuperPoster!)
9 75.1k hugs
given |
#69
Dear T,
Really struggling with the stuff with D...last night was a rough night. I could have emailed you, but then I wasn't sure what you could say that would help? Beyond what you'd said in session. I wish one of the T's would get back to me about a possible appointment for her. Maybe I need to contact some others....I just don't want every night to be like that. I need sleep. H needs sleep. D needs sleep. Love, LT |
Anonymous43207, Out There, SlumberKitty
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Member
Member Since Sep 2019
Location: Europe
Posts: 120
4 84 hugs
given |
#70
I will probably never say it, but - sometimes, you look so sad yourself. If I were to describe how it honestly feels to me, I would say you look as if (a part of) you died inside. It seems like a deep pain that has gone numb that can never be undone.
(Sometimes you look alive, caught up in something, and loving, too - that's where my feelings begin) |
Out There, SlumberKitty
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Guest
Posts: n/a
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#71
I just realized something. the disaster that was my session yesterday did do one thing. it solidified in my mind that I don't want to do this anymore. I agreed to come next week to talk about my pathetic email because I need to try to put some closure to the past 8 years. I want a freaking do-over of yesterday!! I have no desire whatever to do therapy about our relationship. No. I have spent enough money on this. 7 of the 8 years I have been paying out of pocket and that's a lot of money. I will come next week and seek closure but that is all. I wish you would get supervision for this. I really do.
Last edited by Anonymous43207; Oct 11, 2019 at 08:42 PM.. |
Lonelyinmyheart, LonesomeTonight, Out There, SlumberKitty
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Child of a lesser god
Member Since Jun 2015
Location: Tartarus
Posts: 19,175
(SuperPoster!)
8 12.4k hugs
given |
#72
Dear Info,
You’re right, I just have to shake my head at their stupidity and self-delusion and remember it is not my problem. It’s just I hate needless idiocy. ATAT |
Lonelyinmyheart, Out There, SlumberKitty, WarmFuzzySocks
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Guest
Posts: n/a
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#73
I wonder how much of this goes back to that "You don't know me" comment you made months ago. I am thinking that is where the erosion started. I never quite got over it.
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LonesomeTonight, SlumberKitty
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Elder
Member Since Jan 2010
Location: Where? US
Posts: 5,621
14 101 hugs
given |
#74
I need you! I'm sorry I didn't answer. Help me get a med provider, there's a problem with Vraylar!!
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SlumberKitty
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Jun 2018
Location: Somewhere
Posts: 3,355
5 1 hugs
given |
#75
I can't believe you suggested I go to the bacon festival. What's wrong with you!
__________________ Life is hard. Then you die. Then they throw dirt in your face. -David Gerrold |
Lonelyinmyheart, SlumberKitty, unaluna
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LonesomeTonight
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Elder
Member Since Oct 2008
Posts: 7,361
15 25 hugs
given |
#76
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SlumberKitty
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Guest
Posts: n/a
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#77
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SlumberKitty
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Child of a lesser god
Member Since Jun 2015
Location: Tartarus
Posts: 19,175
(SuperPoster!)
8 12.4k hugs
given |
#78
Dear Info,
I think we need to have another talk about that person next time. I know how to deal with malignant narcissists (flee). How do you deal with a narcissist who isn’t malignant because they’re just too damn self-absorbed to have any kind of intentions towards other people? Maybe things will settle down with them before I see you again. And I do have four days off. ATAT |
Lemoncake, SlumberKitty, WarmFuzzySocks
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Anonymous45127
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Grand Poohbah
Member Since Jan 2017
Location: Here
Posts: 1,731
7 1,505 hugs
given |
#79
Happy Birthday! I love you
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Lemoncake, SlumberKitty, unaluna, WarmFuzzySocks
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Anonymous45127
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Member
Member Since Apr 2017
Location: Parts Unknown
Posts: 333
7 77 hugs
given |
#80
Dear T,
Sometimes I worry that I feel too much when it comes to you. I know if I let myself I would be overwhelmed with my feelings and would struggle with depending on you too much.... Sometimes it’s hard to keep this balance and I just want to let go and feel all the feelings for you. Ugh. Life is hard. |
Lonelyinmyheart, LonesomeTonight, SlumberKitty
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