[fionella]

I have exams coming up in about a week, but I haven’t studied a thing because I feel too depressed and can’t concentrate. I am already in therapy because of it and I just had an appointment last week. My therapist said that I could always reach out to him through text or email, but I don’t dare to do this because I’m worried I might become too attached. I’ve read about this thing called transference which I think I’m experiencing because I also can’t stop thinking about him ..

How do I stop this and how can I concentrate ?

[velcro003]

Are you on any medication for your depression? That might help with the lack of concentration. Transference can happen, but it isn't always necessarily a bad thing, or doesn't always happen. I am free to contact my T out of session, and when I am doing poorly, I do. It has not made me any more attached than I was. Maybe try writing an email to see if it helps you, or talk to your T about it ahead of time and say you are afraid of becoming too attached and see what she says?

[wotchermuggle]

I’m not a mind over matter type of person generally but when it comes to doing things that you don’t want to, often the best thing is just to do them to get them over with. Look at it as a positive that you have something to distract yourself with for a few days.

[guilloche]

Sometimes just getting started on another task can help. Like, if I'm stressed and overthinking... the task (studying for exams) seems impossible or I feel like I can't possibly break myself out of the cycle, but honestly, sometimes just doing the tiniest bit... helps me refocus on the new task and pause the thinking/worrying.

Can you break down your studying into tiny, manageable bits? What do you need to do? Do you need to finish some reading? Or review your notes? Or create notes to study from? Can you pick one thing, and just set a timer, and do it for like... 5 minutes. Something super manageable?

It *might* be enough.

Sometimes, I also find switching modalities - so doing something physical instead of mental, to be a nice way to help break out of whatever's going on in my head. Take a walk, go to the gym, or even doing chores/washing dishes. Maybe yoga?

I think for me the key is something that is engaging enough that it temporarily distracts me from whatever I'm thinking/feeling, so that I then have a little space to change directions.

*hugs* When do you see your T next? Good luck!