[scarcejoy]

I have been working with my therapist for a year and I have not learned a thing from him. He is not rude or done anything grossly unprofessional. He does not judge and is good when I have to vent. The problem is that most of the time he just listens. He does not ask me questions or says things that allow me to explore my issues further. I have not learned about a single coping mechanism. I don't feel emotionally supported. He does not show empathy often. My therapist does not challenge me to do better. I see him every 2 weeks (that's the best I can do at the moment) and I don't miss him the week I don't see him. I don't look forward to our sessions. I have to ask him to speak and ask me questions. Then he asks me if I'm angry at him. I don't feel cared for. Now I have to do a lot of hard thinking about my issues and try to explore them further on my own because none of that is happening in the session. I have decreased my sessions from an hour to 30 minutes because I don't think that is worth an hour of my time.

I tried not to compare my current t to my previous for the first 5 months but it has been difficult to avoid that as of late. The previous therapist that I worked with for 3 years made me feel really safe in session. I felt so cared for but at the same time, we worked a lot on my issues. She asked me questions that made me think critically which allowed further exploration of my issues. For the past month, I think about my previous t after my sessions with current t. I think about the class of therapist that I used to work with. We had to stop working due to her moving away. When I talk about an issue with current t, he justs listens like if it were storytime. He asks questions sometimes like "what happened next?" or "how did you feel?" but nothing that actually makes me think. There is a number of things that I want to change in my life. One of them is working with a therapist that cares for me, makes me feel safe, challenges me, and pushes me to do better. I miss having someone like that in my corner and rooting for me.

[Rive.]

This T does not seem to be a good fit for you.

Over a year is a long time to stick with someone who is not helping. Do you intend to keep working with him? It might be worth shopping around for other, more useful, Ts.

[Omers]

I agree with Rive, if you are able I would start looking for a new T. This doesn’t sound like a problem because you are still attached to old T or because you are comparing T’s... it just sounds like a bad fit.