Is there something malicious about my T?

I know this sounds silly, but I read this book a few years ago called The Sociopath Next Door and a lot of the stuff I read kinda fits my T. I mentioned some things she’s done in another thread of mine but today she did something else that was bizarre.

She said to me today “Your insurance called, and they want to talk to me, so I’m going to call them tomorrow, but I don’t want you to worry about it.”

Ok, then Why not wait until AFTER you call the insurance company to tell me you had talked to them? She knows how bad my anxiety is and how badly I stress over things like this. She literally needed zero information from me. All she did was spark anxiety. Plus she told me right at the start of my session so I shut down for the whole thing.

Does anyone else find this odd? I didn’t even think much about it until my mom said “I don’t know why she’s telling you that.”

Personally I like to give most people the benefit of the doubt and just assume they are stupid. At the very least she, IMO, she is working hard to prove she has no business being a T.

As far as I know, my therapist always tells me when he's gotten notification that he needs to talk my insurance company into continuing our sessions. Sounds like she's keeping everything out in the open about what's going on. Would you feel better if they had already talked and there was a problem and you knew nothing about it?

It's my humble opinion that every human being on the face of the planet is completely unglued at this time. I'm serious.

I suppose it is considered "proper business" to let you know about your insurance contacting her. But then...isn't therapy supposed to reduce stress?

Frankly, I'm beginning to wonder.

Md I definitely encourage you to discuss these subjects of late with your therapist. Truthfully, she may not be aware of her behaviors.

This ^^^^^ 100% this!

Because some people might be pissed off if they found out after the fact that their therapist had some sort of consultation with their insurance company and didn't tell them about it. I would find it patronizing if a therapist didn't tell me if there might be an issue and she had to talk to my insurance company simply because she's aware telling me might cause me anxiety.

Sounds like she's just being upfront about it.

I agree.

Sounds pretty normal to me. About once a year my therapist let me know that he was contacted by insurance just to confirm need for continuation of services. It is a normal business process with insurance, and I think your T is just letting you know in advance that it will be happening but that it is very routine.

My T always tells me when she has needed to have contact with the insurance people. Maybe some T's think its good practise to be upfront about that.

I don't see anything malicious in that. She wanted to keep you informed rather than go behind your back to talk to your insurance. She did the ethical and professional thing here.

I would also be wary of diagnosing other people from reading books or whatnot. It's a bit of a far reach to diagnose your T as a sociopath as a result.

My T always tells me about anytime she talks to anybody else about me. If it is something that is planned, she tells me ahead of time. She believes in being completely transparent and disclosing this type of thing.

It is strange to me that you are tempted to describe your therapist's behaviour in such extreme ways. Sociopath and malicious are very dark words to use when what I read are descriptions of normal and mundane behaviours - in this case, even professional and transparent. Have you given any thought as to what is driving you to want to suspect your therapist of carrying out nefarious acts? I am often keen to see my therapist as being unboundaried and out of control. Sometimes she is, but sometimes my understanding of her behaviour is one of my projections about myself - my fear of being out of control. Maybe something like this is happening (I am not suggesting you are projecting your sociopathic desires onto her!).

I think there is nothing to worry about. I'd be greatful that she informs you when anyone contacts her about you.

That doesnt sound odd at all to me, but i dont know your therapist.

I have to agree, I've seen several posts from you (Mountaindewed) questioning whether your T has evil intentions towards you, based on behavior that seems pretty normal to me (if not always ideal). Might be good to spend some time thinking/talking about why you distrust her so much, whether that distrust might be something that's coming from you, rather than what she's doing.

I think that a good T, when deciding on the timing of sharing information with a client, will consider (among other things) the effect of that timing on the client.

Here, for example, OP says that the session was ruined for her because she was told something anxiety-provoking at the beginning of the session.

I think it is reasonable to ask whether T might have handled things differently, and better.

Asking that reasonable question is a world apart from wondering whether the therapist is a sociopath.

I think it is very reasonable to ask the T not to share such things in a session.

I'd prefer my T share something like this at the beginning of my session so there would be time to discuss it if i wanted to. I would not like to learn something possibly upsetting when Im leaving. Thats just how my mind works.

T and I were talking today about something random and she said “I can sometimes get really angry and I can get sometimes get really mean, but I don’t take it out on clients.”

At least today was good.

I think she thought it was important to inform you. I would be angry if I found out my T didn't inform me that something was going on with my insurance or anything else. I guess it's just a professional practice to let the client know that the provider has some communication about their case.

I think I’ve realized that she’s not malicious as in evil or sociopathic, but I think she can not be a very nice person at times. She seems to have a short temper with her family and can get angry easily. And at times just doesn’t seem to care about other things.