[Quanticia]

So, I just started therapy. The reason was that I remembered some bad stuff that happened to me long time ago. I wanted to get it off my chest and explore how it affects me now. Instead of that, we started by chatting on how my daily life is and what my daily troubles may be. Which I don't fully mind, but it feels like the issue that's nagging me will never get talked about unless it comes up naturally in the conversation. Which I doubt will happen. Is it just to get to know me better before touching the hard stuff? Do therapists work this way?

[ChickenNoodleSoup]

How did the conversation start?
For me personally, the first session my T and I talked about what I'm struggling with the most currently and he asked a few questions I don't remember much about, such as what I was studying. All sessions after that have started with my T asking a pretty open ended question implying that I can just talk about whatever I want to. I usually have a rough idea of what I want to discuss, but might first mention a few general life updates, if they are important. My T usually doesn't 'guide' the discussion. If I want to change topic, we can always do so. And we can discuss whatever I want to. But I have to bring it up, otherwise it's not talked about.

If you already feel comfortable to talk about deeper issues, I'd suggest you just say that you'd want to talk about whatever it may be. Lots of people might at first feel a bit uncomfortable though, maybe not trust the T completely (I for example took about half a year to actually really discuss anything related to trauma). So, your therapist might be trying to make you feel more at ease and get to know you a bit.

[MissUdy]

Yes they work this way sometimes. The therapist is getting to know you and what your life is like so they can help you as best they can. Trauma can have completely different effects on people, so it’s important to figure out which parts of your life are affected and need work.

Although a good therapist will not usually bring up traumatic experience first, you will have to tell them, however you feel is best. I’ve been with the same therapist for 4 years and there’s some experiences I have still not shared.

[susannahsays]

Originally Posted by Quanticia

it feels like the issue that's nagging me will never get talked about unless it comes up naturally in the conversation

That's only true if you choose not to bring it up yourself.

[JeannaF]

When I started, I had to fill in a form describing my main issues. Did you have to do anything like that?

[Quanticia]

Thank you for your replies, everyone!

Originally Posted by JeannaF

When I started, I had to fill in a form describing my main issues. Did you have to do anything like that?

No, not at all.

[Omers]

How many sessions have you had? My T does both but he is hesitant to bring anything up before the client does as he does not want them feeling pressured. He did ask the very first session “what brings you to therapy” and I think my answer let him know where my boundaries were talking to a T I didn’t know yet.

[Rive.]

That depends on their orientation. Also, if it's your first session they will ask more general questions to get to know you.

From then on, it's up to you to direct the session(s). If you want to talk about that topic or any other "hard stuff", just bring it up. Ts will generally follow the client's lead.