[Toughcooki]

So I've been assigned a new doctor for counseling, and I know nothing about him, and I'm worried that the first appointment is going to be, "OK soooo why do you need to see me?" And I'll not know what to say.

[quietlylost]

There may be a chance that your previous provider has talked with this person or that the new person can view your records. It can also help in advance of the appointment to write some things down to make sure you have some ideas of what to talk about and what to express that's important for the new provider to know.

New provider changes suck. I had one last year and it was terrifying.

[MuddyBoots]

That's usually how it's been for me, so you might want to think about that and write some things down, maybe make a list or chart or map of sorts and bring it to the appointment.

[Toughcooki]

It's a video appointment. I'll try to write some stuff down. I usually bring lists to dr appts since I forget my issues, lol, and that's for physical health stuff. Harder to remember mental health stuff since I tend to 'forget' everything. Which I guess is an advanced form of stuffing, haha.

[Toughcooki]

My first male T. And he was the nicest, most caring, interested in figuring out what's going on and fixing it, T I've experienced.
I'm already dreading the insurance transferring me away from him someday. LOL

[Toughcooki]

Still sort of reeling from the sheer impact of how KIND he was. I don't think I've ever met a kinder person in my life. I actually started crying lol bc he was speaking so kindly. Then we talked for 15 minutes about how I was feeling and what experiences I may have had that would cause me to react that way, etc. I wish I could talk to him 10 hours a day.

Edited because I have known lots of kind and loving people, but there was an additional *something* that I've never experienced from ANYONE. Something like - kindness and actually interested in me, not annoyed at all, not bored, at all, not judging me or anything - but interested and kind. Really kind. And interested. Not acting like he's interested because he's kind, but actually interested.

In a way it's heartbreaking to realize I've lived almost 50 years and never had anyone speak kindly, and be truly interested in what I was saying without an ulterior motive. (I've had PLENTY of men be interested in me, but they weren't interested in my personality, let's just say, and I can tell the difference)

[Restin]

ToughCooki, I also went through 40 or 50 years of toughing it in the real world before I started therapy. I discovered have an inner child part that sort of got left behind while my main self was trying to grow up so fast. My therapist and I are gradually looking into my inner child part and see how we can love and help her. T is the only one, like yours, who speaks kindly to me and her. He has no greed and doesn't try to lecture us. Yes, men (and women) out there in the world can be so cunning it's hard to trust anyone again. I hope you can stay with this T and see where your journey together takes you.

[Toughcooki]

Originally Posted by Restin

ToughCooki, I also went through 40 or 50 years of toughing it in the real world before I started therapy. I discovered have an inner child part that sort of got left behind while my main self was trying to grow up so fast. My therapist and I are gradually looking into my inner child part and see how we can love and help her. T is the only one, like yours, who speaks kindly to me and her. He has no greed and doesn't try to lecture us. Yes, men (and women) out there in the world can be so cunning it's hard to trust anyone again. I hope you can stay with this T and see where your journey together takes you.

Me too. I never had a lick of therapy until a few years ago and have just been struggling from 'Come on, heal faster!' T to 'You're fine, quit complaining' T for these past few years. He said that based on the little bit I've told him there should be no expectation that I should be able to resolve these issues in 8 sessions, that sort of thing makes sense for someone with one trauma, but as someone with a lifetime of trauma there's a lot to unpack and I have every right to ask for more help.
It's a little disconcerting, to tell the truth.