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Legendary Wise Elder
Mountaindewed
NoahsArk30
Member Since: Jun 2016
Location: Where the sidewalk ends
Posts: 35,842
(SuperPoster!)
8,655 hugs
given |
#661
I can’t tell if you don’t like me or if you just see things differently then I do. You confuse me sometimes.
__________________ Ridin' with Biden |
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LonesomeTonight, Lostislost, SlumberKitty
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Lostislost
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Legendary Wise Elder
Mountaindewed
NoahsArk30
Member Since: Jun 2016
Location: Where the sidewalk ends
Posts: 35,842
(SuperPoster!)
8,655 hugs
given |
#662
I hope that email I just sent doesn’t piss you off. I’m honestly contemplating terminating things to save my own mental health.
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LonesomeTonight, SlumberKitty
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Always in This Twilight
LonesomeTonight
has no updates.
Member Since: Feb 2015
Location: US
Posts: 20,699
(SuperPoster!)
74.8k hugs
given |
#663
Dear T,
It means a lot to me that you said if I opted to switch to 3 sessions next week that you'd "make time for me." That it may not be my preferred time slots, but you'd find the time. That means so much... And thanks for being open to my talking about my mixed feelings about your getting vaccinated tomorrow. You helped calm my fears. And I appreciated your saying that you felt a bit guilty for being eligible right now. And knowing you aren't totally changing your habits and precautions. I really do wonder where I rank in "clients you feel you could help more in person" in terms of when you start seeing clients in person again. I know from what you said that it would be at least 2 months from now. But I wonder if you'd let me come in, at least occasionally? With your trying to space out in-person clients, maybe even at least once every other week? I imagine you haven't figured any of it out yet, so it wouldn't do me any good to ask. Though part of me wants to be like, "Could I maybe at least see you once in person in that first month you see clients again?" I'd even be willing to come in at like 8 am or something. Be safe getting the vaccine.... Love you, LT |
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Lostislost, SlumberKitty
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Luna's offical mini me.
Lemoncake
Adult female human
Member Since: May 2017
Location: Cafe Nervosa.
Posts: 9,646
(SuperPoster!)
10.1k hugs
given |
#664
6th session without you tomorrow.
__________________ "Love, like life, flows Through the heart. Feel the thrill of the flow And say nothing." |
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LonesomeTonight, SlumberKitty
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Legendary
Victoria'smom
has no updates.
Member Since: Apr 2012
Location: Earth
Posts: 14,880
(SuperPoster!)
5,415 hugs
given |
#665
**** you for leaving. I was just getting comfortable.
__________________ Dx: Me- SzA Husband- Bipolar 1 Daughter- mood disorder+ Comfortable broken and happy "So I don't know why I'm tongue tied At the wrong time when I need this."- P!nk My blog |
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Elio, Lemoncake, LonesomeTonight, Lostislost, SlumberKitty
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Tweaky Dog
LostOnTheTrail
has no updates.
Member Since: Aug 2011
Location: England
Posts: 4,777
3,105 hugs
given |
#666
I made it through my work meeting. Now I'm not sure what to do with the rest of this weird anniversary. There's a stream of expletives on the tip of my tongue, but I can't voice them.
__________________ 'Somewhere up above the great divide Where the sky is wide, and the clouds are few A man can see his way clear to the light 'You have all the grace you need for today, and today is all that matters.' - Steve Austin |
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Lemoncake, LonesomeTonight, SlumberKitty
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Magnate
Rive.
has no updates.
Member Since: Sep 2013
Posts: 2,002
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#667
So. Where do we go from here?
The ball is in your court.. |
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LonesomeTonight, SlumberKitty
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Always in This Twilight
LonesomeTonight
has no updates.
Member Since: Feb 2015
Location: US
Posts: 20,699
(SuperPoster!)
74.8k hugs
given |
#668
Dear T,
I'm worried you'll have a bad reaction to the vaccine. I said it really quickly at the end of session yesterday, and you just said you hoped you didn't have a bad reaction, too. But I'm worried about it right now, even as I know you'll probably be fine. I thought about emailing you about next week's schedule, figuring you'd at least respond by tomorrow morning, and then I'd know you survived at least. But maybe I should just be direct regarding what I'm looking for...I wish I'd brought that part up a minute or two earlier, and then maybe I could have said, "Hey could you just send a quick email once you get the shot?" Or maybe that wouldn't have been good, because if you'd forgotten, I'd have worried something bad happened... If you were a friend or family member, I wouldn't even have to give any thought to this--I'd have just texted/messaged, "Hey, hope the shot went OK!" or "How'd the shot go?" But this feels different because you're my T. Eh, I'll probably send something. Even if you don't reply till tomorrow morning, better than wondering about it till Monday. Love, LT |
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Lemoncake, SlumberKitty
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Always in This Twilight
LonesomeTonight
has no updates.
Member Since: Feb 2015
Location: US
Posts: 20,699
(SuperPoster!)
74.8k hugs
given |
#669
Dear T,
Thanks for replying so quickly to my asking if the vaccination went OK. It meant a lot. Hope you have a restful weekend with few side effects. Love, LT |
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Lostislost, SlumberKitty
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Poohbah
Bipolarchic14
has no updates.
Member Since: Feb 2014
Location: Over there
Posts: 1,076
354 hugs
given |
#670
I am having really bad si again, I am losing my health insurance in 16 days. I think that’s it for me. I done with this life.
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LonesomeTonight, SlumberKitty
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Legendary Wise Elder
SlumberKitty
is staying stable.
Member Since: Jul 2018
Location: CA
Posts: 27,329
(SuperPoster!)
117.7k hugs
given |
#671
I'm massively frustrated.
__________________ Dum Spiro Spero IC XC NIKA |
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*Beth*, just2b, LonesomeTonight, Lostislost
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Legendary Wise Elder
Mountaindewed
NoahsArk30
Member Since: Jun 2016
Location: Where the sidewalk ends
Posts: 35,842
(SuperPoster!)
8,655 hugs
given |
#672
I have no idea what’s going to happen on Tuesday when we meet. But I’m really worried. The last time this happened in 2015 I ended up IP after an overdose. I still believe you are not like that one therapist I had. But I’m worried you will just leave me hanging with no support when I really need it right now.
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*Beth*, LonesomeTonight, Lostislost, SlumberKitty
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Writing my way through...
ArtieTheSequal
is rediscovering her passion and purpose in life.
Member Since: Feb 2020
Location: In the desert
Posts: 7,158
(SuperPoster!)
5,710 hugs
given |
#673
No, I do not want a Hallmark movie. But, I have to admit, after you said that it felt good telling you not to be a smarta$$! Actually what it is, the reason I said that comment back to you, was because you were treading on the territory where you bring out the negative mother crap and I did NOT want that to happen.
I know life's not perfect; I've had 58 trips around the sun. But why is it so wrong for me to wish that my friends wouldn't be so hateful to each other?! And how can you not see that posting something about the karpman triangle and asking people if they recognize themselves in it would just cause MORE hateful posts? For pete's sake, woman, that would be taking the moral high ground way more than what i said about how during this time in our lives we need to love each other, not be hateful. Asking them to see where they fit on your precious triangle would be like preaching to them or something, dude. Oh man, I love you and stuff but you were way off base on that one. I'm thinking about it now and wondering how do you have any friends if you do stuff like that?! Last edited by ArtieTheSequal; Jan 15, 2021 at 08:36 PM.. |
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LonesomeTonight, SlumberKitty
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Magnate
chihirochild
is trying
Member Since: Feb 2017
Location: North America
Posts: 2,360
4,865 hugs
given |
#674
Why didn't you answer my text?
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just2b, Lemoncake, LonesomeTonight, SlumberKitty
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...............
Elio
is not home, please leave a message at the
beep.... ... ... ...
Member Since: Sep 2006
Location: in my head
Posts: 2,906
8,745 hugs
given |
#675
Wishing you that thought. I wonder if we'll ever talk about it. I wonder if talking about it would cause a problem - would it be crossing a line?
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Lemoncake, LonesomeTonight, SlumberKitty
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Writing my way through...
ArtieTheSequal
is rediscovering her passion and purpose in life.
Member Since: Feb 2020
Location: In the desert
Posts: 7,158
(SuperPoster!)
5,710 hugs
given |
#676
I may take you up on a session mid-week if I can get off work early enough. I bawled so much today I didn't talk nearly as much as I wanted to.
Then again I'm starting to feel all mushy again though so maybe I'd better not. |
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LonesomeTonight, SlumberKitty
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Writing my way through...
ArtieTheSequal
is rediscovering her passion and purpose in life.
Member Since: Feb 2020
Location: In the desert
Posts: 7,158
(SuperPoster!)
5,710 hugs
given |
#677
nope, definitely need to stay away until next friday.
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just2b, LonesomeTonight, SlumberKitty
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catches the flowers
*Beth*
is practicing healthy breathing for brain, mind,
body, spirit.
Member Since: Jul 2019
Location: Downtown Vibes, California
Posts: 15,701
(SuperPoster!)
23.7k hugs
given |
#678
Thank you.
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SlumberKitty
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Veteran Member
just2b
deleted
Member Since: Nov 2009
Location: SpACE
Posts: 597
141 hugs
given |
#679
before last session I thought that things were getting better. you said you would respond to me once a week to my check in emails and heard nothing from you all week. sometimes I have no idea why I ****en bother. sometimes I tell you how much I ****en hate myself and you dont even acknowledge it. is it because you think its from a younger part of me? and when I ... i said and wrote a lot because I feel that the once a month sessions were gettin to be to much , feeling like I am riped from you maybe was not the right way to say it. or maybe this attachment crap is just not worth it anymore. I feel that no one can mean what they say anymore. I dont trust you anymore. This past year has been ****. and feels like 2021 is no different. back to distancing myself from you. insomnia or poor quality sleep is a major problem and I cant' fix it. my agitation at night is turning over to the day. I hold it at times for the kids. they distract me really good. given time to myself like right now and I am so deep in a ****ing mood that I can say I hate you. I am angry at you. I dont trust you and it damn hurts. I think that my so called Anxiety Attack that at the time thought was a heart attack was because of thoughts I was having regarding you. I remember thinking that i felt like you would soon tell me you had it with me and could no longer help. and so into those kinds of thoughts, and feeling tired I tried to sleep. and suddenly I felt as though I was suffocating and could not breathe. my breath was felt shallow and slow and i was not trying to hold my breathe but it felt like it. and for some reason I felt like it was a heart attack. When clearly it was not had called 911 woke my kids checked out to be Anxiety ....or so i know it was. scared my kids
Maybe i want to much from you and I should just forget about therapy , and understand that childhood wants and needs ****EN WILL NEVER BE MEET. !! lLike anytime I start to feel something I have to tell myself NO. IT DAMN HURTS, i cant leave you you will have to leave me. however I will alway be looking for your exit. |
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LonesomeTonight, Lostislost, SlumberKitty
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Quietmind 2
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Tweaky Dog
LostOnTheTrail
has no updates.
Member Since: Aug 2011
Location: England
Posts: 4,777
3,105 hugs
given |
#680
Hi R,
I hope you don't mind that I've sent you another piece of artwork. It feels like the only way we can do that right now. I think it will be helpful in terms of before I did this, I felt...and after, I felt... I keep thinking there will be an end point to that series, but after nearly 5 years, I'm not seeing it. __________________ 'Somewhere up above the great divide Where the sky is wide, and the clouds are few A man can see his way clear to the light 'You have all the grace you need for today, and today is all that matters.' - Steve Austin |
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LonesomeTonight, SlumberKitty
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Quietmind 2
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