[junkDNA]

Hi everyone. It's been a while since I've been here, I check in every now and then but mostly stay quiet.

I'm here today because on a whim I contacted my old attorney that helped me with the civil lawsuit and mediation/settlement against my former therapist. (For background for those who don't know my story-

Possible trigger:

I was sexually abused and exploited by my former male therapist over a period of 2 years. He had been my therapist since I was 16, 7 years total. He also took me to men's houses that he found online on sex sites to watch these men have sex with me .

His license was revoked permanently. He surrendered his license to practice psychotherapy in leui of a trial with the Board of Psychology in my state. For the lawsuit, there was no litigation and the suit was settled during a mediation.

So one morning I'm thinking about my old attorney that helped me receive my settlement. I emailed her and inquired about all of my psychotherapy notes from my former T as well as all the hospitalizations I endured from age 15 to 23.

To my surprise she responded even though she has since retired from law. She remembered me. And she sent me everything.

These past few days I've binge read all of these documents . Obviously it has been very hard to read these things. But this letter that was written by my psychiatrist for the lawsuit is what sent me into the 'hole'. I'm going to share the letter, edited of names except for my own, which I am fine sharing .

Reading this description of my former therapist and his actions finally resonated inside me that I was targeted, groomed, abused, and taken advantage of. Seeing him described as a highly trained and skilled predator is in major conflict with my memories of him, like the letter states, I was profoundly confused.

I am still confused, but not as much. It has been a long time since this all occurred. But I finally feel this trauma is being healed. And the massive and overwhelming waves of grief are getting less and less.

And I know there is still hope for me.

[Quietmind 2]

You're incredible. Have followed your journey for some time

[SlumberKitty]

Yes, there is hope for you! You are strong and resilient. You are amazing!

[BarefootBeach]

I am relatively new here but wanted to say I am really sorry for what you went through. My heart goes out to you. It is a real accomplishment that this predator had his license taken. My ex-therapist told me he would have his revoked too if the State knew how he conducted "therapy" with me. I want to out him so badly, but am not able to right now. It infuriates me to know these animals exist preying on vulnerable people. I really believe they are evil. I need another therapist, but will never trust anyone in this field again, ever. Very damaging. I am glad you are moving forward. It is not easy at all, but very possible.

[junkDNA]

Originally Posted by BarefootBeach

I am relatively new here but wanted to say I am really sorry for what you went through. My heart goes out to you. It is a real accomplishment that this predator had his license taken. My ex-therapist told me he would have his revoked too if the State knew how he conducted "therapy" with me. I want to out him so badly, but am not able to right now. It infuriates me to know these animals exist preying on vulnerable people. I really believe they are evil. I need another therapist, but will never trust anyone in this field again, ever. Very damaging. I am glad you are moving forward. It is not easy at all, but very possible.

I'm sorry you know how it feels. I am thankful to have met my current therapist who has been working with me for 10 years. Its been a long hard road.

[here today]

This is such good news!

[Taylor27]

You are very strong and amazing. So proud of you. Hugs

[*Beth*]

What an awful thing to go through. You have my deepest respect, and admiration for remaining stable enough to see the lawsuit through.

[LonesomeTonight]

Your psychiatrist clearly had your back. But I can definitely see how painful and triggering it could be to see what they said in that letter. I hope you're able to process and talk this all through with your current therapist...