[emmaleemochizuki]

I realise that I don't share much of anything with my family or my closest friends, but I am slowly starting to share more with my T.

It's two completely different kinds of relationship, with my family and friends, it's personal. But my with my T is professional. I think they are both mutual, but with my T is more about me than it is about her.

[SlumberKitty]

It used to be that I shared more with my T but as I am healing more and more I am sharing more and more with my friends and family. Just my experience. YMMV.

[chihirochild]

I share more with my T, for sure. I don't want to burden my friends with the various things that cause me to suffer.

The problem with that pattern is that now it feels like my T is some sort of repository for my secrets, which makes it more difficult for me to think about separating from him.

[NP_Complete]

Originally Posted by chihirochild

The problem with that pattern is that now it feels like my T is some sort of repository for my secrets, which makes it more difficult for me to think about separating from him.

This is one thing I'm struggling with at the moment. My therapist was in my life when some pretty unpleasant stuff was happening and I feel like when he's gone, he won't be able to help me carry the burden of that stuff anymore. I don't want him to go.

[Lostislost]

I don't have that many friends, but honestly I don't feel like any of them care at all about my life. They might say they do at first, but they never help me or anything. They don't even remember important stuff I've told them. They all have their own problems. So T will always be the only one I can talk to.

[ScarletPimpernel]

I share much more with L than anyone else. Then again, I don't have any friends. I am starting to share more with my family. I don't think I can ever share as much with family as I do with L. L knows everything and is skilled with this stuff. My family tries to understand, but gets wrapped up in their own s***. My sister for example is more BPD than I am, and she's not in any treatment. I just can't share with her.

[zoiecat]

In the beginning I shared more with my T but as I learned more about myself (DID memory sharing), I started sharing with 2 of my closest friends. Now I definitely share more with my one closest friend. I leave my T out of the loop on some things but then again, he would probably not be interested in those things. He definitely is not interested in my day to day issues unless I share in a way that uses feeling words and am willing to work on how I can improve the situation or handle it better. He is all about progress and does not want to chit chat about a laundry list of day to day problems. I usually don't want to waste time working on how to better handle each little issue so that greatly reduces the time spent on those issues.

[nottrustin]

For the first few years I only talked to T. After a few years my best friend and another friend were very concerned about me. They thought I was getting worse and tried to convince me that therapy was causing more harm than benefit. 2 close friends had an "intervention". They were honestly concerned. I ended up telling my best friend that for the first time I had told anybody about my abuse and told her the basics of my abuse. I explained that the pain was horrific but T was amazing and helping me through it. From that point on I realized my friend accepted all my baggage and horrible secrets. So I don't tell her all the details and such but I am pretty open with her.

[emmaleemochizuki]

It's interesting how a lot of you said at first you talked more with your T, then eventually you start sharing with friends too.

I actually thought it was suppose to be the other way around, clearly I was wrong.

And maybe I will eventually learn that too. part of therapy is learning how to share things with others, and maintain human interaction, whether thats positive or negative things.

[stopdog]

I share a lot of things with my friends. I only told the therapist what I thought might be relevant to why I hired the woman.

[ArtleyWilkins]

I share differently. Friends aren't therapists. Therapists aren't friends. They serve different functions, so what we discuss is quite different.

[Mountaindewed]

I share more here on PC than anywhere else. Then I share the most with my T. I have one friend on Facebook who I message but I don’t share all that much with but she knows more then other people on Facebook do. If I did something real dumb I’ll share it here first then tell my T 24 hours later to avoid going to the hospital.

[*Beth*]

Hands down, I share far more with my therapist than I share with anyone else. Far more. Next to her I share here on PC. I have several friends of many, many years, but I share very little personal information with them. I don't even share that much with my husband, mostly because he's not supportive of the meds I need to be on.

[CharlieStarDust]

I learned the hard way that people in my life can’t handle what I have to say. So I share solely with my T. I’m very vague with my friends, but save the heavy existential stuff for therapy.

I share way more with my T than anyone. It's taken a lot of time and work to get here and it's brand new to me on some levels. Friends don't compare now.

[Taylor27]

I share more with my therapist. I do not have very many friends that i can really share with.

[ElectricManatee]

Originally Posted by ArtleyWilkins

I share differently. Friends aren't therapists. Therapists aren't friends. They serve different functions, so what we discuss is quite different.

Yes, this. I've shared bits of the deep, unpleasant stuff with my friends but only in a manageable, edited way. I don't hold back with my T, but I also don't talk much about likes and dislikes and day-to-day experiences the way I do with my friends.

[daisydid]

Similar to Artley, I share differently with family, friends, and my T. There are many things that happen in my day-to-day life that don't pertain to my therapy, and there are things that I experience that I wouldn't want to burden a friend with.

[WarmFuzzySocks]

For me what I share with t vs friends isn't necessarily more or less, just different. I've shared things with my t that I haven't told my friends and vice versa. It's just a different kind of conversation and processing.

[mugwort2]

Definitely my therapist. They are there for you to confide in them your most serious, relevant person I can confide in. I do tell my women and one male friend my feelings, my thoughts but I tell more of my emotions, thoughts to my therapist.

[ArtieTheSequal]

I think I share more completely with my t, than with my friends. Not necessarily different things, but more in depth with t. Something like that.

[sarahsweets]

Personally I am only able to have a couple of friends that are my closest. I have a lot of friends but it takes a good friend to really hear you and empathize with you, and being the closest friend(s) they love you .Personally I have found over time that it is a mistake to talk about such intimate things with many friends. The concentrated and genuine love I get from my closest friend is way more emotionally supportive to me then a group of people that may or may not think of me as their closest friend. I had a long term T that was very good to me. He was very gentle. But i never got it out of my head that I was paying him and that ultimately it was a professional relationship.

Because of my job I have to be fairly guarded so I do not share a lot of information even with friends. But i tell my therapist everything. She is the only one i truly trust. She knows the password on my phone and ipad. She gets into my purse to help me find things. She knows where things are in my house. I feel I trust her better than anyone else.