Couch 223: Jan 4: Darn Tootin'!

Happy Birthday, Chihiro!

Happy Birthday C!!

But symbols are not necessarily allegorical. Look it up.

I don’t know why I bother to make jokes here.

7 years of feast followed by 7 years of famine.

Whoa. You’re good. I didn’t even mention the cows and sheaves lining the hallway.

You were suggesting that something could be allegorical without being symbolic which is a categorical mistake. Of course something can be symbolic without being allegorical, that wasn't my point.

Anyway, don't be glum, chum. You are good at jokes. "Look it up" is a good joke. It implies I don't how metaphors work which is a rib-tickler for sure given my academic field.

I walked by a pet store earlier. Went in and looked at the animals up for adoption. Made me sadder about new cat and lone dog.

I know most people hugged my post last night, but it would be helpful to have some cheering comments back, if you can. Thanks.

Ah! Sweet. Only had to do 1 hour OT today. I feel like I got off work early after only 9 hours haha!

Happy Birthday, Chihiro!

Did your mother dognap them? I don't know the whole story, but I'd be pretty perturbed if my mother decided to keep my pets. She can get her own pets. If for whatever reason you can't get them back then feel free to go "shopping". There's plenty of dogs and cats out there needing a home. I'm sorry you're missing them though.

I even kind of get feeling a bit betrayed by the animals. I used to feel like a second class citizen in my own home with the dogs. Since my ex didn't work for many years, he spent a lot of time with the dogs and they sometimes seemed to like him better. I felt a little resentment at times, I must admit, towards both him for treating the dogs better than me, and the dogs for being more chummy with him.

I'm feeling angry towards my therapist since Thursday. About him leaving but also because he couldn't have a third session with me this week. I know it's ridiculous to be angry about that but I am. The anger was interfering with my work so I sent him an email about it Thursday mid-day. No response which is just making the anger fester even more. I didn't ask for a response, but it just feels like my anger is being unheard and ignored. I really want to cancel on him tomorrow. I've never cancelled on him though so I'm not sure what I'm going to do.

She didn't kidnap them and she'd give them up in a heartbeat if I could take them. We left for the long drive home and new cat started her respiratory distress thing that made me turn around last August and not drive to my mother's for the fall but spend it here. She was fine on the drive there in December.

So after half an hour, I knew I really couldn't risk having her like that for another 9 hours (the vet had advised me against traveling if this ever happened again), so I turned around and took her back to my mother's (we had discussed this possibility). Then lone dog and I left again.

And once lone dog realized new cat was not with us, he howled. And he howled. And he howled. And would not be comforted. So I turned around again. And as soon as he saw new cat he was happy again and stopped howling.

And now new cat is spending time on my mother's lap and sleeping with her, which she never did with me, and lone dog is having a blast in the local dog park. My mother's found a food that seems to have solved new cat's vomit problem. And my mother is happier, too, and her mind seems sharper with them there.

Her longtime cat died a bit over a year ago and when she finally was ready to adopt another, it turned out to have severe stomatitis and had to be euthanized within six weeks.

So no, I can't put new cat's health in jeopardy by traveling with her, and I can't hurt my mother's happiness and health, either, by taking her away, especially since new cat seems so happy with her. And no, I'm not ready to replace them.

I guess you guys don't understand. That's fine. But I'm in really bad shape and just saying something sympathetic could help me. I've already gotten the "but it's good for Mom!" from my sister and friends. I don't need that right now.

@@, you are kind and you are an excellent pet person. Your decision to let them stay makes me think it's about what's good for your mom? And that they are happy there with her. I agree with NP, if this is even semi-permanent bringing home a new new cat and/or another quiet dog might help.


There are lots more puppies and especially kittens this year because the spring shutdowns closed some of the feral spay and neuter programs, and there are pets out there who are delightful and well trained who've been surrendered because their families are struggling financially. You could give them an excellent home if you decide that will help with missing new cat and lone dog.


Most of all, though, a They are the delightful house companions they are because you care for them so well.

ATAT - I am sorry to hear of the pet situation. It is hard to do the best thing for them, which you have done. I had a cat/dog situation once where they couldn't be separated- except opposite - the dog stayed behind first and the cat became insanely depressed (I think - we didn't talk about it) and I had to take the cat to go live with her (my -ex) dog. So I do, in some albeit not all ways, understand how hard it is - for what that may be worth

Im glad np stepped up and asked you what happened. Maybe you told us before but it didnt register. What a sad ride home! Lone dog, what a traitor! But hed already experienced loss in his life, he wasnt going to stand for it again.

You know, this is a real story. I dont know what you want us to tell you, but i think you have more to tell us. Still, the little turncoats. Im just picturing psycho kitty with her little asthma inhaler. Boy she had lone dog whipped. Was she fighting you for alpha female in the house? Your mom lets her have that position?

I had a very bad relationship with one of my kittens, and it was just like the one between my mother and me. I dont like to talk about it.

Hugs, atat. I'm sorry about the pet situation too. I wish I knew the right things to say that could help.

@@, thanks for explaining the situation. It sounds like you did the best thing for everybody involved except for you. Sometimes it sucks to be selfless when all you want is for one thing to go your way for once. I'm really sorry you're missing your companions.

I thought I had posted the whole story a week ago. Or at least I thought about posting about it, but apparently I didn't.

Sorry--I know how annoying it can be when someone is upset about something but won't say what.

ATAT, I'm also really sorry about the pet situation. It sounds like you did the right thing for your pets and that bringing them home isn't really an option. I get how important pets can be. Adopting the guinea pigs at the start of the pandemic is one of the best decisions I've made.

I think you should definitely look at adopting. It sounds like new cat was the one you especially connected with, so I'd probably look for cats first.

I read a recent article in the Washington Post about how shelters/rescues are running out of animals with lots of people adopting due to the pandemic. However, it was mostly about dogs. Many people posted comments both criticizing that the article was so dog-focused (all the photos were owners and dogs), but also saying that there isn't the same shortage of cats in shelters. So I think you'd be able to find a cat. Though I think you could find a dog as well, if you wanted and didn't need it to be hypoallergenic or a specific breed.

I know a new animal won't be the same, but maybe it would help?

I'm sorry about the pet situation, @@. I'm glad you explained, too. I thought it was something like you couldn't take them home at the time but would have to pick them up later. I didn't know it was a permanent thing.

I agree with the previous post. In my area, the shelters can't keep dogs "in stock" but they still have plenty of cats.

I'm not sure what's right for you, but I usually have to wait a while after losing a pet to get a new one. I have to process my emotions and, especially with a dog, learn what it feels like to live without a pet for a while to make sure I really want that responsibility again. Maybe I would feel differently if I lost a pet to my mother rather than to them passing away; I'm not sure. But don't feel like you have to rush into anything. And if you do get a new pet, don't expect to have exactly the same relationship with them that you had with new cat and lone dog. They've all got such different personalities!

Anyway, I'm sorry you're going through this and I hope it gets easier for you. If you want to talk, you can always PM me.