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unaluna
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Default Mar 31, 2021 at 08:04 PM
  #101
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If you like that guy, you might like this guy too. He also does historical cooking.

Townsends - YouTube
I already have his nutmeg and a cookbook! Im a little afraid of him tho, im afraid hes gonna make me whisk (whatever direction) with a broom. Frankly i prefer pretty cooking boys. My town is full of creepy ol bearded overtalkin guys so full of themselves that no women want to listen to them anymore. Maybe the pretty boys turn into creepy ol guys, but thats the next generations problem.
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Default Mar 31, 2021 at 08:06 PM
  #102
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It's probably not a good time for me to bring up my biennial mention of the Great Molasses Flood of 1919 in Boston...turns out, molasses can move quite quickly when it's under pressure.

And speaking of pressure, I really need to do some SIM card shopping. Really really need to.
I get the molasses story and the exploding whale story mixed up.
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Default Apr 01, 2021 at 05:50 AM
  #103
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Crap crap crap crap crap


I told my BF a messed-up thing about my childhood* and now I'm freaking out.


We were ever-so-slightly drunk and giggly because we'd taken an online beer tasting class and had about a bottle of beer each (which is more than either of us usually drink). And we were hanging out in bed, laughing about how we had completely opposite childhoods when it came to sex ed (he grew up in the Middle East and I grew up in a super liberal part of the US). I mentioned the messed-up thing and he said, "what?! That's awful! That must have been traumatic," and put his arms around me. And I had been laughing, but him saying that sort of brought me to the awfulness of it (and also the awfulness of other messed up stuff that happened) and all of a sudden it wasn't funny anymore. And he was falling asleep and I kept my head buried in his chest and felt like crying and I both wanted him to notice and didn't want him to notice because I didn't want to be alone with it but also I didn't want to contaminate him with my messed-up-ness or make him have to deal with my big trauma feelings when he was just trying to fall asleep, the poor bastard. And I was sort of snuffling into his shoulder and he woke up and said, "what's wrong? Are you crying?" And he sleepily put his hands on my face and tilted my head so I would look him in the eye. And I said, "I just got stuck thinking about some bad things." And he put his arms around me and said, "try not to think about the bad things, please, babe" and drifted off again.


I shouldn't have told him. We've only been together for four months; wtf was I thinking?


Moreover, I hate how ambivalent I am about talking about it because it is so effing BPD to be like, "I just dropped this tuth-bomb but no wait now I can't tell you any more about it nevermind but I also can't stop having big feelings about it so now I'm just messed up and sad but can't talk about it or get over it I'm just stuck and now you're stuck with a girlfriend who is in no-fun-trauma-mode."


I hate myself so much right now.

Hey, you deserve a loving and supportive bf. I get the shame, don't have BPD but relate to the spiral. And feeling like I contaminate people.

If it helps, even before I got together with my fiancé (we were friends 1st), he witnessed me go through a lot of family abuse... never judged me for it, only my abusers.

Hugs. The self hatred isn't earned.
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Default Apr 01, 2021 at 07:55 AM
  #104
sending hugs to all who want.
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Default Apr 01, 2021 at 11:54 AM
  #105
I’m determined to finish my NaNoWrimo novel this month — I got up to 33k words in November but then I had a solid week of work and fell off the wagon. I want to get to 50k by the end of the month (during which I do not have any shifts scheduled!) so it should be totally doable.

The issue is that in order to finish, I have to go back and re-read what I’ve already written... which is sort of embarrassing and sometimes just plain bad. But I’m going to give it a shot, and try to get 1k words in today!
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Default Apr 01, 2021 at 12:07 PM
  #106
Good luck, Chihiro. I kind of know the feeling. I got to 10,000 words on my project recently, and it seems to have stopped me in my tracks. I hope you are able to make your goal.

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Default Apr 01, 2021 at 12:29 PM
  #107
We have very little work right now (not surprising, it's almost Easter weekend so people aren't writing in very much this week) so they offered VTO (voluntary time off) today. I finished the messages I had been assigned, made sure I was comfortably above quota for the day which I was, and took advantage of the offer about 30 minutes ago since today's my Friday. Starting the weekend early! Woohoo!

I am feeling so much better about everything in general than I had been last week and prior. H and I had a really good discussion yesterday where we cleared the air about a few things and that was really helpful. I feel lighter today.
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Default Apr 01, 2021 at 01:28 PM
  #108
I don't know that I would worry too much about word counts and think you're failing if you don't hit them. They're just a marker set by publishers and the novel-writing month people. (And they pay the price because now a lot of people send novels to publishers after NaNoWriMo thinking all they needed to do was hit the word count and they're a professional novelist.)

To me what really matters is done and complete within itself. And then draft and redraft till you're sick of it for quality. (Also known as why it takes me so long to finish a story.)

Plus, as the Greeks said, μεγὰ βιβλίον, μεγὰ κακόν (big book, big evil--no one told Stephen King, alas).

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Default Apr 01, 2021 at 02:07 PM
  #109
Personally, I am glad no one told Stephen King. I love his "big books" and when the complete and uncut version of The Stand came out, I was thrilled!!
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Default Apr 01, 2021 at 02:16 PM
  #110
Just got our 2021/22 symphony season lineup. Hoping for a normal concert season once again. I have missed singing perhaps most of all.
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Default Apr 01, 2021 at 02:16 PM
  #111
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Originally Posted by chihirochild View Post
I’m determined to finish my NaNoWrimo novel this month — I got up to 33k words in November but then I had a solid week of work and fell off the wagon. I want to get to 50k by the end of the month (during which I do not have any shifts scheduled!) so it should be totally doable.

The issue is that in order to finish, I have to go back and re-read what I’ve already written... which is sort of embarrassing and sometimes just plain bad. But I’m going to give it a shot, and try to get 1k words in today!

Good luck chihiro! You can do it! I think it's wonderful to get the words/ideas on paper, no matter how 'bad' you might think they are the first time through. That's what edits/rewrites are for.... I think it's more important to get the story out first, then you can improve it. The way I see it is, I feel like when I try too hard to write it perfectly the first time out, I forget my ideas and fall out of creativity and into something else entirely and then I give up. That's my mission now. To just write - just let the story flow out of me whether it even has punctuation or not let alone perfect grammar. Like when I write down my dreams. Like when I write my poems. It's interesting, when I write poetry, I'm most definitely in another place and sometimes when I read them back, I don't even remember writing parts of them which I think is mega cool when it happens. But when I am using my dreams to create stories from, that's where I forget to just let the story come and not worry about the other.


I'm rambling. Sorry.
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Default Apr 01, 2021 at 02:21 PM
  #112
Speaking of writing poems, it's National Poetry Month again! I shall again attempt the poem a day challenge. Just wrote #1.


I'm off now to go decide on what poetic form I shall use for tomorrow's poem! I love April.
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Default Apr 01, 2021 at 02:42 PM
  #113
I prefer the second draft and beyond editing. Crafting each sentence to be precise and concise. I am a fan of brevity. I hate the plot part.

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Default Apr 01, 2021 at 02:52 PM
  #114
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Personally, I am glad no one told Stephen King. I love his "big books" and when the complete and uncut version of The Stand came out, I was thrilled!!
Early in the pandemic I read "It." It should not take 900 pages to fight the clown.

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I prefer the second draft and beyond editing. Crafting each sentence to be precise and concise. I am a fan of brevity. I hate the plot part.
No wonder you are a Beckett fan.
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Default Apr 01, 2021 at 02:55 PM
  #115
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I prefer the second draft and beyond editing. Crafting each sentence to be precise and concise. I am a fan of brevity. I hate the plot part.
I enjoy that too. For grad school there was one class where we had to write a 150 page paper, you could use a partner, or up to four people. I did it with a partner who had a similar writing style and we edited and edited and edited and edited that thing. Got a pretty high A on it as well.

But I remember one bizarre teacher in Grad school that insisted each sentence have 7 words and each paragraph 4 sentences. It was bizarre. I was like, "What?" I don't remember what class she taught but I got an A in it. I just had to be very careful with my wording and say exactly what I meant in seven words per sentence.

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Default Apr 01, 2021 at 03:08 PM
  #116
Therapy with my T on Saturday. Not sure what I am going to talk about this time. I always have this problem when I am not in crisis. I can't think of anything to say.


There is one thing. My former T appears to be back to practicing and I contacted her to see if she would take me back as a client. (We stopped because of her MS.) But it's been six days and she hasn't responded so I sent another email to see if she a) got the first one and b) thinks it is a good idea I go back to her or not. But I don't know how to bring this up to current T especially because I don't know if Former T wants to see me again. I'd practically do anything to see former T again (which sort of tells me it's a bad idea to see her again but I know I would anyway) but I don't want to hurt current T's feelings if Former T doesn't even want me back. Which I wouldn't blame her if she didn't (oh my feelings would be hurt but I wouldn't blame her) because I was probably a needy client who sucked dry all her emotional resources. But I'm not the same person I was 2.5 years ago. Argh. I don't know.

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Default Apr 01, 2021 at 03:10 PM
  #117
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Early in the pandemic I read "It." It should not take 900 pages to fight the clown.


.....

i guess i just really get into the characters, you know? i like feeling like i have met and spent time with real people, like i was actually with them, when i finish one of his books. i dunno. I hate it when I love the story that's being told but the book is so dang short that i'm left with a big hole and wanting to know more about the people in it. also probably why i don't go out of my way to read short stories in magazines. I'm always left annoyingly wanting.

haha does that mean i'm a noseypants?
Or maybe it means I lead a boring life.
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Default Apr 01, 2021 at 03:16 PM
  #118
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I enjoy that too. For grad school there was one class where we had to write a 150 page paper, you could use a partner, or up to four people. I did it with a partner who had a similar writing style and we edited and edited and edited and edited that thing. Got a pretty high A on it as well.

But I remember one bizarre teacher in Grad school that insisted each sentence have 7 words and each paragraph 4 sentences. It was bizarre. I was like, "What?" I don't remember what class she taught but I got an A in it. I just had to be very careful with my wording and say exactly what I meant in seven words per sentence.

7 words per sentence, 4 sentence paragraphs? I would totally fail at that, probably. I can imagine it was not easy. Feels weird to do it even once.
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Default Apr 01, 2021 at 03:18 PM
  #119
omg i just realized it's only 1pm and i have all afternoon free! I'm going to go make those brioche buns again this time with the right flour. Pic to come later.
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Default Apr 01, 2021 at 03:21 PM
  #120
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7 words per sentence, 4 sentence paragraphs? I would totally fail at that, probably. I can imagine it was not easy. Feels weird to do it even once.
Yeah, Artie, you did it very well. In class you would have done well. It takes planning and some precise thinking. After all, I really wanted an A.

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