Where is my card?

My therapist is on vacation and he asked me before he went whether there was anything he could do to make the absence easier and he suggested sending me a card (normally he would just give me something, but we were on zoom). I said that would be nice. Well, we are halfway and I haven't received anything. We didn't specify when he would send it but you would think it makes sense that a transitional object would be sent near the start right?
I feel like the possibilities are
a) he didn't send it yet
b) he forgot
c) it is lost in the post

I think a) is weird because it's supposed to be a transitional object. b) would be VERY out of character, he has never forgotten to do anything he promised to do before, and c) is possible I guess, I did move house 3 years ago and though I gave him my new address, maybe he got mixed up?

I'm loath to contact him while he is away but it's really unsettled me. It triggers all my abandonment stuff.

Did they mean a postcard from where they are on holiday? Could take a while if they are in a touristy area and loads of mail being sent? Maybe something to do with this heatwave…
If they didn’t go anywhere and is just taking time off, then I would guess it has got lost or just delayed in the mail somehow. Hope one turns up soon for you!

Thanks, yeah he has gone somewhere quite touristy (much to my dismay, given the covid situation- though he promised he would stay out of the way of people). I didn't think about post delay possibility. I assumed he meant he would send me something before he went but we didn't actually specify, so maybe? That would mean taking my address on holiday with him which seems a bit of a faff.
I wish he had been more specific about what he planned to do.

In my experience post cards can take forever to turn up, so if he had planned to send it while away (which seems likely), it seems possible that it just hasn't arrived yet. It's horrible waiting and worrying, especially when all the abandonment fears kick in, but try not to panic. Maybe it'll come in the next few days. If T is okay with contact and you don't get the card towards the end of the holiday, would it feel okay to send a quick text or email to check?

If he is traveling, it can be a pain to find postage, yadda yadda. And mail can be slow. He might beat it home.

I would guess mail delays, too (I mean, our mail is a mess here in the US lately, though know you're in UK). I hope you receive something soon and that he didn't forget.

I'm sorry you're dealing with this right now.

I think Royal mail have generally been swamped since the pandemic started but stuff should still arrive within 10 days if it was sent out.

In the meantime can you go through some of your older letters/emails from the previous years to make him feel more real whilst he's away?

Thanks Lemoncake, I guess I just feel really disconnected to him too, it's hard to read anything he writes and feel it. Because of covid he's not been away for so long. I'm probably struggling more as a result.

If it helped you I would send a email just to ask if he had sent the postcard. You will not ruin his holiday if you choose to do so either.

What small things could you do when he returns to feel more connected? When does he come back? Would you be open to seeing another T in the background?

Ah Lemon, you are so nice, thank you so much for these suggestions. I am feeling a bit sheepish because, guess what turned up in the post! Yep, a card from T. He has sent it while away and it's a greetings card with a photo on the front depicting the area he is in. He obviously intended it to come in time for today, when our session would have been.

Oh Echos, I'm so glad you got your card! Nice of T to think of you while on vacation and send you something meaningful at a time when you needed it! HUGS!

Echos I'm so glad you got the card, and what perfect planning to have it arrive the day your session would have been.

I'm glad you got your card Echo.

Hurray!!!

glad the postcard found you! you story reminded me of what happened with my ex-t when he left for a five week backpacking holiday to Nepal. he too had promised to send a postcard at some time during his adventure and the postcard ended up taking nine months to find me! turns out he was just at the end of his trip when that devastating earthquake in 2015 hit and i assume that is partially why it was so delayed. by the time i had received it and because of the original drama surrounding his return home after that natural catastrophe, i had completely forgotten that he even promised to send a postcard. imagine my surprise when it finally showed up in my mail box!