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ArtieTheSequal
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Default Jan 07, 2022 at 03:14 PM
  #501
Had to run to the grocery store for a few things since I only have one day off this weekend and h is out on a couple of jobs today. Back to my butterflies.
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Default Jan 07, 2022 at 03:45 PM
  #502
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I decided to make butterflies and here is the first one. H said the color needs to be brighter, a better contrast to the white, so the rest will be purple/white, hot pink/white, etc.

Although since yellow IS my favorite color I will just keep this one for myself.
I LOVE it!

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Default Jan 07, 2022 at 03:49 PM
  #503
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omg CNS. I'm so very sorry that he said that. holy crap what an awful thing for him to say. Hugs if wanted.

Those are basically my thoughts in response to that as well, CNS. And it's not fair for him to blame you (or his Asperger's)--did he apologize at all? Also sending hugs if wanted.
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Default Jan 07, 2022 at 03:50 PM
  #504
Hugs, Kit, I'm glad you were able to reach out to your T last night and have it be helpful in some way. I also understand not wanting to contract for longer. Do you have enough this weekend to keep you occupied?
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Default Jan 07, 2022 at 03:57 PM
  #505
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Hugs, Kit, I'm glad you were able to reach out to your T last night and have it be helpful in some way. I also understand not wanting to contract for longer. Do you have enough this weekend to keep you occupied?
Thanks, LT.

I hope so. I have a religious study tomorrow that I am leading (that I haven't even studied for yet! EEK ) And there's Church and Football on Sunday. A friend sent me a paint by numbers (I was a little insulted but she meant well and it's a cute picture) so I thought I might do that on Saturday.


I can always contract with her through the weekend if I need to and she said to let her know if I need to talk before our appointment Monday. I know she can see me Sunday for example but I feel weird about a Sunday appointment since in my culture it is a day of rest.


I did, for once, let my parents know what was up. So they are in the loop. If need be, my Dad will take me out for a long drive or something. It usually calms me down and we just chill or I will binge some Britbox.


I'm really hoping the magic of a Friday afternoon kicks in once I am off of work at 330. Then I am usually in a much better mood. Except tonight I have to study because I forgot all about the class tomorrow.

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Default Jan 07, 2022 at 04:37 PM
  #506
I am confused - what is wrong with someone saying it if it is true? He didn't say he wanted it to happen just that he expected it. I think that way about someone I am close to. Granted, I have no moral objection to suicide and that seems to be where I differ from some so it could be that.

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Default Jan 07, 2022 at 04:49 PM
  #507
He didn't really apologize, just said that it was okay to say it if was true. I'm coping okay with it though.
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Default Jan 07, 2022 at 04:50 PM
  #508
I might have worded it poorly, English is not my first language. It was not meant to be waiting as in it's a thing you expect to happen, but waiting as in anxiously hoping for it to happen.
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Default Jan 07, 2022 at 05:05 PM
  #509
My sister has a bichon and is making some banner thing or something for her house, she found this crochet pattern and asked me to make one that she'll sew onto the banner. So here it is, I'm totally in love with how it turned out!!
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File Type: jpg bichon.jpg (49.0 KB, 24 views)
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Default Jan 07, 2022 at 05:08 PM
  #510
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I might have worded it poorly, English is not my first language. It was not meant to be waiting as in it's a thing you expect to happen, but waiting as in anxiously hoping for it to happen.

the second one was how I heard it in my head when I read it and why I reacted the way I did. i still feel like that was an awful thing for him to say.
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Default Jan 07, 2022 at 05:09 PM
  #511
That is adorable, Artie! Beautiful work.

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Default Jan 07, 2022 at 05:16 PM
  #512
CNS I'm so sorry your partner said that to you. I was hoping he meant he was dreading it might happen one day, which is horrible enough. Then I read your clarification. Holy wow I'm just so sorry.

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Default Jan 07, 2022 at 05:35 PM
  #513
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My sister has a bichon and is making some banner thing or something for her house, she found this crochet pattern and asked me to make one that she'll sew onto the banner. So here it is, I'm totally in love with how it turned out!!
Adorbs, Artie, truly.

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Default Jan 07, 2022 at 06:10 PM
  #514
Thanks guys. I love the little curly tail on him. I wondered how they did that, til I followed the directions and it just curled like that naturally
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Default Jan 07, 2022 at 06:28 PM
  #515
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He didn't really apologize, just said that it was okay to say it if was true. I'm coping okay with it though.
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I might have worded it poorly, English is not my first language. It was not meant to be waiting as in it's a thing you expect to happen, but waiting as in anxiously hoping for it to happen.
It isn't okay to say some things even if they're true. There is no moral compulsion to speak the truth if it's hurtful. That's an option, but so is not saying anything--which is not the same as lying.

As for Asperger's, that's a reason he said that, sure, but it's not an excuse if he's using it that way.

And your clarification makes it worse (for me anyway). If your presence is so intolerable to him that he is anxiously awaiting your death, he can leave you. In fact--that is morally incumbent on him if he's suffering so much. He'll tell the truth even when it hurts to you, but not himself, apparently.

I hope you're okay this week before you can see your therapist again.

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Default Jan 07, 2022 at 08:19 PM
  #516
CNS, that is a horrifying thing to say to another human. True, Asperger's, whatever, it's not okay. Truth is not meant to be wielded as a weapon and neurodivergence is not an excuse for speaking harmful words. I am so sorry he said that to you.

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Default Jan 07, 2022 at 10:10 PM
  #517
I'm feeling really triggered tonight and want to SH. I
won't, but I feel like it. I wish L was available. I didn't know it would affect me like this, but then again I wasn't prepared to talk about the subject this session.

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Default Jan 08, 2022 at 03:45 AM
  #518
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I'm feeling really triggered tonight and want to SH. I
won't, but I feel like it. I wish L was available. I didn't know it would affect me like this, but then again I wasn't prepared to talk about the subject this session.
Have you ever tried gripping ice cubes when you feel that way? It causes pain but not permanent damage. Someone else who used to SH suggested that to me.
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Default Jan 08, 2022 at 05:44 AM
  #519
Thanks for all your kind words, I'm feeling better today, I'll be fine until I see my T.


Hope all of you are doing okay as well, hugs for everyone who wants or needs them.
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Default Jan 08, 2022 at 07:39 AM
  #520
Hugs, Scarlet. I'm sorry you were feeling so badly. I hope you were able to stay safe. I've also heard of the ice cube method and have used it once or twice.
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