Your thoughts?

So last time I saw art T things were “off” as usual. We talked some about awesome T because I find it comforting and grounding. I shared about a session that T had to use the bathroom and was over the top trying not to trigger me. We had a good laugh and she commented on how caring he is… OK, all good… then a natural pause… Then art T asks if awesome T ever eats his lunch with me, I looked at her a bit perplexed and she said he ate his lunch with her a few times and she had always wondered…*pause*… if it was because she was, you know, different…. Because she was special to him. I said that if I meet with a therapist around lunch time I tell them I am OK with them eating in my session because I know sometimes things come up and they might not have the chance otherwise. She got quiet and looked at the ground for a bit before going back to how wonderful he was.
I was weirded out. Being *special* to a man was never a pleasant experience for me. It felt like she was begging the question of if he had ever been her therapist (she often goes on about how he knows EVERYTHING about her and still lets her work there). It kind of felt like she was competing with a new baby sister. IDK… just when I think things can’t get worse with her she comes up with a new way to make me feel weird.
I told Pdoc about the lunch thing and Pdoc was pretty upset about the inappropriateness of it and how she couldn’t think of anything appropriate a therapist might be trying to say that I could misconstrue as that.
So… IDK… I have an appointment with her tomorrow and, as usual, I don’t want to go. It feels like a huge waste of time and money. I will go anyway because I can’t cancel without being charged at this point. I am thinking about using it as an office training opportunity for my new-ish service dog.
What do you guys think???

Yeah, I guess Id find that question a little weird. What most concerns me is that you have never seemed to connect to her/never have a good session. Any particular reason you stay with art T?

Inappropriate and unethical. How on earth is that therapeutic?

She clearly needs both therapy (to work out her desire to be 'special') and supervision (to be reminded of what is appropriate to say to clients).

Now I understand why you never seemed to like her. She seems 'off'. In more ways than one.

How many sessions with her have you had?

I don't think you like her and there is a weird triangle going on.

I meet with her tomorrow and then awesome T next week. I sent her an email today letting her know that I am thinking that we are not a good fit for therapy. I am thinking tomorrow will likely be our last session or we may have a closure session after I meet with awesome T. Things just seem to be getting worse and worse with her and way far from therapeutic. Pdoc is usually pretty solid and will not get in too deep when I am having trouble with a T... but her reaction was loud and strong that this isn't OK.

It kind of sounds like she wanted to bond with you over some sort of infatuation with awesome therapist. Very odd.

I don't necessarily think asking about the eating lunch thing would be inappropriate, though a bit weird. However, it would certainly bother me (and maybe it's also inappropriate) if a second T I was talking to talked about how they felt special to my actual T. I can see how it can seem like she's competing.

I agree with the others that you've never seemed to fond of her and that alone for me would be enough to not see her anymore. As far as I know, he's also her supervisor? I agree that that's also a weird triangle going on with which I can see many things that can go wrong. I'd usually say if you have two therapists, try for them to not be connected.

I'd suggest you still bring your service dog with you, maybe that calms you down a bit with her so you can stand your ground if necessary?

Yes, awesome T is her supervisor and he is really good at managing the triangle dynamics so that doesn’t bug me too much. The first time I tried working with her I think we made it two or three sessions before she triggered me really badly and I left. This time I think we have had maybe 5or 6 sessions..
Yes, my service dog will be coming with me today mostly because I do not like confrontation especially when I have to be the “aggressor”. Normally I can work just about anything out just by talking with a person and explaining things.
Awesome T is OK with whatever I decide. He even offered more video sessions while he is away if I need them. I think he is sad that it isn’t working, I know he was hopeful. I would like to think he is learning more about how she is with her clients so that he can better help her improve as a T.

Did you have a session today with art T, Omers? How'd it go?

Thanks for checking velcro!
Yes, we met today. She had read my email and was much less pushy and "loud". I did bring my service dog who was a wonderful distraction and it was a good training session for her (we are still working on generalizing to new places and situations). She was supportive of my sharing my frustrations and needs and she really was trying to keep it toned down. We only had one awkward moment and it was in relation to my service dog. She said she is very open to better meeting me where I am at and I let her know that I don't trust easily the first time and have a very hard time trusting that she would continue to back off... So... I let her know I would process it with awesome T as well and I may or may not schedule with her again. She did ask if it was OK for her to say hi to me in the waiting area if we happened to run into each other and I am OK with that.
I am not sure where I will go with it... but in reality I am really thinking about cutting back on therapy anyways. I have some other medical needs that have been being neglected as I can't afford them and therapy and it might be time to get those attended to.

Sounds like you handled that like a boss!
I gotta say I had a strong visceral reaction to your initial description of her telling you she was special to him. The kindest part of me worried about whether she was, perhaps, unwell. Whatever the issue, I’m glad you’re outta there!

Thanks favorite jeans. Yes, I also had a very visceral reaction to her saying that. Creeped me waaaaay out! One thing she did share is that I remind her of her best friend… when she told me about this friend I agreed that her perception of me as a friend was accurate… and then firmly told her I was her client and that is NOT who I am as a client.
I see awesome T this week so we will have a chance to talk about it. He mentioned that we had some bumps when we first started too (I agree we had a couple bumps but…) Oh my though… I have never felt such rage towards awesome T! I couldn’t believe he would compare the minor bumps in our relationship (all but one of which were him being too cautious by my opinion) to her nonsense!!! So… that will come up I am sure.