[LostOnTheTrail]

Hi all,

I hope you are doing well. I've just finished a session with R, and she asked whether I have a relaxing rest of the day planned. Without a moment's thought as to how it would sound, I replied "I have now."

She laughed, and I remain mortified. She told me that she doesn't want an apology next week, so I promptly said "Let's get it out of the way now."

Have you ever said something to your T and immediately regretted either what you said or the way it came out?


I would be glad to know I am not alone.

[ElectricManatee]

I have said much, much worse things to my T, sometimes with regret and sometimes without. I think both of my therapists would be really pleased if I decided to have a relaxing day after a tough session. That's good self-care, right?

[LostOnTheTrail]

Thanks, EM.


I agree with you. I'm more concerned about the way it came out. 'I have now!'

[Favorite Jeans]

Perhaps I’m a little dense but I’m failing to see what’s mortifying or apology-worthy here.

You meant you weren’t going to be able to accomplish much that day because you were emotionally drained from therapy, right?

It sounds like she was sort of suggesting that since you’d just had a big session, that you not tax yourself further if possible.

So you were basically agreeing with her.

If your personal trainer had just worked you to your limit would you play it cool and be like, “me? Tired? No, no, I’m actually running a marathon right after I leave…”

You weren’t rude at all. But even if you’d been a bit sharper, it’s okay, you don’t have to take care of your therapist. That’s why you pay her.

[LostOnTheTrail]

Thanks, FJ.

I'm concerned that the way I said it came across as if I didn't want to be in therapy. Almost like 'I have a relaxing day planned now we've finished the session.'

She laughed it off, but I'm well-known for overthinking these things.

[Waterbear]

I think therapist know how hard this work is. How difficult sessions can be. I think they get it 🥰

[Lostislost]

Yeah I was moving house and I said what a shithole the street I lived on was, and then my T said he grew up on that street...oops.

[LostOnTheTrail]

Whoops! You couldn't have known, though.

[ScarletPimpernel]

I was telling L about how I was taught to do dishes. Next session she told me she was thinking about me when she did her dishes. I told her I was sorry and hoped I didn't make her anymore neurotic.

[Favorite Jeans]

Originally Posted by Lostislost

Yeah I was moving house and I said what a shithole the street I lived on was, and then my T said he grew up on that street...oops.

Lololol!!!
I literally laughed out loud. He probably shouldn’t have told you that.

I’m picturing this as a comedy sketch where the client tries to rescue the situation by saying, “well, yes, but I mean, that was ages ago, I’m sure it was really nice back in the day…” and the therapist getting all insulted because they don’t think they’re that old.

[Lostislost]

Originally Posted by Favorite Jeans

Lololol!!!
I literally laughed out loud. He probably shouldn’t have told you that.

I’m picturing this as a comedy sketch where the client tries to rescue the situation by saying, “well, yes, but I mean, that was ages ago, I’m sure it was really nice back in the day…” and the therapist getting all insulted because they don’t think they’re that old.

Omg I didn’t even think about that…hope I didn’t say anything like that haha! I remember saying sorry and silently hoping that his parents don’t still live on that street..because how awkward

[Favorite Jeans]

Originally Posted by Lostislost

Omg I didn’t even think about that…hope I didn’t say anything like that haha! I remember saying sorry and silently hoping that his parents don’t still live on that street..because how awkward

This is squarely on him. You’re allowed to have any opinion in the world about the street where you live. He should not have said a word. But he’s not perfect either. We’re all kind of awkward.

Just as with the original post, they are meant to be there for you. You pay them for it. It’s not a job interview or a first date.

[Lostislost]

Originally Posted by Favorite Jeans

This is squarely on him. You’re allowed to have any opinion in the world about the street where you live. He should not have said a word. But he’s not perfect either. We’re all kind of awkward.

Just as with the original post, they are meant to be there for you. You pay them for it. It’s not a job interview or a first date.

I don't think he took any offence from my comment, but it really felt like I facepalm moment lol!

[Lonelyinmyheart]

When I was 18 I saw my first T who was in her 60's. I had an evening job working with the elderly. We always had a hug at the end of sessions and one time I innocently said 'I'm going to look after old people now.' I didn't mean it the way it sounded but as soon as the words were out of my mouth I cringed horribly. She didn't say anything but I was so embarrassed. Many years on I still feel embarrassed when I think about it.