Couch 238: Appreciating Small Progress Couch

stopdog · 03:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LostOnTheTrail

Uninstalling and reinstalling the app got rid of the 'recommendation' for me, but I still don't like the thought of it actually being available on the site. Hopefully not too much longer.

ARe you trying to get them to censor what others can see/books to purchase? I don't think that is the call for anyone else to make. I am outraged to think amazon/libraries/bookstores might take a book off of the shelf because someone didn't like the contents. Surely that person should not have to read the book but taking it from everyone is wrong.

SlumberKitty · Jun 28, 2022 at 01:44 PM

I don't know if I am having negative symptoms of Schizoaffective disorder or if I am having symptoms of depression, since they kind of overlap, or if I am having both. I want to go home and sleep but I feel like I have a responsibility to be at work. At least we have Monday off for Independence day so I feel like I will get a little break with the three day weekend. I don't know. Maybe I need to go to the hospital again. I don't feel suicidal but I am having a lot of difficulty with how I am feeling. Maybe my therapist can help me tonight. I don't know if I will be able to adequately explain how I feel. Tomorrow is my birthday. I don't want to feel this crappy tomorrow.

AliceKate · Jun 28, 2022 at 02:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ChickenNoodleSoup

Here, in Switzerland, anestehsia is certainly not done for most normal procedures. It's done for pulling teeth or such, but for scraping your teeth to clean them, doing stuff to braces, putting a filling into a hole that isn't caries... none of that is done under any anesthesia, and I think that's mostly a good thing.

Same here. I mean, the things you mention aren't painful, right? Just really uncomfortable.

AliceKate · Jun 28, 2022 at 02:59 PM

Censoring is bad, but a society must decide where to draw the line and there are books that are forbidden, even in western countries. I think it's okay to ask for censorship, just not to go around with a mop of people burning books at will. When we ask for stuff, they can be discussed and, if appropriate, discarded.

trigger warning for humans. Pun intended, just not sure how to explain who'd be triggered by this without naming the subject.

Possible trigger:

I heard of a book, many years ago, that is blacklisted. If my memory serves me well, it included very detailed instructions of how to best kill someone, written specifically for that purpose. I never saw that book, mind you.

stopdog · Jun 28, 2022 at 03:33 PM

I am against all censorship - knowledge is good. How one uses the knowledge is up to them -but do not try and impose your limits on other people. Just because you don't want to know or see something does not mean you get to keep it away from everyone. I honestly don't care what it is about - knowing does not equal acting. Books give you knowledge which no other human has the right to prevent.
You don't have to read it but by god you don't get to tell me I can't.

I had to go to ebay to get 6 copies of a book I consider to be incredibly important to possess due to the american smothering theocracy and embrace of misery causing religion and its nonsensical way of viewing death. But I have them and they have come in handy to give to those who needed the information and for my person. Having information brought her comfort.

SlumberKitty · Jun 28, 2022 at 04:05 PM

What if I have to live like this forever and never get better? I can't tell if I am in a low place or this is reality. I used to be a person. Now I am just a robot or a zombie. My thoughts get eaten up. I have no life in me.

LostOnTheTrail · Jun 28, 2022 at 04:10 PM

I'm sorry you're going through this, Kit. You're so much more than a robot.
You're a person who's experiencing mental pain.

HUGS

comrademoomoo · Jun 28, 2022 at 04:20 PM

SlumberKitty, can you remember times when you have been well? Can you recall feeling human? What grounds you in your humanness? For me, I swim. I cook. Walk. I eat porridge. I shower. I spend time alone. Read. Clay. Sound baths. Grind coffee. Strong smells. Stretch. Take up space. Groan and screech.

comrademoomoo · Jun 28, 2022 at 04:28 PM

More women should screech more often. I frequently have the urge to screech in public spaces, especially supermarkets and cafes, but I always repress it. If we all screeched, what a loud and glorious chorus of pained, female souls we could be.

SlumberKitty · Jun 28, 2022 at 04:32 PM

Hi comrade. I can't really remember times I have been well though I am sure this is not so. I probably have been well sometimes I just can't remember them right now. I think the last time I felt human was when I was at my cousin's baby shower and my other cousin was there with her 3 month old. And I got to hold her a lot. It was precious times. It was also incredibly sad for me since I will probably never have children of my own but holding her made me feel like almost normal. This was a few months ago though. And she lives in AZ. So does my cousin that the baby shower was for. I live in CA.

comrademoomoo · Jun 28, 2022 at 04:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SlumberKitty

Hi comrade. I can't really remember times I have been well though I am sure this is not so. I probably have been well sometimes I just can't remember them right now. I think the last time I felt human was when I was at my cousin's baby shower and my other cousin was there with her 3 month old. And I got to hold her a lot. It was precious times. It was also incredibly sad for me since I will probably never have children of my own but holding her made me feel like almost normal. This was a few months ago though. And she lives in AZ. So does my cousin that the baby shower was for. I live in CA.

Being able to feel human is a significant part of wellness. Would holding a pet or animal help to recreate that feeling of connection with another living being? It sounds like that was a meaningful time with your cousin's baby.

LostOnTheTrail · Jun 28, 2022 at 04:41 PM

Hey Kit,

This might sound weird, but bear with me, OK?

Can you let yourself really bask in that memory of holding your cousin's baby, and that good feeling?
Close your eyes, and let yourself 'go there' for a few minutes, and then see how you feel.

Might bring you closer to a kind of balance.

HUGS

SlumberKitty · Jun 28, 2022 at 04:46 PM

Thank you Comrade and Lost. I will try both suggestions. HUGS kit

ArtieTheSequal · Jun 28, 2022 at 06:23 PM

I hope those suggestions are helpful, Kit. Showering, swimming, drumming, and being out in nature are helpful grounding things for me.

I do the screeching/screaming thing sometimes too - at night sometimes when I can't sleep - I scream into my pillow.

ArtieTheSequal · Jun 28, 2022 at 06:25 PM

Well, the fridge repair guy just left, took him a bit but he got our fridge and freezer both working again! Now we just need to let them get down to temperature and tomorrow after I get off work I'll go grocery shopping.

unaluna · Jun 28, 2022 at 06:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LostOnTheTrail

Hey Kit,
This might sound weird, but bear with me, OK?

Can you let yourself really bask in that memory of holding your cousin's baby, and that good feeling?
Close your eyes, and let yourself 'go there' for a few minutes, and then see how you feel.
Might bring you closer to a kind of balance.
HUGS

Hey if its good enough for Princess Kate, right?

unaluna · Jun 28, 2022 at 06:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by comrademoomoo

More women should screech more often. I frequently have the urge to screech in public spaces, especially supermarkets and cafes, but I always repress it. If we all screeched, what a loud and glorious chorus of pained, female souls we could be.

I have a feeling its gonna start happening more.

atisketatasket · Jun 28, 2022 at 07:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by unaluna

I have a feeling its gonna start happening more.

I screeched this morning when I found boxes of Xray films in the basement. My mother stored her old practice’s films there when it dissolved, apparently.

This was screech-worthy because they can’t just be thrown out, because HIPAA and because silver in the films would be environmentally toxic. Gotta find a recycler to take them.

It’s just one surprise after another here.

stopdog · Jun 28, 2022 at 07:15 PM

Record destruction is a pain. I had to hire a company to destroy a bunch of legal records for me - I had over 300 boxes - had to keep them a certain number of years before I could destroy them. And it isn't cheap. But at least the company I hired came to me with their massive destroying truck.

velcro003 · Jun 28, 2022 at 09:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ArtieTheSequal

Glad you got through the dental work, Kit. My dental phobia is so bad I haven't seen a dentist in like 6 years (trigger for dental stuff)

Possible trigger:

after having a tooth pulled which in itself wasn't awful but then i got dry socket and that was so very painful and made my phobia even worse, he had to shove a dissolving bag of something down into the socket and that hurt so much i can't even describe it. I really need to find a sedation dentist and go get a checkup.

My response is in trigger warnings, since it is about your TW

Possible trigger:

Ugh, dry socket is my worst fear, though I did survive wisdom tooth surgery in January without one. I'm sorry you had to deal with that. **shudders**

Quote:

Originally Posted by AliceKate

In my country, dentists are breaking the law when they hurt you. Anesthesia is a must. Is there no law for that in the US?

Mind you, my dentist is a little rough around the edges (he's an ex-army dentist), so he can be less observant about that when he gets impatient.

Lol, no. You can go to a special sedation dentist, but it isn't the norm for routine stuff.

Quote:

Originally Posted by comrademoomoo

More women should screech more often. I frequently have the urge to screech in public spaces, especially supermarkets and cafes, but I always repress it. If we all screeched, what a loud and glorious chorus of pained, female souls we could be.

Oh man, I just read this book where one of the main characters just screams in public. It would scare me if people actually did that, but I do see your point!

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Couch 238: Appreciating Small Progress Couch

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SlumberKitty Legendary Wise Elder Member Since Jul 2018 Location: CA Posts: 27,329 (SuperPoster!) 5 117.7k hugs given	Jun 28, 2022 at 04:05 PM #286 What if I have to live like this forever and never get better? I can't tell if I am in a low place or this is reality. I used to be a person. Now I am just a robot or a zombie. My thoughts get eaten up. I have no life in me. __________________ Dum Spiro Spero IC XC NIKA
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comrademoomoo Grand Poohbah Member Since Feb 2019 Location: Toodlepip Posts: 1,711 5	Jun 28, 2022 at 04:20 PM #288 SlumberKitty, can you remember times when you have been well? Can you recall feeling human? What grounds you in your humanness? For me, I swim. I cook. Walk. I eat porridge. I shower. I spend time alone. Read. Clay. Sound baths. Grind coffee. Strong smells. Stretch. Take up space. Groan and screech.
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comrademoomoo Grand Poohbah Member Since Feb 2019 Location: Toodlepip Posts: 1,711 5	Jun 28, 2022 at 04:28 PM #289 More women should screech more often. I frequently have the urge to screech in public spaces, especially supermarkets and cafes, but I always repress it. If we all screeched, what a loud and glorious chorus of pained, female souls we could be.
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SlumberKitty Legendary Wise Elder Member Since Jul 2018 Location: CA Posts: 27,329 (SuperPoster!) 5 117.7k hugs given	Jun 28, 2022 at 04:46 PM #293 Thank you Comrade and Lost. I will try both suggestions. HUGS kit __________________ Dum Spiro Spero IC XC NIKA
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ArtieTheSequal Writing my way through... Member Since Feb 2020 Location: In the desert Posts: 7,219 (SuperPoster!) 4 5,754 hugs given	Jun 28, 2022 at 06:23 PM #294 I hope those suggestions are helpful, Kit. Showering, swimming, drumming, and being out in nature are helpful grounding things for me. I do the screeching/screaming thing sometimes too - at night sometimes when I can't sleep - I scream into my pillow.
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ArtieTheSequal Writing my way through... Member Since Feb 2020 Location: In the desert Posts: 7,219 (SuperPoster!) 4 5,754 hugs given	Jun 28, 2022 at 06:25 PM #295 Well, the fridge repair guy just left, took him a bit but he got our fridge and freezer both working again! Now we just need to let them get down to temperature and tomorrow after I get off work I'll go grocery shopping.
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