He gave me his phone number???

So I'm in Assertive Community Treatment (ACT) and there's this on-call number you can call when you're needing someone to talk to or about to do something stupid. Yesterday I called and this guy talked to me and helped me out, and then he said if I call the on-call and don't get through to anyone quickly (you call, leave a message, and within 15 minutes they call back) I can call him and he gave me his number.

I found this very odd. I don't know the boundaries here. I've never been given a therapist's/counselor's phone number before. I don't know when it's okay to call him, he didn't really specify other than when on-call doesn't call back quick enough (but they always call back within 15 minutes and I've been good about waiting those 15 minutes before doing the stupid thing if I do call...I'm not good about calling before I do the stupid thing though).

So...how does this go? If your therapist or counselor gave you their number what are the boundaries between the two of you?

Your PACT person may be on call and given you that phone number which all PACT clients can do.

But he gave me his personal phone number, not the on-call number. No one else has done that in the entire time I've been in ACT.

If you aren't comfortable with having his number, don't use it. You can discuss the boundaries with him if you aren't clear about how it works. You have agency, you don't need to just respond to what he offers.

That's the plan. I just find it really weird and I feel sorta uncomfortable and confused.

I'm not sure, as I'm uncertain how the program you're in works.

I mean, I have my therapist's personal cell number, but that's because he uses the same phone for work and personal. We've also pretty thoroughly discussed guidelines and boundaries with it (and email). With texting, it's generally just supposed to be for scheduling purposes, though there have been maybe 10 times (in 5 years) I've used it for something else more "clinical" (like when I was in crisis once), and he was generally OK with it (less so one time, I guess, but it wasn't a big deal). But I think because I kept it within reason. With phone calls, he's made it very clear that he doesn't answer his phone and doesn't do unscheduled phone calls. I have called him exactly once in those 5 years, when I was upset about something (he didn't answer, I left a voicemail, and he texted then emailed me back).

Sorry, that was probably more than you wanted or needed to know! But I'd suggest discussing when you can use it. For now, I think it's fine to use it if you don't hear back from the on-call line quickly enough because he specifically said that. But it could be good to ask if you can directly call or text (if a cell) him if you're in crisis or otherwise need to talk, rather than going through the main line. Also to know if he generally answers or would want you to leave a message (or text) and then he'd call back.

Two of my former therapists (PhDs) were listed in the phone book, both office & home phone numbers.

Every therapist I had always gave me their cell number and my husband has his therapists cell number. It’s not unusual

Idk where you're from, but I've been in and out of therapy for about a decade and never once have I had someone give me their cell number.

I had my former marriage counselor's cell and my former T's as well (and they had separate office landlines)--I'm in the US, if that helps. They (and my current T) are all in private practice though, not working for an agency. So it may be that some agencies have policies where T's can't give out cell numbers, email addresses, etc.?


I don't think I had that from previous T's that I saw like 20 years ago, but then cells/texting were less mainstream then (and one was through an agency, too).

Unites States

My therapist gave me his cell number, but he has a separate cell phone dedicated exclusively to work.

My husband’s pain specialist gave me his personal cell number after his answering service dropped the ball in an emergency (he was furious with them).

My pdoc also gave me his cell (again, pretty sure it was dedicated only for work).

In each case, they trusted I would only use it in emergencies which was exactly what I did. They all told me they would not necessarily give their number to every client, but they explained a clear trust in my ability to not abuse the system with non-emergency calls.

Yes, that sounds pretty dodgy - especially as he gave you the number for you to call him personally. Unless that is his work phone rather than his personal phone? Then again, it is weird if callers have a return call in 15 minutes...

It is not common practice to be given a T's number so we can call at any given time. Not to mention the lack of boundaries or discussion about such. Sounds dodgy.

I have had the cell phone number for therapists and mds (not mine but my person -her oncologist and primary). One therapist told me to call any time. I did not use it because I never found talking to one of them on the phone as useful.

I've always had my Ts number, but he's a private T. Your situation sounds a bit different, I don't think he should've given you his personal number and it would make me not trust him.

I used to volunteer for a sui helpline, another volunteer there gave his personal number out and swapped insta names with callers etc. He was let go for breaching the rules and just using his position to talk to vulnerable females. Not saying it's the same as your situation, it just reminded me of it.

My psychiatrist gave me her cell number a while go. I only use it to notify her that I have arrived for my appointment or if I am going to be late. Nothing else. If I need to speak with her, I send her an email. We then arrange it from there.

She's a part of an ACT team. I see her at the ACT office that is inside a community health center. I deal with her directly rather than the office staff. This works well for us and it's discreet. Before that I used to go to the health center's reception and tell them who I was there to see.

My therapist gave me her number just a few sessions in just in case I needed extra support.