[smileygal]

I was speaking to a friend the other day about therapy and she mentioned that her new therapist stays seated when she leaves the appointment and how she find it awkward and strange. hat does your therapist do at the beginning of the end of session. My therapist used to stay seated in their old office but began standing when she moved a few years back. Looking back now I can see that the different behaviours evoked different feelings in me upon leaving. It got me wondering about what other therapists do. Does your stay seated when you leave or stand up and accompany you to door?

[LonesomeTonight]

So, the staying seated when I left thing led to a big conflict with my T a few years ago. He used to sit when I left (we'd shake hands, but he'd stay sitting). At the time, he'd move from the chair he sat in during session to his desk chair and sit, I'd hand him my credit card, he'd run it and hand it back (I used to have to sign a slip, but he later decided I didn't need to), we'd shake hands, then I'd open the door and leave.

This bothered me (other T's had opened the door and stayed standing while I left) because it felt sort of disrespectful in a way, I guess? It was partly the not standing, but also not opening the door. So eventually, I asked him about standing up when I left. He refused to do so without explaining why. Saying, "I don't want to have to stand up then just sit back down again." Which led to a rather ugly email exchange. A few weeks later, he explained that it was because he was having back issues and didn't want to have to stand up an additional time. If he had just said that from the outset, I'd have said, "OK, sure I understand."

We ultimately figured out a process where I paid at the beginning (he stayed standing while running my card), then when it was time for me to leave, he'd stand up, go over and open the door, then shake my hand while we said goodbye. It feels much better to me. (Now he uses a payment program where I don't have to give him a card, so that part doesn't matter anymore.) I do walk up the hall and out the waiting room myself, but that's fine with me.

Since you asked about beginning and end, for the beginning, he'll open the door to the waiting room (it's in an office suite) and hold it open while I walk past him. We'll generally say "hi" to each other. Then I walk ahead of him back to his office (which has the door open) and go in and sit down.

[Nammu]

I’ve had several therapists and I never noted if they stayed seated or stood up, obviously it was not important to me.

[ElectricManatee]

At the beginning of the session, both of my therapists walk to the waiting area to get me and then walk ahead of me to their office. They stand inside the door while I walk past them to go inside. Then they shut the door while I sit down. At the end of the session, they both get up and walk to the door and hold it open for me. Then I leave and walk down the hallway and back through the waiting room myself.

It's funny to realize that they do things exactly the same way even though they work independently and have completely different office setups. It feels courteous to me but also puts them in charge of starting and ending the session on time, which I appreciate.

My psychiatric nurse practitioner doesn't get up from her desk when I leave, which I find awkward. I'm never quite sure when I'm supposed to get up and leave and if I should close the door behind me or not. I would prefer she walked me to the door, but I don't care enough to say anything. It might get less awkward with time too, since I've only seen this psychiatric NP a couple of times.

[ChickenNoodleSoup]

At the start, he usually comes out of the office kitchen which is straight opposite from the waiting area. We shake hands, he walks in front of me to his office, waits at the door for me to enter, closes the door behind us and waits for me to get settled while sitting down.

He usually initiates the end of the session in some form by saying something like "so...." which I almost always pick up on. He stays seated while I put on my shoes and then usually gets up when I'm done together with me, though sometimes he stays seated and talks on for a bit (I think sometimes I'm a bit too quick to pick up on the end and don't want to overstay my welcome). Then he most of the time says our parting words of "we will see next Friday, and if anything comes up you can call on Wednesday", after which we shake hands. I then open the door and he closes it behind me.

I'm actually not sure I've ever shaken anyone's hand while they are still seated. I'd also find it weird for them to stay seated while I walk to the door by myself. Unless there's a good reason for it, I'd feel it's rather impolite.

[Waterbear]

My T sits in her chair when I leave. To be fair, it's such a small space that if we both got up at the same time it would be seriously awkward, and added to the fact that sometimes I give very little warning of when I'm going to leave, I just jump up, and say bye as I walk out the door!

[ScarletPimpernel]

L comes gets me from the waiting room. We walk back to her office together. At the end of session, we both get up, hug, she opens the door for me, and I go out the back exit.

I've never had a therapist who doesn't come get me or who doesn't get up at the end of session.

My ex-therapist would answer the door to me and lead the way to the door when I left - partly because we met at her house and partly because I suspect she wanted to make sure that I actually left the building. The only exceptions to this were the times I stormed out mid session. The current one sits on her arse as I arrive and sits on her arse as I leave. Seems fittingly different.

[ArtieTheSequal]

Ex-t would open the door and wave me to come in (no waiting room, I sat in my car) and at the end of each session she and I would both stand at the same time when time was up, and she would always unlock/open the door for me (home office, and the door opens to a little parking area off her driveway). Come to think of it the first year I saw her in an office building/suite, back then she would always get up and go open that door for me too. The 2nd t I saw so many years ago, I honestly don't remember if she got up or not it was so long ago. T1 was even longer ago, and I stormed out of the first session partway through, so HE did not get up. (He was a jerkface who kept trying to put words in mouth and I couldn't tolerate that.)

[Omers]

Awesome T would come out to the waiting area to get me and then he would walk in front of me to his office (in the beginning he never wanted to be between me and the door and then it became habit). twice he did not get up. In the beginning he would get up and walk across the office to the bathroom right after our session. Later he would get up, hug me and sit back down. There were also a couple of times he walked me to my car... once to pick tomatoes... that was a good end to a session.
Art T would come to the waiting area and say hi to my service dog and then walk behind us to her office in the beginning and then started walking way in front of us. She always stood up and walked us out of her office to the door of the waiting area.
New T comes out to get us and walks in front of us but goes into the office after us. I bring a blanket for my service dog because new T is a little uncomfortable with the idea of dog hair in is office. He always straightens her blanket (Awesome T was a neat freak but never cared about the service dog). Then is sits down in front of his computer for the first 10-15 min of session before closing it. When it is time to go he is always confused that my dog does not react when he stands or when I stand but waits for my cue. He opens the door and stands in it watching as we leave.

[stopdog]

I got the first woman to stay seated at the end. The first couple of times she tried getting up and going to the door -but as the room was small and I saw the door and know how they work - I was pretty much okay doing it by myself. I thought it was patronizing when she got up.

[AliceKate]

I ring the bell and at the buzz, walk up the stairs into T's office. On the way there I pass the kitchen where he usually stands drinking coffee. We say hi then, and again when he joins me in his office at the appointet time. At the end of the session, we both stand up. While I leave the room, he sorts his papers/ my file into a drawer. Usually I more-or-less involuntarily turn around at the door and say good bye or something similar. He usually turns around, sometimes fully, sometimes half-way and smiles. I exit.

[Lostislost]

Honestly I think it's just rude to stay seated when someone arrives or leaves, if it's just the 2 of you. I prefer my T to open and close the door for me because I hate touching door handles in public. And I don't like people being behind me either. Also men staying sitting down when they should be standing up makes me worried they have a secret boner. Hahaha.

[KLL85]

I hate sitting in a waiting room as my social anxiety is so bad, so I have an agreement with my T that I’ll ring the buzzer two minutes before my session is due to start, he will let me up and meet me at the top of the first flight of stairs where the waiting room is. He will smile and say hi and then walk in front of me up the second flight of stairs and along the corridor straight to our room. He’ll open the door, wait for me to walk in and then close it behind me. He will then sit down and we always start the session throwing a ball back and forth, sometimes he will speak during that, sometimes he waits until we are finished doing that and then he speaks.
At the end, he will let me know we have reached time and we will both stand up. He will walk to the door and open and it and then walk ahead of me down the first flight of stairs where he will then stop on the landing and say goodbye and then I’ll walk down the next flight of stairs to the door.

[Jesla]

First therapist would just say “times up,I’ll see you next week” and walk me to the back door of the building. This therapist, we give each other a hug, she walks me to my car, we usually hug again, and I leave in my car, she waves to me.

[HALLIEBETH87]

When I do sessions I invite my clt to come with me to our meeting place. We do our thing then when it’s over I walk them back out to the waiting room-opening the door for them.

My t however sits at his computer while I leave.

I like to help clients feel comfortable and at ease and I feel like inviting someone to join me in a space to talk intimate life details ought to feel welcomed and safe.

[AliceKate]

I like that my therapist lets me sit in his room and wait for him without him there. It gives me time to evalutate how I feel that day, in his office, and to get accustomed to it. It also feels a bit like I'm a lion and he lets me have the space before he enters, so as to acknowledge that for the next 50 minutes, this is my office, and he is the guest. Of course I know that last part to be false. And, as can undoubtedly be seen from my profile picture, I'm not lion, but just a grumpy *** cat.