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Default Mar 07, 2023 at 03:38 AM
  #21
I decided to send a follow up email:

Hi T,

I’m just following up on the email I sent you last Monday.

If you don’t want me to email you, please let me know. Not knowing where I stand with you is just making this situation even harder and it is preventing me from moving forward.

I am mindful of the fact that you’re on leave so I wasn’t expecting an in depth response anyway; just some acknowledgment of my feelings would have meant a lot to me.

Anyway, I want to confirm that yes, I do want to be informed should there be any further changes to your leave plans and I would like to be notified upon your return.

retro_chic

I had to use a lot of restraint to not just rip into her. I honestly can’t believe she is treating me like this and I’m really starting to hate her.
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Default Mar 07, 2023 at 05:19 AM
  #22
I had a similar experience happen with T. She said she would only be gone for a few months, then she extended it. On top of that, when she did come back, she was only working a couple of days, and asked me to stay with L because she couldn't offer me the support she felt I needed. At that point, however, I already chose to stay with L as my long-term therapist. T became my backup therapist.

I'm not sure why you are contacting your T on leave? Or expect a reply? Do you have another therapist right now? Maybe look into a backup therapist for the time being.

I do feel for you. I can relate and am empathetic. I hope you find support during this difficult time. I understand you want a reply, AND I just don't think it's appropriate.

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Default Mar 07, 2023 at 05:41 AM
  #23
Quote:
Originally Posted by ScarletPimpernel View Post
I had a similar experience happen with T. She said she would only be gone for a few months, then she extended it. On top of that, when she did come back, she was only working a couple of days, and asked me to stay with L because she couldn't offer me the support she felt I needed. At that point, however, I already chose to stay with L as my long-term therapist. T became my backup therapist.

I'm not sure why you are contacting your T on leave? Or expect a reply? Do you have another therapist right now? Maybe look into a backup therapist for the time being.

I do feel for you. I can relate and am empathetic. I hope you find support during this difficult time. I understand you want a reply, AND I just don't think it's appropriate.
Yeah, really don't need your judgment on a situation you clearly know nothing about.

FYI, before she went on leave, T told me I could email her any life updates while she was away because she'd "love to hear about them". She also told me she be doing the same thing that she did last time she took maternity leave and that she would keep me updated if anything changed. After not hearing from her for three months, I sent T an email checking in as based on last time, I had expected to hear from by then. She replied and informed me she was not coming back until next year but was very vague. I replied asking for clarification as last time she offered a limited amount of online sessions prior to returning to in-person. She informed she would not be offering any sessions until next year.

These emails were very cold and not her usual demeanor at all which was very distressing for me. We had also left things very open ended and didn't really go through a proper termination process as T had assured me we would speak again. That is when I sent the email expressing my feelings as this has been affecting me to the point where I haven't been able to sleep or eat properly for weeks. At no point has T said not to email her. It is up to the therapist to set the boundaries, not the client, hence why I have now specifically asked if she wants me to stop emailing.

I have a new therapist but she cannot offer me closure, only my previous T can.

I suggest you keep your judgments to yourself in the future.
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Default Mar 07, 2023 at 05:54 AM
  #24
I'm sorry you think that I was judgmental. That wasn't my intention!

Best wishes. Truly.

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