Couch 244: Great Expectations

ArtieTheSequal

Looking forward to this evening's CoDA meeting in about 5 minutes. hearing others share about their own experiences with codependency is so helpful. i told L the other day as I'm listening to people share, it's like I'm seeing myself all over everything they say. it wasn't like that last time i went to meetings like 5 years ago. I never knew what to say back then. It's more than a little telling that when I stopped going to meetings 5 years ago, I stopped doing the workbook at the "fearless moral inventory" step. I totally wasn't ready to do that back then. My excuse then was work, but... I could have found a different meeting - I just didn't want to do the hard work of the fearless moral inventory.

I've only been to 2 meetings before tonight's, but already it feels so very freeing talking and sharing with people who are struggling with the same thing. It just explains so much for me. I think tonight I'll introduce myself as a "gratefully recovering codependent" instead of just as codependent. I'm claiming my recovery - as I told L the other day. I think I figured something out - how to "do" things like this - by claiming it, by saying that I'm doing it while I'm doing it - instead of saying "I will do it tomorrow" or whatever. I claim it now and I do it now.

I don't know if I'm making any sense so I'll hush and go get my coda books and get ready for the meeting.