Couch 244: Great Expectations

Scarlet, I'm sorry your sister seems reluctant to celebrate, especially considering that you planned it around her availability. I hope she comes around. But it sounds like you're doing a great job of honoring your dad and doing things to make him happy! I imagine it means a lot to him.

Well done, LT!

I'm impressed that you stuck to it.
Hope you can do something to celebrate your achievement.

Congrats LT! I'm so glad you were able to complete it and that you're feeling better as a result!

Congrats, LT! That resting heart rate is a huge win! Great job keeping it up for a month! I always poop out after a few days because i feel marginally better i.e., not standing so close to the rim of the volcano. I deserve better.

Thanks, Lost! That's a good idea to do something to celebrate.

Thanks, Scarlet!

Thanks, Una! I've tried numerous times before, and it wouldn't last that long. I was started to do better with it shortly before the pandemic hit. And then, well...


With the resting heart rate, for a bit there, it was going down daily. I joked to Dr. T that he wouldn't be seeing me 60 days from now, as my heart rate would have gone down to 0 (of course, it levels off at some point!) I also don't fully trust how Fitbit calculates it (I think it's based on sleeping heart rate or something).

Hi Couch,

Hope you're all doing well.
Just wondering whether it's normal to feel especially drained after a couple of consecutive heavy sessions.

The question I want to ask R is 'How can I be in this space of understanding, and feeling the grief, without losing my mind?'

I think this understanding has taken away a protective layer I needed.

I played pickleball today - we just dodged a bunch of storms here and we were not sure we would be able to play

Hugs, Lost. I think it's totally normal. I've heard it called a "therapy hangover." I've felt really wiped out before after an intense session, where I struggle to do work, for example. Like all my brainpower has been used up.

That seems like a good question to ask R. I hope she can support you through that.

hey couchies, hugs/head nods all around. Back to my writing...

I have to take nap after almost every session. I'm just wiped out.

Thank you both! I think it's the designers who are the talented ones haha, I just follow their directions! These are enjoyable to make because the gratification is pretty immediate; I can make 2 in one evening.

Woo hoo! Congrats LT! I imagine that is good incentive to keep it up. I have kind of slacked off walking myself lately, I've been spending so much time writing. But today I got in a mile and a half, anyway. Hopefully I will do better tomorrow!

Agreed that therapy is hard! Sounds like you had some good insights.

Thanks, Artie! Funny, I had slacked off a bit in my writing in exchange for walking. But I finally submitted my third memoir assignment last night. It's great you're doing all that writing. And a mile and a half is great! I wasn't going to walk today, then ended up doing a mile around 8 pm--advantage of Daylight Saving Time.

Way to go at getting another memoir assignment submitted, write on!

I've written/submitted 4 pieces to the private FB group for the writing your way home course just this past week. only one was a poem; the others were more like essays. The floodgates have opened, and I can't stop! The facilitator gives very thought-provoking prompts which helps. I was telling L about one of them today, the prompt was to write about our relationship with truth. That's something I've really been examining since I've been seeing her again; how I like to think of myself as this honest person but really I'm a big fat liar (this, mostly to myself). It was an eye-opening piece of writing for me. It's so much easier for me to think through my fingers on the keyboard than it is for me to talk about what's in my head.

It felt good to walk today. I'm going to get up early tomorrow and get out there again, before I sit down at my keyboard, and my goal is to hit 2 miles. My heel spur has been bothering me the last couple of days so I don't want to push it; I'm gonna wear my big ol' boot to bed tonight that usually helps.

Thanks LT and Scarlet.

R and I ended up having an interesting conversation about meeting needs towards the end of our most recent session.

'It's about identifying what you need, and then finding a way to meet that need.'

'After last session, I felt like I needed to lie down...I didn't, but I felt that need.'

'The other part is learning to listen to that need.'

She offered a way of expressing the question 'What do I need?' that doesn't cause me to freeze.

'What do I need right now to feel OK?'

It's a subtle difference, but somehow much easier to reach for.

Well done on the challenge. Knew you could do it!!!!

Thank you for taking the time to reply EM. I'm sorry I'm only replying now.

I actually don't know how to fix things. He said he would get back to me but didn't actually reply back to my message for around a week. Then I sent a follow up saying I was okay with ending as he hadn't replied back yet. Nothing stopping me from booking a one off session on his website, but I haven't done that yet. It's been two weeks and I haven't seen him.

I had a intro session with Norman's T. She was nice but she wanted me to come weekly too for the first the first 6 sessions. I just need to know I can leave at any point, but it feels like being locked into a contract..