Where to start when starting with new T after years with old

Elio · Oct 04, 2023 at 09:23 AM

In short for those that don't know - my T of 8 years closed her practice somewhat unexpectedly. I have shopped around for a new T and have settled on 2 potentials. I am seeing both of them for now as neither have more than one time a week available and they both bring something different to the table. I'm not sure which, if either, I will actually stay with in the long run.

My question, when starting over, has anyone every written up a brief outline of your life and given it to a new T to try to bring them up to speed a bit quicker? More along the lines of the headlines of the events; a timeline of events; or the table of contents of your live than the details:

When born, how old parents at birth, siblings and when they were born, major events - like moves; or years of bullying or divorce, important relationships, moves.

If yes, how did it go? Did they even read it?

AnaWhitney · Oct 04, 2023 at 12:10 PM

It’s your therapy and you should start it whatever way you like!
Personally I think I’d find writing things like that down very non personal, in early days I’d want to see if there’s any connection with the therapist so I’d probably want to actually chat and communicate those things.
I’ve used writing to tell my T difficult things but that was after I knew we connected.
In saying that, wouldn’t it be handy for Ts to have a little timeline of events at hand when talking to clients. Maybe they make them anyway? Who knows
Best of luck with starting again

ScarletPimpernel · Oct 04, 2023 at 01:07 PM

I did just that with L. I wrote her up a general synopsis of my life, synptoms, and conditions. I also told her what I want to work on. She said it was so helpful for her and it made her want to work with me. I typed up a timeline of my traumas and major events like a year ago. We started going through it, however, things have gotten in the way and halted it.

I figured that I'd rather put it all out there and be rejected at the start, then get attached and find out later on that she wasn't capable of helping me (like ex-T).

East17 · Oct 13, 2023 at 07:17 AM

"I did just that with L. I wrote her up a general synopsis of my life, synptoms, and conditions. I also told her what I want to work on. She said it was so helpful for her and it made her want to work with me. I typed up a timeline of my traumas and major events like a year ago. We started going through it, however, things have gotten in the way and halted it.
I figured that I'd rather put it all out there and be rejected at the start, then get attached and find out later on that she wasn't capable of helping me (like ex-T)."

I did similar to this with my T. A brief outline of the most important things I wanted to cover, especially the stuff I knew I'd find it really difficult to talk about. It gave her an idea of what I would be bringing to therapy, and in our initial discussion, gave me an idea of whether I thought I could work with her or not. It helped to establish each other's expectations up front.

Exoskeleton · Oct 14, 2023 at 07:44 PM

I think that's a really good idea (to write an essay with the main points). I'm also about to start with a new therapist and she actually sent me a pretty in depth questionnaire which I found very helpful. It asked questions about my childhood and upbringing, about my education, about my relationship with my family over time. And many more questions too. I found it very helpful to have these prompts. One of the questions was also something along the lines of "why are you seeking therapy right now?" or "what do you hope to achieve in therapy?". I thought that was really helpful too.

It's the first time I've ever begun therapy with a questionnaire and I definitely found it to be a good tool. Now I feel that, when we meet next week, the therapist will already have a good sense of my main issues etc and it won't feel so overwhelming trying to explain to her what I'm seeking there. Since it doesn't sound like either of your potential new therapists sent you a questionnaire, I think that writing an essay for them is definitely a really good idea.

Therapy reviewed · Oct 20, 2023 at 02:50 AM

Personally I'm a fan of my unconscious knowing exactly what to say. But a fan of ore planning. To contrived

Elio · Oct 20, 2023 at 12:23 PM

so far I have not written anything up. It is tiresome for them not to know the general life history... ... it has seemed like too much work to write something up.

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Where to start when starting with new T after years with old

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Therapy reviewed Member Member Since Sep 2022 Location: Uk Posts: 114 1 1 hugs given	Oct 20, 2023 at 02:50 AM #6 Personally I'm a fan of my unconscious knowing exactly what to say. But a fan of ore planning. To contrived
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Elio ............... Member Since Sep 2006 Location: in my head Posts: 2,911 17 8,779 hugs given	Oct 20, 2023 at 12:23 PM #7 so far I have not written anything up. It is tiresome for them not to know the general life history... ... it has seemed like too much work to write something up.
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