Is this a weird thing to be asked

I am being evaluated for diagnosis currently. I’m just a bit thrown by the psychologist and what she asked me. I don’t want to talk about SA, I thought it was enough to say yes it happened. I understand the purpose of questions like who was it (as it can be worse if it’s a family member, parent etc.) and how old were you as it’s all relevant. I was willing to give certain information.

However, she then asked me specifically And I shut down. Am I being oversensitive? I just never expected to be asked for such detail. I feel like she thinks I’m a liar and now I have sort of shut down and feel like maybe I am a liar and if I wasn’t, then I should have just been able to answer like a normal person.

I’m kind of just numb and feel like a stupid liar because I don’t even feel anything at all. I have avoided this topic with T since I blurted it out early on in our sessions, and had some scarily strong fearful feelings afterwards. I never got past that it happened and have avoided it ever since. I tend to share with her how things go with the pdocs and psychologist as she is my only support but I don’t think I can talk about this particular part of the assessment with her.

Is the psychologist out of order or is this a normal thing to ask someone? And how the heck could it even affect my diagnosis ? Do you think she thinks I am lying? I sort of do, and I thought I had got past that.
Posting a lot recently, I am sorry. I just feel like I can’t do any of this

I would be off put. I don't know if it'll effect your diagnosis. I don't think she thinks you're lying. Maybe trying to assess if it's PTSD?

Ugh, I'm sorry you were asked that. I'd think many people would be triggered by that. For one, that seems like more detail than is necessary for a diagnosis.

Two:

no they are not out of line for asking you for personal details about things you yourself have reported to them have happened to you.

it can affect your diagnosis because there are many mental disorders that include trauma and abuse, and how a person is affected by their experiences.

just relax, breath and tell the truth. when they ask these yes and no questions just say yes or no. if they ask you to elaborate, just answer their questions as honestly as you can.

My T didn't use them words. Was much more gentle about asking for details. For those of us with ptsd those are quite triggering words.

But it’s hard to answer honestly when I have to have such a battle about it first! I can FEEL like I am a liar so easily and like there is nothing wrong with me, no diagnosis, I am just defective and was made wrong and it’s all my fault that I exist the way I do in the world and that anything else is just me lying. I even feel like I’m lying about symptoms and I genuinely can’t gauge things because nothing seems real to me.

I’ve figured out this is why I was numb because her question really tipped be back into that frame of mind, and after a couple of days of nothing, I was just crying because and I haven’t felt like that since before I started therapy. Even when I was crying, I felt like my sadness was fake, and I only knew I was actually crying because I could feel the tears running down my face.

What I’m trying to say is it’s hard to answer questions honestly when you are so full of doubt about your own experiences, symptoms, emotions etc.
I don’t trust myself and there must be a reason for that, I must know deep down that I can’t be trusted. So how can I answer honestly when I always have this battle going on

To put it bluntly.. Just go with the "lies" they will take you somewhere..

Do you think so ? For the assessment only ?
I managed to get some of this out to my T earlier. Thank god things feel ok again and I’ve stopped having bad feelings towards her. Thank you everyone here as you’ve all helped me big time while those bad feelings were stopping me from being able to connect with her, leaving me lost.

I'm glad you were able to feel more connected with your T, AnaWhitney.

I used to think that I was faking or lying about my symptoms. And I would downplay my traumas. I think I was somewhat lucky because at that time I was immersed in the mental health community, so I was surrounded by people who had experienced what I was experiencing. Even feeling like I was faking or lying. Over time, I was able to own my own experiences and symptoms for a lot of things. However, PTSD symptoms and experiences were the hardest for me to own. Still is. It took L going throughly over a diagnostic test with me in order for me to accept that I suffer from PTSD.

Just go with whatever is present. Even if you feel like it's a lie. It could be anything from numbing to disassociation or denial. All are normal to experience. It's okay if you haven't found your truth yet.

Thank you Scarlet, this was so helpful and validating and helped me explain things to the psychologist and to my surprise she said she already knew I couldn’t report accurately because I was ‘disconnected’. I have no idea what that means but I was so relieved when I felt like she got it and didn’t think I was just being difficult or lying.
So anyone know what being disconnected means ? 😂

disconnected means different things depending upon what the health condition or disorder is.

general examples -

in my daughters schizophrenia disorder it means she has lost touch with reality.

in depression it means a person feels nothing but sadness and suicidal

in multiple sclerosis it means my nerves are not working correctly.

in personality disorders it can mean psychosis (hallucinations/ delusions, loss of touch with whats real.)

in PTSD it means a person's emotional responses are sort of muted, blunted down, The victims can explain in great details what happened to them without actually feeling it again on an emotional level.

when I went through a trauma I was able to explain to the authorities what I witnessed and how I felt during the traumatic event as it was happening,

but at that moment of questioning just answering on automatic physical verbal responses, and not feeling what I was saying.

the police asked me all kinds of questions from why I was where i was, to my sex life and how my spouse was related to me all of it, I was able to answer with no problems at all because I was feeling nothing. I was on automatic. not emotional. I was just answering the questions as if someone asked me if I wanted a glass of water, or ordering a meal. just off the top of my head no care in the world at a distance answering as if the questions had no relation to me at all,

my wife joked with me after I was a bit more normal saying "gee I should have asked you if you really liked that red dress of mine and you would have answered" lol and yes I would have just spouted off the answer as if someone had given me a truth serum shot what I thought of her in a particular dress I hated her in lol I was feeling no emotions and in that lack of affect state of mind theres no telling lies and such, just automatic answering lol

anyway what Im trying to say is that what disconnected means depends upon what the assessment is for and the meaning of "disconnected" will be depended upon what it means for that specific disorder or condition.