[Gasplessy]

My psychoterapist allowed me to use emails during pauses, and today i sent one where i mentioned

Possible trigger:

suicidal thoughts in details

I am aware it is wrong to threaten (indirectly) however i have been quite desperate for years because of a mix of factors and can't help it

She replied she is worried and I feel stupid and guilty now

I am usually a pretty calm person despite my situation and i pay professional regularly

But

Possible trigger:

i am necesseraly suicidal and sorry

Should i end psychoterapy?

[Therapy reviewed]

I found I tended to send more extreme feelings that were true but maybe exgerated for affect.. Maybe beside I was trying to get that f2f feeling that email doesn't have..

[Nammu]

I think this brings up a good starting place for dialogue. Instead of ending it you could talk deeper about these feelings and from where they are coming from.

[Gasplessy]

Thanks for your replies

[InkyBooky]

For what it's worth I don't think you should end therapy because of this. It sounds like important stuff to talk about and I'm sure your therapist would agree that there's nothing wrong with you for having those feelings or thoughts. They are probably glad you voiced them rather than keeping them to yourself. In the past my therapist has said something like..."I feel worried/concerned right now but I can manage that." It helped to hear their honest feelings, but also that they weren't putting that on me (in which case I might feel sorry or ashamed for mentioning it). Maybe you could ask your therapist about their expression of worry and tell them how that affected you (ie: made you feel ashamed).