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Wise Elder
Member Since Nov 2013
Location: US
Posts: 8,739
(SuperPoster!)
11 7,254 hugs
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#761
Yes, very annoying! But one can hope.
__________________ "Odium became your opium..." ~Epica |
LonesomeTonight, unaluna
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Poohbah
Member Since Feb 2019
Location: NJ
Posts: 1,354
5 1,298 hugs
given |
#762
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LonesomeTonight, ScarletPimpernel
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Human Feeling
Member Since Aug 2011
Location: England
Posts: 5,449
13 3,534 hugs
given |
#763
I had a positively surreal conversation with an international friend this afternoon.
Possible trigger:
Maybe I haven't quite landed from the week I've had, but...shouldn't that conversation have been the other way around? __________________ 'Somewhere up above the great divide Where the sky is wide, and the clouds are few A man can see his way clear to the light 'You have all the grace you need for today, and today is all that matters.' - Steve Austin |
LonesomeTonight, ScarletPimpernel, unaluna, WarmFuzzySocks
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Always in This Twilight
Member Since Feb 2015
Location: US
Posts: 21,616
(SuperPoster!)
9 76.2k hugs
given |
#764
Hugs, Lost. I assume she knows what you're dealing with right now? She should be more aware and sensitive to that.
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underdog is here
Member Since Sep 2011
Location: blank
Posts: 35,049
(SuperPoster!)
13 1 hugs
given |
#765
How would the conversation be backwards? looks like she just wanted to give a heads up if she was not online. Seems thoughtful to me if it was in a situation where people might be concerned. What would it being the other way around look like?
__________________ Please NO @ Selfishness is not living as one wishes to live, it is asking others to live as one wishes to live. Oscar Wilde Well Behaved Women Seldom Make History - Laurel Thatcher Ulrich Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional. |
WarmFuzzySocks
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Human Feeling
Member Since Aug 2011
Location: England
Posts: 5,449
13 3,534 hugs
given |
#766
Thanks, LT.
I don't think she does anniversaries, so she may not be aware. My calendar is a lot for me, so I don't expect anyone else to keep it. (Except R, perhaps.) It was a spike of anxiety that I really didn't need. __________________ 'Somewhere up above the great divide Where the sky is wide, and the clouds are few A man can see his way clear to the light 'You have all the grace you need for today, and today is all that matters.' - Steve Austin |
LonesomeTonight
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Human Feeling
Member Since Aug 2011
Location: England
Posts: 5,449
13 3,534 hugs
given |
#767
SD,
It would have made more sense to me if she'd started with something like "There's a chance I might not be online for a while, because..." Starting the conversation by talking about the terror threat level out of nowhere piled panic on top of the limited capacity I have at the moment. __________________ 'Somewhere up above the great divide Where the sky is wide, and the clouds are few A man can see his way clear to the light 'You have all the grace you need for today, and today is all that matters.' - Steve Austin |
LonesomeTonight, unaluna
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underdog is here
Member Since Sep 2011
Location: blank
Posts: 35,049
(SuperPoster!)
13 1 hugs
given |
#768
I wouldn't have thought of that from either side for me. But glad she got to the reassuring part for you eventually
__________________ Please NO @ Selfishness is not living as one wishes to live, it is asking others to live as one wishes to live. Oscar Wilde Well Behaved Women Seldom Make History - Laurel Thatcher Ulrich Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional. |
atisketatasket, unaluna, WarmFuzzySocks
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Elder Harridan x-hankster
Member Since Jun 2011
Location: Milan/Michigan
Posts: 40,945
(SuperPoster!)
13 68.9k hugs
given |
#769
I guess i would see somebody saying, "i might not be online for a while" as scary or manipulative, trying to get me to ask why. If they know the reason, i would prefer they start with that. My family would make leading, insinuating statements like that, threatening some impending doom that this ungrateful child is pitifully, stupidly oblivious of.
Equal but opposite knee-jerk responses |
LonesomeTonight, LostOnTheTrail, WarmFuzzySocks
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LonesomeTonight, stopdog
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Child of a lesser god
Member Since Jun 2015
Location: Tartarus
Posts: 19,302
(SuperPoster!)
9 12.4k hugs
given |
#770
I am discovering one of the joys of historic houses is the unexpected surprises.
For instance, I had electricians here yesterday to replace a 76 year old subpanel. |
unaluna
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Jersey 4, LonesomeTonight, stopdog, unaluna, WarmFuzzySocks
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underdog is here
Member Since Sep 2011
Location: blank
Posts: 35,049
(SuperPoster!)
13 1 hugs
given |
#771
Wow - exhankster and I are very nearly historic subpanels. Electricity (or lack there of) is one of the joys of an older house - the first thing I had to do when I bought my 120+ yr old house ( at the time it was 90- years old. tempus fugit and all) was upgrade the panel and add about 40 outlets. Old Plumbing and gas lines also have their fun. When it gets really bad - read (it is funny) or watch(myrna loy) Mr. Blandings Builds His Dream House and relate.
__________________ Please NO @ Selfishness is not living as one wishes to live, it is asking others to live as one wishes to live. Oscar Wilde Well Behaved Women Seldom Make History - Laurel Thatcher Ulrich Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional. |
atisketatasket, Jersey 4, LonesomeTonight, unaluna, WarmFuzzySocks
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Child of a lesser god
Member Since Jun 2015
Location: Tartarus
Posts: 19,302
(SuperPoster!)
9 12.4k hugs
given |
#772
I love Mr. Blandings (the film).
The plumbing was all replaced a few years before I bought, so that should be okay. Ex-hankster seems more like an historic gas line to me… |
unaluna
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LonesomeTonight, stopdog, unaluna, WarmFuzzySocks
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Elder Harridan x-hankster
Member Since Jun 2011
Location: Milan/Michigan
Posts: 40,945
(SuperPoster!)
13 68.9k hugs
given |
#773
Well, i am older than the apartment building i live in, now that you mention it. Jiminy Cricket.
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stopdog, WarmFuzzySocks
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Elder Harridan x-hankster
Member Since Jun 2011
Location: Milan/Michigan
Posts: 40,945
(SuperPoster!)
13 68.9k hugs
given |
#774
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stopdog, WarmFuzzySocks
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Human Feeling
Member Since Aug 2011
Location: England
Posts: 5,449
13 3,534 hugs
given |
#775
My friend won't stop with the info about the terror threat level.
I don't know how to handle this. Of course I want her to be safe, but I don't want to know every detail. __________________ 'Somewhere up above the great divide Where the sky is wide, and the clouds are few A man can see his way clear to the light 'You have all the grace you need for today, and today is all that matters.' - Steve Austin |
ScarletPimpernel, unaluna
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Grand Poohbah
Member Since Feb 2019
Location: Toodlepip
Posts: 1,838
5 |
#776
Perhaps her anxiety and fear means that she needs to repeat herself and revisit the subject in order for her to reassure herself or otherwise sort through a stressful situation. She obviously trusts you enough to talk to you about it, there is not necessarily anything specific she needs to hear from you. Being able to listen and having time for her concern is enough.
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Human Feeling
Member Since Aug 2011
Location: England
Posts: 5,449
13 3,534 hugs
given |
#777
We're not talking about it, though.
She's already told me what's going on in an arse-about-face way yesterday. I didn't need her to explain further. __________________ 'Somewhere up above the great divide Where the sky is wide, and the clouds are few A man can see his way clear to the light 'You have all the grace you need for today, and today is all that matters.' - Steve Austin |
unaluna
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Grand Poohbah
Member Since Feb 2019
Location: Toodlepip
Posts: 1,838
5 |
#778
But maybe she needs to talk about it again in whatever form it comes, that what I meant. I think I misunderstood your initial post though. I thought you were struggling with what kind of understanding things to say to her rather than wanting her to shut up with the repetition! Maybe temporarily block her if you feel awkward about asking her to stop talking about the situation? You can explain why you were out of touch at a later date if it's unusual for you to not have daily contact.
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LostOnTheTrail
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Elder Harridan x-hankster
Member Since Jun 2011
Location: Milan/Michigan
Posts: 40,945
(SuperPoster!)
13 68.9k hugs
given |
#779
I heard on the sunday morning tv news shows that there is a threat here in the USA because some people got in, but the US Representative talking about it seemed to want to "blame the current admins policies" rather than tell people to go buy their bread and milk and hunker down. So idk. I just cant get excited anymore. Until they come knocking on my door.
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LostOnTheTrail, ScarletPimpernel
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Poohbah
Member Since Feb 2019
Location: NJ
Posts: 1,354
5 1,298 hugs
given |
#780
I’m looking at my floors and should probably mop them but I’m lazy. I had plans to go to Torrid today in a little while to maybe find some new clothes. The last Torrid I was in was rather small and they had a lot of stuff everywhere and it became overwhelming. I wonder if the other location not too far from me would be less cluttered.
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LonesomeTonight, LostOnTheTrail, ScarletPimpernel, WarmFuzzySocks
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