Couch 248: Curiouser and Curiouser

Perhaps I am getting sentimental in my middle age, but I find it touching that we witness all kinds of changes, troubles, and feelings on this forum amongst our members. It feels quite meaningful that we hear about the office moves, ruptures, endings, new therapists, etc as they unfold along the way. I know about the inner workings of other people's therapy, people on the other side of the world who I have never met, and that feels extraordinary in a way.

Yes, Comrade.

The Internet is many things, but in these communities, we can really come to be there for one another...and that means a huge amount.

Not to get soppy, but I read something a few days ago that resonates in this context.

'We can't save people, but we can love them.'

(I know the L word is loaded for many people, but it takes many forms.)

It's an honour to walk around in someone else's story for a while...and I suppose that's why some people become therapists.

Thanks for bringing that up, and reminding us of what's really important.

Lost

On a less sentimental note, LT is it possible to make a bit of room (pardon the pun) for feelings other than anxiety, dread, apprehension about the office move? I don't mean this to minimise the emotional disturbance you feel now because I think it points to really important stuff, but anxiety so often dwarfs other feelings and will muscle out other possibilities. On a really basic level, the physiological effects of anxiety (racing heart and breath, butterflies, agitation, etc) can also indicate excitement and anticipation and sometimes I think we ascribe anxiety when something else might be happening as well. I don't mean that you are incorrect in how you feel or that you should look on the bright side (ugh), but I imagine that you might have the capacity to feel curious and interested about the room as well as anxious. I think I mean something like seeing the whole picture of your emotions rather than allowing anxiety to have a reductive impact.

I've thought of something similar, too. This forum has often made me feel less alone. And I like being able to support others, along with receiving support. And just hear about others' experiences.

I especially appreciate the Couch, because one of my 'things' is an inability to find the 'right words'.

I don't need them here - thank you all.

Thanks, Comrade. I am a bit curious as to how he'll opt to decorate the office, though he said it should have a very similar feel to it with many of the same items. (I was afraid he'd opt for some totally different theme/vibe.) I doubt the fish will make the cut, but maybe I'll be pleasantly surprised.

And I think if this all goes OK, like if I adjust in a relatively short period of time and realize he's the same person (some may say that's a negative!) and that the therapeutic relationship is the same, maybe it will help me understand that this sort of change isn't the end of the world and that I'm capable of handling such things (as life is full of change).

That was a terrible sentence, but hopefully my point comes across! Also, aside from the initial conflict about the fish, Dr. T has been very patient with me and supportive about the move, despite having plenty of his own stress about it. I forget whether I shared this, but he said the other day that he feels like he's an ship captain in the 1800s trying to steer the ship through a hurricane. How I'm on the ship, as well as other clinicians (like R) who are moving with him (and presumably other clients, though he didn't mention them). But he's the only one who can steer it, and he only has some control. It helped that he shared that. Made it feel more like we're in it together, plus acknowledging his own stress (without diminishing mine).

L told me that fear and excitement come from the same part of the brain.

That's interesting, Scarlet.

Makes a lot of sense.

That’s very interesting. I didn’t know that.

My office chair was falling apart so I went shopping for a new one this morning. I found them 60% off at Office Max so I was able to get a heck of a good deal on a much better chair than I expected to buy!! Just finished putting it together. I do not have to worry about my chair breaking underneath me anymore haha. That old one was getting quite rickety. Nothing is made to last anymore; you kids get off my lawn. ha. (It was bonus week on my paycheck yesterday, plus I had like 4 hours of overtime, so it was a no-brainer.)

That is interesting!