Couch 249: The Self Care Couch

Yeah we got that!!!

Your funny

Yes, exactly. Sorry your med guy said that.

I've tried Cymbalta in the past and am trying to recall whether it made me sleepy. I know once I upped the dose, it caused twitching in my legs. And seemed to have negative psychological effects, but I can't recall whether I was on a second med at the time (that p-doc liked to switch around my meds a bunch).

I did have that effect from Celexa and one of the other SSRIs (I know Cymbalta is an SNRI). Could you try taking it at night maybe? For me on meds in general, some side effects go away after a bit and others linger. How long have you been taking it?

Ha! I did think of the "D" thing when I was typing it, but the "B" didn't register till you said something. Funny, too, that B is ex-T...

Haha...took me a minute!

I get how the positive attitude can be annoying.


With L, it sounds like she was validating and responding to specific things ex-T did rather than ex-T as a whole. I hope you found it validating. I'm glad she encourages you to talk to T. I appreciate that Dr. T is fine with me consulting with R, even at times when he's not on vacation.

I've been taking it for two weeks and he wants me to double the dose next week. I'm not doing that because I'd be comatose at that point. I'm also taking Wellbutrin. I want to try ketamine, which he does, but I don't know if we're at that point yet and there are some logistical things I'd have to work out in order to try it.

There was not a single seq in there. I honestly did not understand any of it

Boy i try to be succinct and instead i just suc

But it was deep and profound and insightful and even gut-wrenching. Too bad you missed it. I will try harder next time not to suc so much when i seq.

I think it’s the -cinct part you need, not the suc-, if you want to be seq-.

Maybe stopdog has higher standards than the lawyers on Court TV?

Now i dont understand what YOU are saying!

If SD is better, then why isnt SHE on tv?

I have a face made for radio and Rachel Maddow is already there representing the L in lgbtq

Had a really productive session with Dr. T today. He said today that we're both using different language to talk about transference and attachment, which makes it easier to discuss. That he thinks it stems from the "love" stuff discussions. How before that, it would seem like I was making a request of him, but now, it's more that I'm sharing feelings. I said it feels like we're each adapting to other, and he agreed.

I admitted how the younger part of me wished I could go on vacation with him. He said he was impressed that I was able to share that. And seemed accepting of it, where I think a couple years ago, he'd have reacted weirdly to it (I also wouldn't have said it then, for that reason). He said he knew I'd never actually ask him to do that. That we could just examine what's behind that want.

Later, we were talking about how maybe the high school journalism teacher I was attached to was the actual starting point to the transference stuff. How maybe he met some need that my parents didn't meet. I said he seemed to believe in me and my abilities in a way they didn't. Dr. T said it was like my first hit of cocaine. And we discussed some other stuff around that (perhaps I'll post in IST later). It's given me a lot to think about.

The -cinct part is the part where you join things together. You know, logically.

Cinctus is a belt in Latin.

I should know to trust that theres a method to your madness.

LT - thats it! Thats why my fantasy of t cutting his lawn with me in a Snuggli. I was seeking attachment. But with my dad. My mother - geez, she just bumped into me like a couple three times a year. Seriously.

I have a similar fantasies, too! One, I wish I was small enough to fit in her pocket so she can carry me around. Another is that I wrap my arms around her ankle and never let go (I actually did that with my therapist when I was 14).

I'm really glad your session went well, LT. I bet that was really good timing for you, that you needed it. It's also a relief? that Dr. T is start to understand and accept transference.

Interesting that it was about cutting the lawn, so like a mundane chore. So like just a part of his everyday life. Which I get. Did you ever share that with your T? I forget.

It felt kind of liberating to share it. I said how if I didn't share things like that, they were still in my head. But I got the message from my parents to not talk about stuff like that, of course.

Yes, it was a weekly summer fantasy! Then when you consider our relative sizes. Like sammy davis toting the former fat al roker. Well except t wasnt that small and i wasnt that big. T would just look at me, dictionary definition picture of "quizzically"!

Thanks, Scarlet! Agree that it's a relief and good timing for this session. I was worried how it was going to go.

Hugs/head nods all around as wanted/needed/appropriate.