Who do you call? MIND-BUSTERS!

My general question is when exactly is a good time to make a "crisis call" and to whom would be a good choice?

I have the people at the center I get treatment at who will take urgent calls and if they don't pick up, they usually call back pretty quickly (longest I've had to wait is 30 minutes). A lot of the time it's even my CM or T which is cool because they know me, and through these calls some other folks working the line have learned a lot about me too (that's probably a bad thing).

And then there's all the other hot lines: NH Rapid Response (these guys got my then CM and decided to throw me in a crisis apartment that had bed bugs though), 988, LGBTQ Help Center, the crisis text line/741741, NAMI NH, and probably others I don't even know about.

I like calling my CMHC when it's something I think they should probably know about in the moment and something that I need someone who knows me to handle it (ie suicidal ideation, self-harm. Stuff other guys'll send out the emergency folk and lock me up for when they know my threshold for ER should be at a higher "crisis level" than a lot of other people otherwise I'd be IP forever lol).

Sometimes I don't want to bother them though, or it's something I don't particularly care for them to know what exactly is going on. I did get a little lecture though for not calling before ODing on over the counter stuff on two occasions in between appointments.

I also feel like sometimes calling ANYONE is straight up pointless. I know they're just going to ask me which coping skills/grounding techniques I can use. If the environment is the trigger, they'll ask me to come up with another place I can go. And a lot of times I know the answers to that, and I know I shouldn't act on anything harmful, but I also kinda think I should because I shouldn't. I sometimes answer their questions "journal, listen to music, cook, go for a walk, maybe get ONE BAG of the tajin apple rings (best snack ever), go to the park, hang out at the library..." and I absolutely do not do any of that. I'm trying to work on using healthy coping skills and distress tolerance skills. Still in "undeserving of any sort of wellbeing" mindset though. Opposite action. Calling anyone feels like claiming defeat and instead of looking for help it's "I'm failing at helping myself."


Kinda long, but I guess details are needed to show more of the picture and avoid incorrect assumptions. Basically, gazillion of hotlines out there (including one specific to my CMHC where many times I get to talk to someone that knows me), who to call and when?

I have my T I can call, that usually actually helps, just as an actual human connection. I have clear rules and I know it's never inappropriate within those, that helps, just clear boundaries around that sort of contact.


Other than that, I understand the thought it's pointless to reach out to helplines and such. I have used this kind of service exactly once (found out T had cancer and didn't want to reach out to anyone in my life). It was as you described them helping me come up with plans of what to do, not actual support or even some relief. But I didn't feel it was me claiming defeat, I was able to reach out to someone where I knew I could somehow get some form of coping thing met. It helps to just be listened to sometimes. It doesn't fix anything, but it helps to get through the time until I can see someone.

According to my safety plan, I call L first (or whoever is on call for her if she's on a leave). If I can't wait for her to call back, then I call 988 the suicide and Crisis hotline (I think for all of the US). If that's not enough, then I go to the hospital.