Love in the therapy relationship

I realize I never updated here. Life got in the way.

I did share what I wrote with him. It went fine. We've had some more back and forth journaling since then where he more fully explained his stance. One of the things he mentioned is that saying it to a client doesn't typically help. If you don't feel the truth behind the words, it will feel hollow. I think he'd rather I feel the truth, not hear it. The thing is I do feel it. I just don't trust myself enough to believe myself. I've tried to explain this further to him. I think by having this back and forth conversation, we'll more fully understand each other.

Of course this is complicated by the fact that he told me at our last session that he's moving out of state, probably at the beginning of the year. I've been seeing P since 2016, a good chunk of that at 3x week, so this feels like a huge loss. There's going to be this hole in my week where I get to sit in a room with him for 50 minutes. I'm still trying to process that he's actually leaving and our relationship will end. We may be able to continue with virtual sessions once a week, but virtual is not the same and I got the impression the continuing virtual sessions were to make sure we had a good ending, not necessarily as an ongoing thing. I don't think I've full absorbed this information yet. Life is not fair.