sharing my T

I just got off the phone with my best friend, and she told me that she referred her cousin to my T. Her cousin has an appointment with him when he returns from his upcoming vacation. His specialty is trauma, and her cousin has PTSD -and she knows how good he's been for me, and she wants her cousin to have a good therapist.

Ewwwwww......this feels SO weird to me. The mature me is happy that her cousin will be able to get good treatment. The totally immature part of me is really upset. I really don't want to hear what he's like with his other clients - but I will be wondering and I don't know if I can resist asking. I just started feeling really safe with him, and I feel like he's "mine" - even though I know he has other clients, they are just sort of imaginary people to me. And I'm sure this is because of my SA experience with a counselor in the past, but I'm really scared he will do something inappropriate with her, and I'll hear about it. I have NO reason to think that would happen - I think it's just fears bubbling up from the past.

I know I'm being immature and crazy, but I just had to get it out.

(((((((((((((( earthmama )))))))))))))))
Sharing our Ts with other people can be hard, I hope it all works out for you and your friends cousin.

((((((((((((( earthmama ))))))))))))))

ooooh, it felt good to come on here just now to find supportive replies. I was about to add a disclaimer to my original post asking people to please not yell at me, because I KNOW I'm being a big baby.

Thanks for the hugs.

Oh no way I could handle that one! I'd be too tempted to compare stories...but then I'd go in there and start in on him about whatever and therapy would be ruined.

Be better than me

EM - glad you could post about it and 'get it out' of you. I do understand.
((((((((((((((((((EM))))))))))))))))))))))))))

well you have evry right to worry i mean with past events and all it is perfectly normal to worry and yeah the whole sharing your T might be complicated but wht can you do

i just had a weepy 20 minute phone call with T. I never, ever cry - but the fear of losing him and the safe relationship we have developed is SO big.

I do think I feel better for now. I'm sure he thinks this is GREAT material for therapy - brings in the SA issue we've only touched on here and there, and brings up all of my issues with trust/safety/relationships that we're constantly working on in therapy.

He's so gentle and understanding and non-judgmental. I feel like he "heard" me and I do feel better for now. Whew.

can you have him call me?briefly? i will not tell you what he says or how he is... i promise.

i would never want to have anyone i knew seeing my T. i could not cope.. so if you're a big baby then so am i.

i am glad you talked with him... and that you feel better

I'm glad you can share these feelings with your T. It takes a mature and insightful person to recognize conflicting feelings. My wish for you is that this situation will help build even more trust with your T and eventually a greater feeling of security.