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Anonymous1532
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Default Jun 17, 2008 at 07:01 PM
  #1
Does anyone else avoid talking about therapy outside of therapy? I have only told a few of my closest friends that I'm in therapy and I never discuss why, or how it's going, or anything like that. I was wondering if people actually talk to the people in their lives about their therapy, the importance of the therapy relationship to them, etc.?

I don't. I guess I like to have it all compartmentalized so that I don't have to think about it or answer questions about it the rest of the time. But it is strange to not share something that is so important to me and that takes up so much of my mental energy with the people who I am closest to...for example, not being able to explain why I'm preoccupied, in a bad mood, etc. when it relates to therapy. I sometimes wonder if that secrecy hurts those relationships. But maybe there is some advantage to working on some stuff separately in therapy and not having to "taint" RL relationships with it. Just curious how others handle this.
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Default Jun 17, 2008 at 08:04 PM
  #2
I would only talk about this stuff with IRL people who are also in therapy. The therapeutic relationship is unique and can feel pretty bizarre at times.

I think this is why we use psychcentral. People here really "get it".

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Default Jun 17, 2008 at 08:15 PM
  #3
I rarely talk about therapy IRL , I am very open that I am in therapy but I refuse to share any of the details, I find this site very helpful because I feel safe discussing details about therapy here.

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Default Jun 17, 2008 at 08:18 PM
  #4
I do share what I learn from my pain management therapy...especially here! Talking about therapy outside of therapy? Most people just don't understand, and don't have need to hear.

I just returned from an MS society meeting on adaptive/assistive devices and technology...and it was great to be in a group of people who fully understood each other. Talking about therapy outside of therapy?

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Default Jun 17, 2008 at 08:33 PM
  #5
Therapy is personal and private. I don't care to share much. And those who aren't in therapy often don't have a realistic understanding of it.

I once told T about a family member who thinks therapy is a waste of time ("take a pill !!"), and she said "Oh, family never 'gets' therapy.". I think she's right and I like keeping it between her and me. It's definitely on my mind a lot, but I don't talk about it. I think about it and / or journal my thoughts.
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Default Jun 18, 2008 at 11:47 AM
  #6
I talk about it a little with different people... I have one friend who I typically catch up with after therapy. We talk about all kinds of stuff... Commiserating about relationships going bad seems to be a fairly recent thing. I talk to her a bit about therapy... And she talks to me a bit about her therapy. So yeah, I talk to her a bit...

I've told a couple of other people I'm in therapy too. Mostly... They ask if he is any good and if he is taking on new patients lol. There doesn't seem to be so much stigma about that where I am. My officemate knows I have a 'doctors appointment' every Monday and she hasn't asked about it anymore than that, but I think she has figured it out. I don't talk to her about it much more than that, though. Though she has asked me a bit about getting a therapist for her friend who seems to be becoming progressively more obsessive-compulsive...

I don't say much about the personal aspect to people IRL. But then... I have enough difficulties talking about personal stuff IRL. Email is much easier... And so are anonymous message boards I guess.
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Default Jun 18, 2008 at 12:25 PM
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I don't talk about therapy to others. Two close friends know that I've gone to therapy but thats about it. My H knows that I go to therapy but I don't really discuss it with him, mainly because it makes him very defensive and he just tells me I don't need it.

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Default Jun 18, 2008 at 12:56 PM
  #8
My boss, who is a good friend, knows I go to therapy. But I don't discuss the content with her. She used to go to family therapy with her daughter, so she appreciates its value. My mother and 2 sisters also know I go to therapy. Occasionally, I've talked a little bit it about it, something like this, "yesterday, I told my therapist this..." And then we will discuss whatever I told him, usually practical stuff (e.g. how the divorce is going), not stuff about the therapeutic relationship, or how I miss my T when he goes away, etc. Both of my sisters have gone to see therapists at one time in their life or another, and know how helpful it can be.

In general, my therapy is just too private and personal to share (e.g. trauma work).

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Default Jun 18, 2008 at 04:58 PM
  #9
One close friend knows I go to therapy and my sister knows but I would never discuss details with her, ever. My family of origin just wouldn't get it because they are too into preserving the status quo. My family knows because I am a mom and frankly, I have no privacy in this house. LOL My H is extremely supportive at this point but knows I need my privacy surrounding certain aspects of my therapy and I do not share all details with him. My kids all know my T by first name and only the youngest has never met him. OMG when they are independent adults I can just hear them talking about "my mother's therapist." In a way, I feel like T is an extension of my family. He's certainly in my business enough to be! LOL

My SIL is a T and I am fortunate enough to be able to share some very intense stuff with her. She is an amazing support for me and I don't think I would have survived thus far without her. However, even she doesn't know all. Talking about therapy outside of therapy? Talking about therapy outside of therapy? Talking about therapy outside of therapy?

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Default Jun 18, 2008 at 09:26 PM
  #10
i have a friend who is in therapy as well who has a similar history to mine, and I do share things with her that happen in therapy.

Some other people know I'm in therapy, but don't know the details. I really don't think anyone who isn't in therapy would have any way to understand what goes on in that room.
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Default Jun 19, 2008 at 01:00 AM
  #11
I kind of make it a point to be open about being in therapy since part of my job is to fight the stigma of mental illness. There have been times when I think I've revealed too much and regretted it later. I try to be pretty tight lipped about it now.
There is one person I really wish I could share the therapy experience with...my husband, but I don't think he wants to know. I think it kind of frightens him.
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Default Jun 19, 2008 at 02:36 AM
  #12
In all the therapy I have had over the years, why bother t alk about it.

It is self help.

After all.

nightbird

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