Has anyone ever had a close friend become their therapist? Not a therapist who becomes a friend, but to have a close friend, who takes you in as a patient.

[pegasus]

I have a few psych friends who I talk with, but I wouldn't pay to talk with em!

<font color="purple">I'm usualy the one who plays the therapist.
Believe it or not this place is the only one were I feel comfortable talking about stuff. </font>

That's against the code of ethics. Dual relationship. There are so many things that would go wrong.

[Fuzzybear]

I think it could easily go wrong and you might lose your friend through burn out, boundary issues, all sorts of reasons.... I don't mean you, I mean anyone ....and lose T at the same time.

Is the friend you're thinking of a qualified T? (only answer if you want to of course)

[chaotic13]

Based on previous discussions here on PC about this, I'm not sure they can be both. Whether they can switch gears from friend to therapist, I don't know. I think knowledgeable friends can provide good support for therapy. However a good therapist needs to be a 3rd party to a person's daily drama. IMO

He's qualified.

It's more an idea I'm musing with... I'd be too scared to risk a very good friendship I think. I like talking to him and getting his advice, I'd just be worried to ruin what we already have. It's nothing I'm too serious with going ahead with- things would be better with him remaining a close friend I could turn to when I need a shoulder/advice. Just wanted to see what everyone thought.



And so the hunt for a new T continues.

[sunrise]

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
Griffe said:
Has anyone ever had a close friend become their therapist?

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">Yes, this exact thing happened to me when I was in college. When he became my therapist, he stopped our friendship, and we stopped seeing each other outside of his office. It was awful. It was very hurtful. I was too young to know what was going on or understand my feelings. I felt almost "tricked" into it. (I didn't realize he was a therapist when he was my friend.) I really felt the loss of his friendship, but he just wanted to provide therapy and I guess didn't mind the loss of our friendship, or at least he never expressed that to me. (It would have been very healing if he did.) I know he probably made this change because he was looking out for me and had my best interests at heart, but this was a hard transition for me, and I don't think he should have done it. He was more valuable to me as a friend than as a therapist. I think if he believed I should see a therapist, he should have suggested that to me and given me the name of someone to see. I don't believe I saw him for many sessions (maybe 6?) because I couldn't deal with all my feelings (I think I was angry at him but didn't know it.) I had not thought of this for many years, but it came up fairly early in sessions with my current T. It was something from my past I had not understood or dealt with, and it presented itself out of nowhere to be dealt with in therapy. My current T helped me mourn the loss of that friendship. He also said it was quite an unusual case--for a friend to transition to being one's T--and that if there is role switching, it is usually the other way around--a therapist becomes a friend.

Griffe, is this happening to you now? It's hard, isn't it?

[Simcha]

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
Griffe said:
Has anyone ever had a close friend become their therapist? Not a therapist who becomes a friend, but to have a close friend, who takes you in as a patient.

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">
Definitely not, and a definite no-no with professional therapists. If your friend is suggesting this, tell them you are sorry, but you value your friendship too much to allow them to be your therapist. There are boundaries that every therapist must abide by, and one of them is they can't be your friend.

[MINIME]

I have a friend I went to college with. SHe and I are best friends. SHe finished college I ended up adopting my neices and dropping out. She is a masters level therapist now. She always tries to "therapitize" me. I just laugh at her. She uses me as examples a lot in her work. It doesnt bother me I would never ever want to be her client. It wouldnt work out. I know she would feel the same. It would feel alot different to be her client then it does with my real therapists. It woulnt feel as safe because of us being friends.

[MissCharlotte]

I have a family member who is a T and she is also a really good friend. But she was the one who referred me to a T! In general I don't think it's appropriate for a close friend to be impartial enough to be a therapist, as well.