[Martina]

My husband and I met with my psych nurse today. She has been handling my meds and therapy for just over a year - I have Bipolar II and Borderline. A lot of my issues stem from my relationship, so she asked me to bring him along.

After the session, she asked when she could see us again. I started saying that I booked the appointments every-other week, one for me as an individual, then the next for us as a couple.

My psych nurse says I don't need to see her individually since I'm stable now, and we need to work on the marriage.

I'm not so sure I agree. What do I do? I booked the appointments like she said, but what if I need more individual help? Why would she cut me off, does she really think I'm doing that well?

[mixedup_emotions]

Originally Posted by Martina

My husband and I met with my psych nurse today. She has been handling my meds and therapy for just over a year - I have Bipolar II and Borderline. A lot of my issues stem from my relationship, so she asked me to bring him along.

After the session, she asked when she could see us again. I started saying that I booked the appointments every-other week, one for me as an individual, then the next for us as a couple.

My psych nurse says I don't need to see her individually since I'm stable now, and we need to work on the marriage.

I'm not so sure I agree. What do I do? I booked the appointments like she said, but what if I need more individual help? Why would she cut me off, does she really think I'm doing that well?

If you are concerned about dropping the individual therapy, then you might want to talk to her about it. She's not going to know whether or not you're ok with it unless you tell her.

[googley]

Hi,
You should check with her and see what she intends. She might intend that you and your husband work for a while now that you are stable since that would be a good time for you to do it. Just because you go to couples therapy doesn't mean that you couldn't in the future if things become unstable go back part time or full time to individual therapy. You should check with her and see if this is an option. That might make you feel better that she is not dumping your individual therapy, more she is just moving it to another focus. Good Luck.

[sunrise]

My psych nurse says I don't need to see her individually since I'm stable now, and we need to work on the marriage.

I'm not so sure I agree.

Sounds like there is a difference of opinion of whether you should continue therapy or not. I think you should discuss this with her without your husband present. You have been in individual therapy with her for quite some time and I think it is rather abrupt to terminate your therapy without discussing it with you first and getting your input. I think she should have asked to discuss this with you privately, not handed you the news while at your couples session.

I hope you can have a good talk with her and come to a decision that works for you. If you don't speak to her about this and come to resolution, it might impact your ability to work with her in couples (because her actions might affect your ability to trust her).

(By the way, when I was doing couples therapy with my H, I alternated with individual sessions and that worked well.)

Good luck.

added later:

My psych nurse says I don't need to see her individually since I'm stable now, and we need to work on the marriage.

This statement bothers me. Who is she to say that you no longer need to be in therapy because you're stable? There are lots of reasons for being in therapy and maybe your reason for being there is much larger than just being stable. I have been in therapy for 2.5 years and never been unstable, but I sure needed therapy! Also, you know best what you need right now. It is not up to PNP to tell you that you need to work on the marriage right now. You are the client, you call the shots. Maybe your way of working on the marriage would be to continue individual therapy with her. Maybe it would be to have individual therapy with her and also to do couples therapy with another counselor. There are a number of options. I think she's making too many unilateral decisions.

[chaotic13]

Originally Posted by Martina

My psych nurse says I don't need to see her individually since I'm stable now, and we need to work on the marriage.

Ahhh... who was the psych nurse talking to at this point? I think she should have discussed the idea of discontinuing individual therapy with YOU INDIVIDUALLY before making a statement like this.... HELLO... is it really about HER deciding your are STABLE now...and isn't it YOUR choice if you need to work on the marriage now?

Sorry... Can you tell I'm a bit protective about being in control of my therapy. Thank God my T let's me think I am in charge. :-)

[phoenix7]

Id speak to the psych nurse and tell her your concerns - ts the only way to stop the anxiety jmo

[peaches100]

I would tell her that you want to keep your individual therapy sessions. My husband and I both have individual therapy with two different therapists. We don't do "couples counseling" per se. But what we're learning in individual therapy still helps our marriage. We apply what we learn.

Could you and your husband each see your own therapist?