[TUMIgirl]

So my husband no longer wants in our marriage. We met in 1993, married in 1997 and just this past March has decided he no longer wants to be with me. He has been living at a friends house and visits me and our 9 year old daughter often. I still love him but he does not want to be here. I know it's because of me and my inability to confront my issues. So I'm trying to confront my issues (first step acknowleding there is a problem) and trying to work on them. I also realize i need help. Going to seek therapy starting Monday. But this is my biggest problem: How do I begin to move on? I can't stop thinking of him to the point I'm cyberstalking him. How do I make it each day without obsessing over him. Need help, please. I feel like I'm going crazy at times. All I want to do is sleep so I won't think of him.

[jerrymichele]

Tumigirl I know how you feel. I went threw the same thing when my ex cheated and left me. I think that it's really good that your going to therapy. Unfortunately when we love someone it is hard to let go. I'm really sorry that this is causing you so much pain. You will start to heal as time moves on. When I was separated with my ex my sister and my friends would take me out and do things so that I could get my mind off of him from time to time. I also bought books from John Grey that really helped me. This sounds really crazy, but when I really came to terms that our relationship was over that is when he wanted me back. I couldn't go back because of the abuse. Not just that I'm a happier person now. If you can try to get out of the house for a little bit. Instead of giving him what he wants, try your hardest to give yourself what you need. If you need me send me a pm k.

[marjan]

I'm so sorry for what is happening to you....but you are not the first woman to go through seperation and you won't be the last ones...
Well...to make you feel a little bit better, I've been dumped so many times by guys and I got divorced three years ago
I'm like you...getting obsess and keep thinking thinking what went wrong...and your case is even worse because you guys have kid together and that would bound you with him forever...so, you got to be very strong...I know it's easy to say that, but you can do it....
Well...here is some techniques to get rid of your obsession....
1. exercise everyday
2. meditate
3. do some art work whatever you like
4. have a jurnal and write down your feelings
5. read books that are inspiring you
6. watch movies
7. have faith
8. tell some kind of affirmation everyday to yourself
and this is not the end of the world and he's not the last man on the earth....you don't know what is next for you....you don't know about the futhure and nobody else knows....so stay focused and try to do best for your child, she needs you...
Leave him alone too....sometimes, people need time to think...give him that time....be relaxed...you will be fine....
take care of yourself
with love
Marjan

[QuietAndie]

Hello TumGirl,
I read your message. I have the same issues what you have! I love my last boyfriend so much. He made me so happy in 7months. Until I learn lessons for what I did. But it wasn't my fault for doing this on purpose because I've waited for 4months that he haven't come to visit or spend time with me. Thanksgiving, Christmas, New year eve's and Valentine's day. I was so impatiently without him. I did called my ex-boyfriend to spend time with me instead of him. I regret it for all this for not telling him about me and my ex-boyfriend. I fought so hard to win his heart. He broke up with me last April 7th. I still stubborn that I want him back. Just like you can't think of your husband. I know I'm not married like you. I want to talk to someone to that how can I move on? That's why I decide to come in and join your feelings and maybe we can help each other by let the feelings out of the chest. What do U think?

Originally Posted by TUMIgirl

So my husband no longer wants in our marriage. We met in 1993, married in 1997 and just this past March has decided he no longer wants to be with me. He has been living at a friends house and visits me and our 9 year old daughter often. I still love him but he does not want to be here. I know it's because of me and my inability to confront my issues. So I'm trying to confront my issues (first step acknowleding there is a problem) and trying to work on them. I also realize i need help. Going to seek therapy starting Monday. But this is my biggest problem: How do I begin to move on? I can't stop thinking of him to the point I'm cyberstalking him. How do I make it each day without obsessing over him. Need help, please. I feel like I'm going crazy at times. All I want to do is sleep so I won't think of him.