posting this here as well - dunno how to talk to a friend about something??

turquoisesea · Oct 02, 2009, 09:57 PM

I have a friend who I've known for 3 years now. The past year has been a really rough year for me due to depression and dissociation, going on medical leave for depression from school, going "home" over the summer, and finally finding a job until I can get back into school. I've been distant for a portion of this time but even through all this I've seen this friend and had some "hang out time". Let's call her "A"

The problem is, right now she's got another friend, let's call her "Y". Before "Y" got back into town this friend "A" called me EVERY DAY, and wanted to hang out. Ever since "Y" has gotten back into town I've seen her MUCH less, and every time I call A and Y are together, hanging out. Which means A and I can't hang out

. They keep saying they'll include me but that hasn't happened yet.

Today after work (at 5pm) I called A. She was out with Y but said she'd call when she got back from the mall. At 8pm she called, said she was going to practice for an hour but would we like to hang out after? I said yes. She called again a bit before 9. She got here and we pulled up a show to watch. Partway into the show (45 minutes show) Y called A. A answered and said she'd meet up as soon as the show was over

. Once the show was over, A just waited until Y pulled up infront of my door and left... this hurt alot.
The day before we had plans to hang out but when I called after work to meet up she said she was already out with Y.

I want to approach her about this issue, because it really hurts me that she spent less than an hour at me, and I was totally available all night, purposely kept my night "open" for her, and as soon as Y was available again she basically ditched me. I really think this friend likes me and wants to hang out but I'm just so confused. How do I talk to her about this? I don't know where to begin?

Thank you for reading, thanks for any advice or hugs

VickiesPath · Oct 03, 2009, 08:03 AM

(((((((((((((((( turquoise )))))))))))))))

Simply talk to her. You have every right to feel slighted. Use a lot of "I" and "me" statements. "When this happens, I feel.." etc. It sounds like I would feel the same way. Your friend needs to know that she is hurting your feelings. See if you can make her understand your feelings and find out what she says. She might not be aware that her actions are coming across this way. Good luck.

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posting this here as well - dunno how to talk to a friend about something??

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