[NuckingFutz]

Last thanksgiving i had a potluck for a few friends at my apartment including a friend of a friend. At first this friend of a friend was indispensible; he saved a neighbors cat, ran errands for me and the neighbors, befriended them. Then he started staying on my couch...i told him he couldn't stay because the mgmt said no guests. So i told him to leave and put his stuff out. Couple weeks later he calls to come by. Fine...so he slowly moves back in. He cooks and cleans but makes much more of a mess than he cleans. Then over the months he starts arguing witg me. He does pay my phond bill...around 60 bucks a month. I pay some rent. Section 8 pays the rest. I have even shown him letters frm mgmt showing him that they know he is here. Finally i decide to not renew my lease and go live in veteran's housing. My lease is up on january 1st. Part of me wants to kick him out now and part of me want's to start packing my stuff up and tell him i'm moving out of state and just leave his stuff outside. Don't know what 2 do

[jerrymichele]

Kick his @$$ out. He's a grown man. He's not your responsiblity. If he won't leave call the cops and they will remove him. Don't give up your home for him.

[NuckingFutz]

Yeah, working up the courage to do so. The only reason i have kept him around is i want him to pay the phone bill because i can't pay it this month. A mere 60 bucks is keeping me from peace in my life...ack! do not have even stuff to pawn. Family will only help with medical.

[jerrymichele]

He's getting off really cheap just paying $60.00. A good way to get him to leave is by start charging him rent. He won't like that at all. I use to live in Dallas, and I know it is not cheap to live there. Matter of fact, I have had people tell me that it cost more where you live at then Dallas. I would at least charge him $100.00 a week. This man is taking advantage of you. Just tell him that from here on, that he is going to need to start paying rent. Tell him a $100.00 a week. You can't even get a room that cheap. Texas people are way to nice sometimes, and your one of them. When I lived in Dallas I had some friends of mine help me when I lived there. It's good to help people, but they need to want to help themselves too. You know they might have a hospital there that would cover your meds. Have you ever heard of Parkland Hospital? I know that they would cover alot of meds, and treatment there. I'm not sure if they have a Parkland Hospital where you are at. I would guess that since your in a big city they should have something like Parkland.

[NuckingFutz]

Now just working up the courage. I do not want his stupid money, i just want him out. I am sure i can come up with the phone bill money. I just want him out. I do not have the courage to do this yet...may take a few days. I know i can handle this. The last straw was when he went through my night stand looking for a pen...i was right there in the next room, he could have asked. He seems to have a great sense of entitlement. If i try and talk calmly to him and he tries to put me on the defensive. He's like one of those clumsey people knocking china off the shelves and denying he had anything to do with it. Sometimes i feel like i hate him. May take a day or to get him out just need nerve and opportunity. Hang with me won't you?

[jerrymichele]

Yes I will. I will help as much as I can. If he leaves, you can also put his stuff outside. You won't get into any trouble over it either.

[Depressed Dear]

I would change the lock or call 911 and tell them that you have a intruder. That is just plan scary. I bet he has more issues than just free loading. I don't know about you but, I sure don't need anymore issues to deal with. Good luck giving him the boot.

[NuckingFutz]

Heey depressed dear...my new closet dwelling friend! And jerrymichelle who sticks it out with me through it all. Yeah he has more issues...2 specifically, mr. Pot and mr. Crack. I told him not bring that in the house. So far okay but i can't stand his attitude. My bipolar, i blame everything on that...even my insomnia-imagine that!? He has a pattern of couch hopping with women...imagine his surprise when this lesbian turned down his sexual request. Why do men treat women like sex objects. Asked him if a big strong burly guy came on to him, how sexy he would feel? He does not seem to acknowledge the tension and anger i throw his way. Courage factor is growing. I will keep you posted.

[VickiesPath]

I had one like him move in on me before I met hubby. Call the police. I would be willing to bet that the next thing you see is a gun. Do it NOW!

[NuckingFutz]

Eeks...a gun! I seem to be in a full blown manic episode. Va hospital notified. Family notified. Brother atty advised me to be out of and away from the apartment before notifying the police in case there are drugs or stuff they use drugs with...bro said if i had access, i could be charged. Oh, and the mgmt knows of my "unauthorised occupant". What is it about the chronically homeless? I once asked him if he wanted his own place and he said no. He will be out this morning. Is it just me that needs my own cozy nest away from stress friction and verbal abuse...he has very little idea what a person in a manic phase is capable of. Will keep you updated.

[billieJ]

I'm with those above - notify management, family and attorney that you are going to do this, stay with someone for a day if you can, and call the police to haul him off. We are with you, and from your above post, I hope that this is happening today. I had to do the same thing once. I had just enought funds for a bus ticket to his mother's city in another state and had police come and put him on the bus. Ticket was non-negotiable. You cannot go on like this. Many of us value our privacy. Learning to live on your own is something most of us just grow into, motivated by a desire to live as we like and knowing that requires independence. Some, however, do not. Get out for awhile and call the police.

[AAAAA]

(((Nutz))) I'm no expert by any means, but it was my understanding that section 8 would cut you off if you have any other unauthorized people living with you. Take care of this situation as soon as possible so you do not end up on the streets yourself.

[NuckingFutz]

Aaaaa- the section 8 voucher is under a grant for the mentally ill. That means that they are severely understaffed and also more lenient about the rules across the board...we have drug felons, assault felons and people who mooch off the poor. The housing authority is not kicking me out because of the unauthorised occupant...they are allowing me to finish out my lease because it looks bad to kick out a veteran while allowing danger people va has housing for me

[SUNNY2009]

Dont give up your section 8 .... it takes to long to get it ....I know because I know people on it and who need it .... better to stay and change the lock and dont answer his calls and get on to a paymnt plan for your phone .... maybe take off long dist to lower the bill for a while......but get him out....this is your place and this is your peace ......let him find his own.

sorry to barge in on this thread but ...some people have a lot of nerve and this guy apparently has just that. You must really be a nice person....cuz nice people get jerkamoe's like this trying to take take take and having boundaries and knowing when not to cross the line is something he obviously doesnt get....unfortunately, your gonna have to show him the way out....even though he should know it himself

I think Jerrymichele said it best .... kick his %@! out. so funny made me burst out laughing reading it....but it is true ... he is a grown stinkin man!

btw .... I am from New England .... and I am nice too!

[NuckingFutz]

Yeah, there is a new saying...we get taken advantage of because we are not slick and evil like they are. This guy is going down...telling the cops where his pipe is. But throughout this whole ordeal the thing i hated most was him twisting words around to verbally abuse me. Gaslighting and everything. He acts like it is his place as much as mine. He uses all my razors...oh so much more. He had an offer to go to italy but they would not renew his passport because he owed back child support. That's bad. He makes like 600 dollars a month with only my telephone bill to pay. The rest goes to buy dope. When he's not working he's laying on the couch channel surfing. What a crock! He took the converter box off my tv and put it on his. All that changes today! Mine-mine-mine!

.................................................. HUGS

Thinking of you !

Calm down let others do the work for you don't try and do it yourself you will only get into trouble (been there done that not worth it), Call the police inform them of the drugs explain you have mental health issues and that at the moment you are in a deep depression and can't get him to stop using drugs in YOUR apartment......

Tell them where his 'things' are and leave it up to them.

In the meantime keep your head down at a friend or families house for a few days.

The rest is not your problem its his.

[NuckingFutz]

He's out! All this while in a manic state! I could have physically hurt the guy but i called the mental health deputees for me so i would not do anything stupid. Thank you for all your support and feedback. I am going to take a nice hot bath and shave my legs...with the door open!

[AAAAA]

Ahh, the little pleasures in life!

[jerrymichele]

Originally Posted by NuckingFutz

He's out! All this while in a manic state! I could have physically hurt the guy but i called the mental health deputees for me so i would not do anything stupid. Thank you for all your support and feedback. I am going to take a nice hot bath and shave my legs...with the door open!

I am so proud of you. I know it would be hard to kick someone out. I know you have a good heart but leave the mooches alone. You are worth so much more than that.

[NuckingFutz]

Thank you so much for your support everyone. Felt as you all were standing beside me while he was being escorted out. Sigh...my cyber family. Grin.