[salukigirl]

I just can't lie. I just can't do it. I can't say things if I don't mean them. It makes me feel kind of dirty. So when my bf eggs me on until I flip out, I don't consider that my fault because he was obviously trying to make me upset. And he asked for an apology and I refused to say it because I honestly don't feel sorry. Is that wrong?

[AkAngel]

I don't think it's wrong not to apologize when you don't mean it, but my opinion is just that... I think everyone gets to make up their own mind what is acceptable behavior for them.

That said, you may not feel it is appropriate to apologize for getting angry - I know I don't, anger is part of the human experience; you might find it acceptable to apologize for things that you said or did while angry. In my opinion, anger is okay, beating people up with that anger is not okay and so, I will not apologize for my anger but I might apologize for something I did while I was angry.

If you can't apologize for that it's probably because you meant everything you said or did, which might mean that you don't like him very much and he's not all that good a fit for you.

[salukigirl]

I didn't say or do anything out of the ordinary - it was the tone. I was basically yelling at him to chill out. Which I completely meant. And I do apologize when I say or do something outrageous while angry but when I say the same things I normally do but only angry...that I don't feel I should apologize for.

[perpetuallysad]

I don't think you are required to apologize. I am not much of a liar either and I cannot fake a feeling to save my life. If I don't feel it, its not going to be genuine and considering he knows you, he should be able to tell that your apology would not be genuine.

Good luck girl. Things don't seem to be progressing positively for you guys. When are you moving to Arkansas?

[salukigirl]

We just moved on Sunday. It is definitely a trial period for us in this whole moving process. He has of course gotten upset about some things, and I understand he is stressed because he can't find a job. But one positive thing I noticed is that my lab manager asked if we wanted to come over for Memorial Day and he sounded really excited about going and kept talking about liking to meet new people. It's just going to take some time to figure out which way this is going to go.

[perpetuallysad]

Good luck to you. I'm glad that he's looking forward to meeting new people. That's definitely a good sign. I hope things work out well.