[clouds_and_sun]

My only friend used to be my best friend for 15 years, not anymore. See almost for 2 years now she has been so obsessed over this actor (everything is about this actor to her), she wants me to obsess over him like she does and I refuse to. As a result she gets very angry with me.
I am nothing but a puppet to her now, I either talk about the actor and if I don't talk about him like she wants, she will let me have it. Somedays are better than others, but for the most part she has slipped away in this obsession of hers and she refuses to seek help for it.
It really does hurt, first my parents abandon me and now she has dropped our friendship and become toxic all cause of this actor.
I would have left long ago but I have no where to go, I don't drive (major fear of driving) and was told by an ER doctor that a homeless shelter would be too dangerous for me, or I would have went. I have no family, no money, no other friends, nothing! I am trapped
I did research about toxic friends and from a lot of stuff that I read my friend is toxic.
I want out and I don't know how to escape. I have been without a job for over a year and my mental disability (anxiety, depression and panic disorder) is hindering me from finding a job, and I am even on medication for it.
My only friend got into yet another arguement (we have had many) about how our friendship is dead now, she refuses to see it, she thinks everything is just "peachy", it is not.
I have been praying for so long for God to take me, why should I be alive??... just to be her puppet. Surly God has something better for me than to be her puppet....
I just don't know what to do anymore, I feel so stuck.

[Soul Quake]

Your life is going to stagnate even further if you continue putting up with this nonsense - she is part of the problem. The first step in taking your life back might just be ridding yourself of this parasite. Do you have a therapist you can speak with?

As for the job issue, there are vocational rehabilitation organizations that help people in your situation.

[Perna]

Can you apply for disability; that might be a good step, getting your own money so you have more options. I would explore your neighborhood too, see if you can make some more friends at church, the library, any social organizations, get "out" of the house more so you don't have to deal with your friend's obsession so much.