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ICanHazSanityPlz?
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Trig Mar 27, 2011 at 07:30 PM
  #1
Well, here's what happened. The evening started with my aspie gf finding that her companion bear had a peice missing from his ear. She had the bear since 2 months old and is now in her 20s. Wededucted it was done by her dad who is going through a divorce with my gf mother. He hates my gf- don't kmow why. One thing led to another and i'm in the kitchen telling him 'if i had a daughter who was raped i would support her instead of telling the police she was a liar.' he came at me with his fist raised and gf and mother tried to stop him. He then turned on them and tried to hit them. I got in between them and raised my hands so that he couldn't hit them. I said 'calm down!' he said 'no, get out my house'
He then punched, pushed and kicked me(not in that order) and i decided that attention had now been turned away from the women so i left with him following me.
My gf called police from inside and i called from outside. He was cuffed and put in a cell overnight. He has been violent to gf b4 but police were never called.
Long story short, he said he acted in self defense as i hit him first. I didn't. An independant lawyer looked at my statement, gf mum statement and gf dad statement. He favours mine and gf mums statements. He is due to appear in court next month. I am worried about the case. Thoughts please?

Last edited by FooZe; Mar 27, 2011 at 10:21 PM.. Reason: added trigger icon
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Can't Stop Crying
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Default Mar 28, 2011 at 05:54 AM
  #2
Wow! That is a lot, but you did the right thing in getting the police involved. Judges can usually see right through the whole self-defense crap, especially when you have statements supporting your side. Court will probably be very short, a lot of times first time offenders (depending on where you live) are given diversion or probation. Have you and your GF taken out an order of protection against him? I would strongly recommend that! Stay safe, you did the right thing!

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upcoming court case. thoughts?

Children's talent to endure stems from their ignorance of alternatives.
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Thanks for this!
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Default Mar 28, 2011 at 07:17 AM
  #3
after reading your post i'd recommend you get a protection order against him. different states have different names for it. your lawyer can submit it to the judge. you prob want to obtain a police report about what happened to you by him attached to your request. it's not as complicated as some may think. the prot. order would require him to stay away from you. wherever you are he has to leave. he will be served so he will know the courts mean business. the order will be specific regarding no contact with you.
this man is capable of more physical violence. beware of him.

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Do not let your fire go out, spark by irreplaceable spark, in the hopeless swamps of the approximate, the not-quite, the not-yet, the not-at-all. Do not let the hero in your soul perish, in lonely frustration for the life you deserved, but have never been able to reach. Check your road and the nature of your battle.
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ICanHazSanityPlz?
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Default Mar 28, 2011 at 08:24 AM
  #4
Thanks for the advice, people! Firstly, I live in England so laws differ. I also cannot get a protection order because the mother still lives there and I still go back there regularly in case confrontation arises and I need to step in again. The mother sleeps in our flat bur goes to the 'family house' everyday to feed her dogs and cook for her son.
I don't have proper Internet at the moment as I'm in between addresses. Can someone please find me a accurate and concise symptom/behaviour list of a sociopath? Also, in a list form would be ideal. I think that is what the father is. I looked up the word evil last night in various sources and sites. He fits the bill.
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Default Mar 28, 2011 at 11:23 AM
  #5
Profile of a sociopath taken from the internet

Features
Glibness and Superficial charm
Manipulative and Conning
Grandiose Sense of self
Pathological lying
Lack of remorse, shame, or guilt
shallow emotions
Incapacity for love
Need for Stimulation
Callousness/Lack of empathy
Poor behavioral controls/Impulsive Nature
Irresponsibility/Unreliability
Promiscuous Sexual Behavior/Infidelity
Lack of realistic life plan/Parasitic lifestyle
Criminal or Entrepreneurial Versatility

This list is not all inclusive or diagnostic, just a list of common features associated with sociopaths.

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upcoming court case. thoughts?

Children's talent to endure stems from their ignorance of alternatives.
~ Maya Angelou


Thank you SadNEmpty for my avatar and signature.

Last edited by Can't Stop Crying; Mar 28, 2011 at 02:11 PM..
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ICanHazSanityPlz?
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Default Mar 28, 2011 at 12:12 PM
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That is EXCELLENT! Thank you! Just what I asked for.
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Can't Stop Crying
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Default Mar 28, 2011 at 12:19 PM
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I don't know very much about the laws in England, please make sure you, your girlfriend, and her mother stay safe!

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upcoming court case. thoughts?

Children's talent to endure stems from their ignorance of alternatives.
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Default Mar 28, 2011 at 12:38 PM
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The girlfriend and mother might consider asking the court to order the violent dude removed from the premises.
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ICanHazSanityPlz?
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Default Mar 28, 2011 at 01:16 PM
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Yes. I would like them to have him removed. I think if it happens again, they will.
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ICanHazSanityPlz?
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Default Sep 25, 2013 at 06:09 PM
  #10
Well, it turns out the father is into incest. My gf is no longer my gf and, now that we're married, she confided in me that he hates her because she 'left' him. Clearly a very sick man.... But not as sick as the mother who is, to this day, jealous of her own daughter for getting more 'sex' than her from her husband.
And in case anyone is interested, he got off without any charges and I suspect my mother in law of helping him out with that despite being in the middle of a divorce at the time. It wouldn't be the first time that she helped keep him out of prison for assaulting their own daughter. What a disgusting family. I'm glad we moved away.
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Default Sep 26, 2013 at 02:43 AM
  #11
Im glad things worked out for you in the end.

Its terrible that nothing happened to the father though.
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ICanHazSanityPlz?
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Default Sep 26, 2013 at 03:05 AM
  #12
Quote:
Originally Posted by Confusedinomicon View Post
Im glad things worked out for you in the end.

Its terrible that nothing happened to the father though.
I just hope he can't live with himself.
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