[mistyeyesnva]

B/f and I have stayed away from each other for 3 weeks. He had left me messages and we started talking again.I still see him online but he swears he isn't so what is a person to do? do I believe him ? my gut feeling is no but my heart is saying yes.during the time he was sending me messages it showed him as idle for hrs but now that I gave in and we are seeing each other again I go online and see him online only for him to tell me he isn't...I'm confused and feel bad for thinking he is online for long periods of time but I'm only going by what I'm seeing. according to him I'm not seeing it correctly...grrrrrrrrr

[Leed]

He swears he isn't WHAT? Online? So what? If he is, what's the big crime? He could be surfing, or he could be downloading music. You don't have any proof that he's doing something bad. Before you start blaming him of something, you'd better make sure you have more proof than being online. lol That's no crime.

Don't keep nagging at him about stuff or he'll go out and DO it. Wait til you KNOW for SURE that he's doing something -- he might never do anything. He might be true-blue. LOL Best of luck. Hugs, Lee

[Direction]

One thing I think about when reading this...I hope you haven't immediately resumed sex when there is some degree of uncertainity. Sex has a huge tendency to carry a lot of unspoken expectations into the relationship.

So make sure you two talk about what you each want from the relationship...take starting up again slow...think about what boundaries you will have...not sure I would spend much time on this online as mentioned by Leed

[mistyeyesnva]

Hello again,
Responding to Leed . um , first off he met me online 13 yrs ago, he has made a profile on a dating sight before and got pissed at me for accusing him then later admitted to doing it. He has made up another screen name and then once again denied again of doing anything but admitted later on that the reason he did it was to look for me ....so , I think I DO have reason to not trust him. I know this guy very very well & I also know that a few hrs online for him is unusual...I was just looking for help NOT for someone too jump all over me...hope you have a nice day!

[Direction]

What you describing now regarding online dating site...sounds like a whole bunch of mind games on his part...you don't need that...stay healthy

[Leed]

Perhaps if you had given ALL the information, we could have given you better advice. Take care. Hugs, Lee

[LadyD1978]

Originally Posted by mistyeyesnva

Hello again,
Responding to Leed . um , first off he met me online 13 yrs ago, he has made a profile on a dating sight before and got pissed at me for accusing him then later admitted to doing it. He has made up another screen name and then once again denied again of doing anything but admitted later on that the reason he did it was to look for me ....so , I think I DO have reason to not trust him. I know this guy very very well & I also know that a few hrs online for him is unusual...I was just looking for help NOT for someone too jump all over me...hope you have a nice day!

I know what you are going threw been there, done that. When I was still with my ex I had the same sort of problem. Although I didn't meet him online I found out after we had been living together for a few years he was going online and setting up accounts on dating sights, a lot of them. He spent a lot of time online and most nights I went to bed alone while he stayed up a chatted on yahoo messenger. Didn't bother me to much at first but one day he left for work and forgot to log out of his yahoo account and me being the busy body that I am looked. I know it was wrong but I had to. Well as the old saying go's those who look for trouble soon find it, well I found it. He had been on there talking to other women, having cybersex with a few one of them being an ex girlfriend. So I know what you are talking about, I know that sick feeling you get in your gut when you know he is online. I wish you well and hope you can find some peace.