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#1
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No idea if I'm in the right place (I'm a new member), but maybe you can give me some advice....
I have a family member that is suspect is a compulsive liar. I never noticed it until I started writing the stories down, only then I saw that the stories doesn't connect to each other (it's about the same subject - but with 4 different stories that are worlds apart from each other). This person is very manipulative and every time a conversation gets heated they want to end the relationship completely and also start talking about how sick they are and they don't know how long they have to live. This person has a bad childhood history with abuse, among other things. I would just like to know how do I deal with this, because writing this person off is not an option, I would rather try to help, but they insist that they are never wrong. How do I deal with this? And what is wrong with this person? Last edited by FooZe; Aug 17, 2011 at 01:53 PM. Reason: no text changes -- cleared icon, moved to different forum |
#2
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Hi, Annonomous, welcome to PsychCentral (PC). Can't say what's wrong with the person; I'd wait for when they start talking about how sick they are and going to die, etc. and ask about their doctor/medical visits? :-) and if you can help by going with them to visit the doctor.
I'm glad you are not taken in by the stories this person feels the need to create. I think I would relax about their story telling; try not to "challenge" them too much and just know and present your own truth. Keep your own boundaries strong (i.e., if they want you to do something you do not want to or don't think is healthy for them, don't do it) and just kind of "cave" when they get manipulative, not able to "do" what they want that you don't want.
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"Never give a sword to a man who can't dance." ~Confucius |
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#3
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You already see this person for what they are. Keep your boundries and take what they say with a grain of salt and besides its not your problem.....its there's
Life is too short to worry about this now.
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Selfishness is not living as one wishes to live, it is asking others to live as one wishes to live. Oscar Wilde Well Behaved Women Seldom Make History - Laurel Thatcher Ulrich The road to hell is paved with good intentions. "And psychology has once again proved itself the doofus of the sciences" Sheldon Cooper ![]() |
#4
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I have a sister that fits into that description. After years of listening to her go on and on about how badly she was treated, and then watching her manipulate everyone, including her own kids, I knew I had to step back. I wonder why you feel you have the need to rescue her and take on her issues by supporting her. I think at some point everyone is accountable to themselves, and sometimes we are enabling them to not see things as they really are. I made strong boundaries with my sister and no longer feel responsible for her, the best thing I could have ever done. She was toxic to me.
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As I lay down in bed each night I look up at the stars and wonder "where the heck is my ceiling?" ![]() |
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