[seeker1950]

Well,OMG....Here I find myself, after sev. years of feeling "healthy,"and not having to ask any questions in the "relationships" forum, only giving advice occasionally...feeling the victim. I must say I hate to post about this, and maybe I'm just plain weak!
I've been teaching at the same school for 23 years, always had amicable relations with fellow teachers and administrators. Recently, I've been the target of humiliation by the principal...and in front of the whole school: teachers and students. It's a very awkward position in which to be placed, causing me much loss of sleep. This female principal has driven off many longterm teachers at our school, and I seem to be the latest of her focus. We had one of our emergency drills, this time a "code white" which is a weather emergency. I had been to the team meeting the previous day about this, and was told I was to go to the girls' locker room with my 7th grade students. I did so, though I questioned this since the previous year I had gone to the Tech ED. room. So, there I was in the girls locker room, when the announcement came over the intercom..."Ms. Wolford, report to the office." I left to go there, and was met in the hallway by the principal. I told her I thought I was to go to with my girls to the locker room, but I departed to the Tech Ed. room. Then, after the drill was over, the principal made the point of making a "speech" pointedly at me over the intercom about being aware of our location. Then...of all things, this morning, when I reported to school, one of my fellow teachers drew me into the office, and said the principal ordered her to read the directions to me for the next emergency drill...a "code blue." I already knew the code blue and abruptly, I stopped her, told her so, and left the office. I'm really appalled that the principal thought it necessary to elicit a fellow teacher to "read" the directions to me!
I've avoided my principal. I have applied for another job! I'm really offended! Yeah...maybe I'm overreacting.
Your feedback very helpful.
Patty

[lynn P.]

((seeker1950)) - I agree with was an overreaction on the Principal's part and definitely not right for her to overcompensate and involve another teacher. For now play it cool until you find another job. I hope it all works out for you.

[Perna]

This is where boundaries and your anger at being treated this way can come in. I would go to the principal and tell her you will not tolerate public humiliation ever again, either before teachers, students, or both, and if she ever asks another teacher to do her job for her in telling you what and where you are supposed to do/go, you will be forced to take the issue of her inappropriate behavior to her supervisor.

[seeker1950]

Originally Posted by lynn P.

((seeker1950)) - I agree with was an overreaction on the Principal's part and definitely not right for her to overcompensate and involve another teacher. For now play it cool until you find another job. I hope it all works out for you.

LynnP...You know, I just love you here on PC. I do sincerely thank you for your response. At age 60, it is really hard to face the prospect of a job change. If, and a big IF, I should be considered for the job, it would mean selling my house and moving to a distant location. But, this evening, I did drive to the P.O. and mail the application. As I filled out the application, for a job with a youth corrections facility, it occurred to me how I was answering all the questions just right...and that they might actually want me there!, but that I have fear about change. I really just don't know.
Thanks, anyway.
Patty

[lynn P.]

I agree...good advice Perna. Actually Patti I think you should go with Perna's suggestion - I was going to advise being honest with your feelings first and if she continues to bother you then go to her superior. I'm not aware if you have a similar school system as in Canada where the Principals are accountable for their behavior. I would go this route first and document it in writing and keep a copy in case you need to go above her head.

[seeker1950]

Originally Posted by Perna

This is where boundaries and your anger at being treated this way can come in. I would go to the principal and tell her you will not tolerate public humiliation ever again, either before teachers, students, or both, and if she ever asks another teacher to do her job for her in telling you what and where you are supposed to do/go, you will be forced to take the issue of her inappropriate behavior to her supervisor.

Wow! Perna! That is really strong! I wonder if I could be so strong!?
One thing I have definitely observed among the faculty...is that anytime there is a question as to what to do about any issue, teachers will go to any, I mean ANY, lengths, to avoid going to her directly. I have been slow and naive in observing this. For now, for my own mental health, I feel like just avoiding her....and the friend who was sucked into following her direction to read directions to me. This was one of my "best" friends.

[lynn P.]

She sounds like a bully - too bad you couldn't take someone with you for support - what's good for the goose is good for the gander lol. Maybe you could give it to her in writing and if things don't improve then go over her head and let them deal with her. She needs someone to stand up to her.

[arcangel]

We had one of our emergency drills, this time a "code white" which is a weather emergency. I had been to the team meeting the previous day about this, and was told I was to go to the girls' locker room with my 7th grade students. I did so, though I questioned this since the previous year I had gone to the Tech ED. room. So, there I was in the girls locker room, when the announcement came over the intercom..."Ms. Wolford, report to the office." I left to go there, and was met in the hallway by the principal. I told her I thought I was to go to with my girls to the locker room, but I departed to the Tech Ed. room.

You were told to go where you went. What was the principal's reaction when you told her you were instructed to go where you went? And I'm curious about who it was who gave you the order to go there. Do you think you were "set up" for this to happen as it did?
At any rate I agree with what Perna said. Don't allow this.

[Perna]

Originally Posted by seeker1950

and the friend who was sucked into following her direction to read directions to me. This was one of my "best" friends.

Practice on the friend, since she is/was a friend? I would just chat with her and more gently tell her not to come to you with anyone else's problem, and maybe even ask her if she has her own problems with the principal and would like to work on it/your joint problems together?

[AAAAA]

I would definately speak to the principal about this! You should be offended! If you do not feel that you can tell her in person, send her an email letting her know exactly how you feel and that this is not acceptable at all, in fact you view it as harrassment. I'd go a step further and talk to your union rep. BCC the union rep.

[seeker1950]

Originally Posted by Perna

Practice on the friend, since she is/was a friend? I would just chat with her and more gently tell her not to come to you with anyone else's problem, and maybe even ask her if she has her own problems with the principal and would like to work on it/your joint problems together?

Perna
Thank you for your advice! Much appreciated! Typing for first time on iPad here, and in bed for tonight. Friend and principal are super tight. Most I could say to friend is that I'm concerned she so readily followed principal's directions. But I do thank you for your thoughts on the matter!
Patty

[seeker1950]

Originally Posted by arcangel

You were told to go where you went. What was the principal's reaction when you told her you were instructed to go where you went? And I'm curious about who it was who gave you the order to go there. Do you think you were "set up" for this to happen as it did?
At any rate I agree with what Perna said. Don't allow this.

That's a perceptive observation on your part, archangel. I saw our team leader covering his tracks w/principal after the incident. Then, he made speech to me about where I was supposed to have been during the drill. Really not worth pursuing as it would only appear I was making excuses for myself. All the other teachers on my team just want to protect themselves, and I can' t say I blame them.

[AAAAA]

Aren’t these procedures supposed to be in writing available to all so that these types of miscommunications do not happen?

[SolutionIsProcess]

Wow! Good for you for taking control and recognizing that kind of work environment is not good for you. That takes guts. I believe you are doing the right thing and wish you the best.

[Visioneer]

Wow. Sounds like this woman is really unprofessional. It really is crappy that after so many years in a job that you were comfortable with, and people you liked, this person has to come along and ruin it I don't understand her motive, but I never do with people who do that kind of thing. Why is she playing people against each other? Why does she single you out? It's sad that she has pushed good teachers away. But most importantly, the stress she's casing you right now is awful.

It's so hard to stand up for yourself, I know. And not being used to people acting that way, it's hard to know how to react, and you just end up feeling victimized with no recourse. Is there someone over her head that you can go to? Can your friend back you up? It sounds like everyone is walking on eggshells.

[falling star]

I am so sorry you are going through this. When I had boss issues, I took lots of notes. Then, just in case there was a problem I could refer back to my notes. Documentation is the best course of action and i do hope you find another job. I just quit for a similar situation and now its super hard without a job, but I had to quit because I couldn't take it anymore. I hope you can hang in there a little longer until you find another job.

[Butterflies Are Free]

I would go to your building rep, your teacher's union, and report what happened.
They need to work with you to stop your principal from bullying you.