[MrBVS]

My wife has suffered from depression for several years. With the recent loss of her job, it has gotten much worse. I have always been supportive and understanding. However, we have not intimate for a couple of years and it is effecting our relationship.

For the record, I have no interest in cheating, nor do I plan on leaving the marriage. I am simply looking for effective ways to discuss this situation with my wife without making her feel guilty or inadequate.

Please share your thoughts.

[kykid]

Depression will effect your desire for sexual contact, but with proper therapy, this can be corrected. Two years is an awfully long time for lack of intimacy. You deserve a lot of credit for remaining loyal for that length of time because most men would fail to remain so.

I would suggest going to the Dr with your wife and discussing this with him/her. My doctor often asks me how my love life is and I am very open with him about this. When I was having trouble in the past with intimacy, he changed the dosage and medications that he was prescribing (I was having other issues as well, indicating that the medication wasn't working). If both of you work at it, this can be overcome in time.

Is your wife on medication for her depression? I know that some meds can affect your sex drive, I also agree with what Kykid said too about depression can affect your desire for sex, Maybe your wife needs to talk about this in therapy? Good luck

[alwaysrejoice]

If it were me I would love for my husband to have a heart to heart talk about it. Just tell her how much you love her and you want to show her your love in that way.

She may be different but that is what I would like to hear.

If that doesnt work have her talk to her pdoc or you go with her to talk about it.