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#1
Feb 08, 2012, 09:02 AM
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My boyfriends grandmother is dying. Hospice just got involved and I have no idea how to handle this situation.. any advice?
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#2
Feb 08, 2012, 02:53 PM
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I would just get as much info on the situation as you can and as well as offering emotional support (if your up to giving it) see if theres anything you can do practically to help, whether this be talking to the doctors or running errands. Its the small gestures that are often appreciated the most so just be there in anyway u can and im sure your boyfriend will be grateful. Good luck.
Edit: and remember if ur bf doesn't want to discuss the issue don't push it, he'll come around in his own time. Or if ur finding the opposite is the case and he wants to talk about it more than your comfortable with you have to try and be honest about that. Your wellbeing is important in this situation too and if your not feeling as strong as you can be your probably not going to be able to support him as well as you'd like providing of course he wants the support. Again good luck. |
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#3
Feb 08, 2012, 04:16 PM
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CharSloth, I have done hospice volunteer work. If your bf is very close to his grandmother, he needs to visit her often and be there for her when he can. As far as your involvement goes, if you know the grandmother, just be yourself. There is nothing more depressing for a dying person than oozing with sympathies. If she is still alert, she likely is prepared more than you or your bf would believe. Older people have a lot of moxie when facing death very often. However,some who have led a disfunctional life, usually have disfunctional families and their deaths are not so healthy. I see no need for you to worry about this. If bf needs someone to listen; you can be that person. It all depends on variables within the particular family.
hugs, bj
__________________
The scientists’ religious feeling takes the form of a rapturous amazement at the harmony of natural law, which reveals an intelligence of such superiority that, compared with it, all the systematic thinking and acting of human beings is an utterly insignificant reflection.Albert Einstein |
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#4
Feb 08, 2012, 08:10 PM
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I would echo Callmebj. Just be yourself, and make sure he knows that you're there for him when/if he needs you to be.
You have to take a little solace in the rather hard fact that while there's nothing you can say that'll make it not hurt, but plenty you can say to ease him though this. The best you can do for him is to be there for him, and make sure he knows that if he needs you, you're there. That's really all you can do. I will keep you both in my prayers. |
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